A BIG Ten Things Tuesday

Being the last month of school, we've been more heavily involved in school things. Son #1 goes to middle school next year (6-7-8 grades) and son#2 is having issues staying at school
so I thought I'd just show you with some pictures what we've been up to.

1. Rainbow day at son#2's school. Each grade wears a certain color & the clear a parking lot while someone stands on the roof and takes a school picture.
2. Son #1's latest funny journal entries:

If I went to the desert, I would see : snakes. It is hot in the desert. I would see cacti.
The last time I cried was: Grayson ate my Lays. I got another one. That made me happy.
If I could build a robot: like Moby. I can install his speech function. He would say give me fifty dollars.
I smile (it said scream & he crossed it out & put smile) whenever I see: ants. They look for crumbs. They are cute.
A place that seems interesting is: New York. It has cities in it.
Right now something I really need is: a few bags of Lays. I need them because I'm keeping them. I eat them.
The telephone is an important invention because: you call someone far away. You can call your family. I call the police.
I'd like to invent a machine that: makes lightsabers. It has a red blade. I make it out of glass.
My favorite thing to talk about is: nothing. I don't have to talk. I have nothing to say.

3. Tuscany Brand Brushetta from Sam's. And Multi-Grain crackers from Sam's. Yummo!

4. My new gadget that has me eating A LOT of fresh pineapple!

5. Son#2 went to back to school today & hopefully when the baby naps, I'll get some time alone!

6. The month of May has tons of good movies coming out so Hubbo and I are on the path to see several this month starting with Star Trek. He went last night, and hopefully tonight I'll go.

7. Son#3 has enough hair that after he got an electric train stuck in his hair & we had to cut it out close the scalp, there's not even a hole in his mop of a head.

8. I plugged in a nightlight last week about the time that lightning struck closeby. It sparked, barely zapped my thumb but there was not ONE piece of glass found or metal from that bulb. Nothing but stink & black soot.




9. The local Autism walk was this past Saturday & we had a load of fun. For the first time all the Swaims got to participate. I was thrilled we could all be there! Even though dark weather was looming, we had a great turn out of a lot more people than usual. Possibly because they pushed it back a couple of weeks later this year. We had it at a new place too that I think was much more suited to the walk. Special thanks from the bottom of my heart to Carrie & her family, Tracey, Tamara and all of son#1's teachers/principal and administrators for showing up to support us all.
10. And last, yesterday was our field trip to son#1's school he'll attend next year--Middle school.
I had no idea I'd be so emotional over it. But seeing these boys I recognized from earlier years was just so overwhelming! They were so tall, most taller than me. And one greeted us at the door, showing his previous teacher that was with us, he had a moustache now. HA! We had a tour, lunch & got to meet a lot of the their teachers and kids he'll be with next year. It was a blast & I'm so happy I went. It's interesting to be an outsider watching the way a young person with Autism can communicate with another person on the spectrum. Or what they choose to communicate about. These kids were such a joy that I'm loosing my trepidation about son#1 moving on & growing up.

Ten Things Thursday

1. I'm thankful that the week is almost over. Son#2 may go to school tomorrow so today sort of feels like Friday to me.

2. I'm thankful that now we KNOW what son#2 is like, completely off meds. It's been three years since we began that journey. But we're still going to try & find a new one to help him cope with his emotions.

3. I'm thrilled my whole family will be doing the Autism walk this Saturday!!

4. I'm very excited Mother's Day is Sunday. Bring on the indulgence! That's always fun & the kids are already bringing me flowers from school. Son #1 even brought me two yesterday. When I asked him why he got to bring two, he said Noah said his mother wouldn't like them. Oh my--I hope the teacher knows!

5. I was thankful I finished two books in the last two weeks. And for an upbeat book this last month in my book club. It was an autobiography called "A Girl Named Zippy" about growing up in a tiny town in Indiana. And this month we're reading the classic "To Kill A Mockingbird".

6. Our fridge/freezer locked up but we were lucky that it only cost $175 and was repairable. I did not want to have to buy a new fridge (although I do want a bigger boy sized fridge) to fit this house.

7. I'm thankful my aunt's surgery went well even though they had to replace her elbow joint. And that a friends car accident & cardiologist report were nothing significant.

8. And since we've had to be on the phone every day & multiple times a day with our doctor/nurse, we are truly thankful they care, give us their cell numbers & call to check in. We feel like royalty with their care & concern.

9. I'm always thankful for low-drama friends. Let's hear it for the normal & boring!!!

10. And finally, I'm so thankful that I got some medical stuff figured out & maybe now I won't be slug mommy and I can return to my regular go-go-go self.

Five Things You Might Not Know About Our Household

Some people don't understand much about living with Autism, while others have seen a lot. But living with it daily & in our case in double amounts, there are every day things you may not realize.
Things that most all of us take for granted and may not realize the struggle it poses at our house. Obviously Autism is different for every person & each caregiver handles it different ways. This is just some of the stuff that goes on here at our house & how we handle it.

1. My kids don't blow their noses. You can try to explain the process over & over, and son#1 tries, but no dice. It'd sure help them tremendously if they could. The amount of sneezes they produce & the ferocity with which they sneeze...you'd be amazed. No one goes to college not knowing how to tie their shoes, but I really hope we can blow our nose by then.

2. Son #2 is not potty trained & after dinner is his "business" time. He sometimes even plays in it like a toddler. (Carrie didn't you have a story to tell me about this?) That's never fun to clean up on an 8 year old or the things around him. And we're in the biggest pull-ups they make. But it's very hard to reason and explain the digestive process to someone that doesn't speak and shows no interest. When son#1 potty trained, he watched the commercial for pull-ups & just wanted to be "a big kid now. Just like talking, late to the game, but when he did it, he just did it.

3. It took EIGHT years into our marriage before we got to sleep through the night on a regular basis. I guess it wasn't that terrible when you're right out of college and you're used to no sleep. But once I hit 30, I started to notice. We were so thankful that son#3 slept through the night from the get go. We felt we earned that one.

4. Son#2 loves food. He likes to watch me cook it, and eating is his favorite sport. This poses a problem after dinner. We barely get set down to eat ourselves, and he's almost done eating. As soon as dinner is over, we have to clean up--IMMEDIATELY. Any food left in pots/pans or on plates, all have to be cleaned up immediately or son#2 plays in it, strings it around the house or eats it. No pans soaking in our sinks or he plays in the water. At the end of the day after making dinner, the last thing I want to do is jump up & clean the entire kitchen. But we pay for it if we don't.

5. Our kids don't swallow medicine. They WILL throw up. So we have been fortunate enough to find a doctor that calls in almost anything to the compounding pharamcy so that we can have it topical form. It comes in a syringe without a needle, and is like lotion. In fact, son #1 still calls it "lotion medicine". We have Tylenol, Ibuprofen, and Phenegren for throwing up. If they just made one for the runs, we'd be set!

Side Effects

Well, we've had some side effects pop up for son#2. We were confused for awhile about where the cause of the effects were coming from. Was it the old meds he was on for three years or was it the new meds meeting some of the old in his body & having a reaction. He's ticing his head to the side & rolling his neck so violently & so often, that there was a point where we were worried he'd have convulsions or a seizure. Easter weekend it was happening every 2 seconds literally. Poor kid was smart enough to figure out if he laid down in bed, the gravity would hold his head back. He didn't even sit at the dinner table, his favorite place. When he would sit there for 5 minutes, he'd hold his head in his hand. It was horrible to watch as a parent & nto be able to help.We couldn't even demonstrate it to someone without getting dizzy after a couple of throws of the head. And we weren't doing it nearly as hard. Not to mention I'm sure he had a headache but couldn't tell us. We were afraid to leave him alone in a room or give him a bath or shower, in case he fell & hurt himself.

After seeing the doctor yesterday, she is afraid he has Dystonia Movement Disorder. We are to see a psychiatrist because they are more familiar with seeing this and can tell the difference between that & just tics. It really isn't too promising considering that it's a vicious cycle. If son#2 doesn't take the meds, he hurts himself. When he takes the meds, he ticcing and that could lead to permanent ticcing or paralysis in the neck.

We are trying to be patient & wait but as a parent, that's not what I want to do, nor is it what's the easiest thing to do. He is making tons of strides at school and is really maturing in many ways. The ticcing has lessened, but he walks around with his arm over his head, holding his head still. As the doctor said, "Like the poor kid needs one more thing to work through." Hopefully we'll have answers soon, but in the meantime, we wait.

Autism & Bare Minerals Make-Up--Help Us Raise $$!

Since April is Autism Awareness month, what better time to release a fund raising opportunity for the cause! Below was posted on my Bare Escentuals Addicts (BEA) bulletin board a couple of weeks ago.* Click anything that has a different color to purchase or read more about.

I was so pleased to be given such a fun and enjoyable opportunity to help raise money for Autism. Please feel free to buy more than one for teacher gifts, Mother's Day, Christmas or birthday presents or just to help raise money. They are $13. ~Julie


The BE Cares team at Bare Escentuals, are thrilled to tell you that the Spring 2009 BEAUTY Cares Campaign is ready to launch.

This campaign will raise funds for Autism Awareness with a donation to Autism Research International through the sale of a specially created color called "Puzzle". Puzzle was created by Julie Swaim, a long-time member of BE Addicts and the mom of two autistic boys, Jackson and Carson.

Jules worked with BE to provide lots of input into the creation of a color which describes all the many, many aspects of the autism spectrum. The result is a gorgeous, shimmery, ever-changing kaleidoscope of sparklies in a base of creamy lavender-pink. As with our other BEAUTY Cares colors, Puzzle is versatile. You can wear it dry for a more subdued neutral look, but if you want to really show it off and unearth its full spectrum of characteristics, foil it with a damp brush.

We hope you'll love Puzzle as much as we do and that you'll pull out all the stops to help put this charity color over the top, just like you've done each and every time. Please click this link to purchase the eye color. Puzzle will be available in all BE Boutiques until the end of the charity campaign or stock is exhausted, whichever comes first.

Feel free to link to this message on other people who will want to participate in our fund raiser. We want to create a hugely fantastic donation for Autism Research Institute and make sure we have a sell-out of the color.

Thanks for your support!
The BE Cares team

* I've deleted some names as well as the info that is now irrelevant.

Ten Things Tuesday

1. Hubbo brought me 3 magazines, including a knitting one & a word search book from the store Sunday.

2. My friend Tammy brought us homemade pot roast Saturday night with carrots & potatoes. Rolls, grapes & some iced brownies that Hubbo LOVED. Thanks Tammy!

3. I can put more pressure on my foot now, just not much at a time.

4. I got to go scrapbook Friday night with my friends. My husband was kind enough to drop me off & my friend Terry & her husband Max were nice enough to take me home. I didn't get a huge amount done, but boy was it nice to get out.

5. Hubbo's still getting kids ready in the mornings & on the bus. Which is a good thing. It takes me FOREVER to wake up after taking a pain pill at night. I'm yawning as I write this.

6. Today is Mr. Johnny's birthday. Mr. Johnny is the janitor at son#1's school. He wears overalls & is very soft spoken but so good with the kids. And son#1 has taken a special liking to him. Mr Johnny even sent son#1 a coloring book & crayons when he was home after having his tonsils out. And on his birthday one year sent him a card with 8 crisp one dollar bills. (son#1's favorite number) Today the kids are dressing in overalls & flannel shirts & bringing birthday cards. Since it's son#1's last year there, the teacher will take a picture for me. We've been very lucky & blessed to have such great people at our sons' schools. Even the janitors care!

7. Hubbo brought another surprise from the store the other day, to eat after the kids went to bed.8. The church we attend has hired a new preacher & they have an Autistic son who has some issues with staying in services. I believe he is 16 years old. This is very encouraging because I think they intend to make a room for him to be should be not want to be in the auditorium for services. Son#2 can't go because he is too loud & obviously is too big for the nursery so there's been no where to take him. If they follow through on this, our whole family may get to go to church together as a family which hasn't happened in years.

9. BE Cares campaign with Autism is allowing me to share my sons stories of Autism & how it's touched our lives & bring more people to use Bare Escentuals mineral makeup. (more to come)

10. The "baby", son#3, is saying "mommy" this week. I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One out of three ain't bad!

Ten Things Tuesday

Ten Things I'm Thankful For After Breaking My Ankle Saturday

1. A husband that doesn't mind picking up the house & doing laundry & knows how to get the kids ready for school.

2. My kids have been good--even poor #2 that's had medicine issues.

3. Hubbo's boss who let him off work for two days and lent us a "walking helper device" which
I refuse to call a walker. The kids refer to it as a stroller.

4. Friends that have called and checked on me through emails & Facebook. So sweet!

5. That danged deadly snow is gone.

6. New toenail polish. Purple to match my ankle.

7. Marathon tv shows on Bravo and A&E.

8. Magazines/books

9. KNITTING!!!

10. The treadmill. Without it, it's one long jump to the bathroom with nothing to hold on to.

Ten Things Tuesday

1. Company (in-laws) finally got to come visit this weekend!! We've been trying since Valentines weekend. All family members finally well on both sides.

2. Clean comedy. Brian Regan--- http://www.brianregan.com/

3. Spring Break is OVER!!!!!!!!

4. Son#2 is off his old meds & the tics have stopped. The new meds seem to be working although we're still working on doses which means there are times that aren't so fun. We're winning though!

5. Because Facebook has changed their format & style, it's not as user friendly. Wondering what I'm thankful for then? It's less addictive which means more time for other things.

6. My mom & aunts come tomorrow for a visit. We're going for Chinese & I think it's safe to say I won't have to entertain the baby much.

7. I'm in love with Philadelphia Cream Cheese Spreadable in the Spinach/Artichoke flavor. Coupled with a Ritz cracker, I'm in heaven!

8. One of the pluses from company coming to visit, your house gets cleaned.

9. Today was trash day so last night we cleaned out the fridge as a family by eating all leftovers for dinner. I love to kill two birds with one stone. Well, not really.

And #10--- I was able to be a part of something really fantastically fun, benefiting Autism. More on that later if you're NOT one of the millions I've already told.

Son#1 Journal

This is a throw back to February folks---enjoy the literal mind of son#1. Remember it's fill in the blank

When the groundhog sees it's shadow,it means 20 more weeks of winter. (when you think about it, this seems more true than the usual 6).

I want to have a party for, Christopher Council. We can play the Wii.

I wish I could build, a house that has computers in it. I use 2 computers.

If animals could talk, it would say: thank you. It would play with me. Animals always talk.

I was mean to someone when, I hit someone with a baseball bat. I told someone I am sorry. I was kind. (I really hope it was a Nerf bat. Surely the school would have called me right? I'm pretty sure they have a no tolerance policy for bullies.)

If there was no television, I would read a book. Then I would buy the TV. TV is fun.

I'll never eat, Cool Ranch Doritos. I like Nacho Cheese better. Nacho Cheese is cool.

Abraham Lincoln was, the 16th President. He freed the slaves. He was the 1st President to get shot down by John Wilkes Booth. (his teacher made sure we saw this one)

We celebrate George Washington's birthday because, he was the 1st President. He was the "father of our country". He was good.

I like to help my parents, get the van fixed. We took it to the car hospital. We took it home.

I'd love to learn how to play, the Wii. On the Wii I play Lego Star Wars 3.

This one is ALL him--even the parenthesis.
A movie I like to watch over & over is, Star Wars. I have 6 dvd's for 6 episodes. Star Wars is awesome. (includes disc 2 for 1,2 and 3 and IV, V and VI. Includes bonus discs.)

My favorite smell is, Germ-X. It is blueberry. It's good on my hands. (I had Sharpies, he has hand sanitizer. I wonder if that's considered "huffing"?)

If I could live in space, I would live on the moon. I would put a flag on there. I would see earth.

The snow is, good. I would play on the snow. I would build a snowman.

Spring Break-Day Five

11am
Son#2 crying, wants to go somewhere, brings me clothes. Trying to get three kids half dressed to go to the bank. Fun--NOT. Van battery dead. Son#2 was in the garage the other day with the door open. Hubbo came home, shut the door thinking it hadn't been open long. Guess it was open longer than we thought.

11:40am
Do you hear that? It's glee in my "voice" as I type.
Nothing can get me down...(knock on wood) because in approximately 5 and a half hours, I have back up until school starts. There is nothing so lonely for me as Spring Break & Christmas break. Sometime I'll tell you about the frantic, tense pace that exists all day with the three boys all home & how utterly exhausting it is. But right now, I'm gonna go "celebrate the moments of my life" with a little Cafe Vienna.

1pm
Son#2 didn't eat his mac & cheese, he wanted MY lunch. Figures. And the remote is missing...it was here just a few minutes ago.

2pm
Son#3 has outgrown naps. Is there any justice in this world!?

Spring Break-Day Four

8:30am
Two out of three up. Son#1 bugging me to get up. For some reason he needs me
To get out of bed so he can start his day.

9:30am
Baby gets up happy and with no fever and no cough. Yay!
I'm choosing not to give son#2 any mess today to see if the
Tics stop. Although I reserve the right to change my mind at any time
today. The thought of no meds needed--wow. But like the house
I won't get my hopes up just yet.

10:30am
Do you hear that? Angels singing. I've heard an angel gets his wings
when a mommy gets a shower.
Son#2 has a thing with long hair lately and if it's wet, well
That's even better. He keeps coming up behind as I type
and smelling my hair.


11:30am
Son#2 needs pill. That didn't last long. At least one pill seems to be doing it for the whole day & we're not using anything for bedtime.

7pm
The realtor has another client with a daugther with Autism. She is thinking of moving to our town. She asked for permission to give her my info so I could fill her in on our school system & Autism programs here. She called--I talked for an hour & a half about the pros. She said a developmental Peds dr had once told her if she was considering our school system, she might as well keep her kids home. Boy did I refute THAT! Keith Olberman here I come!!!!!!!!

Spring Break-Day Three

Day Three--HUMP DAY!----

8:30am
Hubbo on his way home from the store & getting a new tire for the car.

9:30am
Wake baby, poor guy has a runny nose like a faucet & a cough to boot. Medicine for the whole room on the house!

11am
Baths for #2 & #3. Not much space left in the tub for toys, so they got creative bringing in the bathmat with them.

11:30am
Realtor calls, house decision still up in the air. Wheee!

Noon
Lunch---why is it all the kids only what I'm eating? Even when I feed them first? I'm getting sick of food. 4 breakfasts--if I get one. Four lunches & 2 different dinners. Son#1 has chosen now to go on a growing spurt & eat us out of house & home. Right when son#2 goes off the meds that make him want seconds & thirds. Our grocery bill may never be the same.

2:12pm
Part of what is trying my patience is I can't open the fridge or unlock the pantry without one of them being behind me sneaking things out. Drives me insane! That and son#2's meds make him a tad manic at times. This means constant turning off of the light switches in rooms, shutting doors, handing you everything you never wanted or asked for as well emptying drawers & throwing clothes around the house. Specifically in corners & behind tv cabinets.

I might need TWO blood pressure pills today.
After yesterday's poop incident & the baby's cold or whatever, we're not venturing outside. It's 80 degrees already & it's a playdough, marker/coloring day instead.

Spring Break-Day Two

Day Two:

8:45am
I'm up & doing dishes before any of the younger ones are up to "help". Son #1 is in the living room loudly playing Wii. Of course he left the bedroom door open. Can't believe son#2 didn't wake up.
Son#3 slept till 9:30am--slight fever last night, runny nose & phlemy cough. Off to vacuum...

10:30am
Med time. Son#2's new med, slipped into a spoonful of blueberry applesauce. You have to strategically place it so that he doesn't scrape it off the spoon with his teeth or the jigs up.
Son#1's you have to crush, crush again, melt in a tablespoon of water, then down the hatch with 7-Up. Although today he had to settle for diet Sierra Mist & he wasn't too happy. But it's one of those days he's complaining about EVERYTHING. Son#3 usually gets his in a syringe but decided today he was just too big for that now that he's three years old. He wanted his medicine on a spoon like big brother. I guess he really is growing up.

3:15pm
Corned beef, cabbage, potatoes in the oven for dinner. Son#3 in crib still yelling "Mom" since 1:30pm. Son#2 got in the fridge & ate the rest of the birthday cake with his hands.
Countdown to reinforcements--2 hrs.

4:03pm
Are you kidding me? Son#3 still yelling at me from his bed. Which I really don't understand because he had children's Tylenol 5 hours ago.
And apparently, one day without a poo incident goes against every Murphy's law there is for me in life.
Son #2 running around outside in the 80 degree day, eventually stripped down & the few minutes I wasn't watching him, pooped outside my bedroom window. Without a pull-up on. I thought little boys just liked to pee on things outside. Sigh. I don't care how warm it is the rest of this week, we may never go outside again.

Spring Break--Day One

Day One--11am

Well, we already have poo people. Within 30 minutes of getting up I had not only a poopy diaper, but I got it all over my arm. I take a shower, feel all clean, ready to start my day--pretend that poopy diaper never happened. But I kept smelling poo. Check kitchen, not only is the floor an array of cow patties, somehow, some way, there is poo on my oven door! How in the heck are the physics of that possible?

10:50am
We leave in the van to go meet Hubbo at work to sign some papers on the house. This involves snacks in ziplocks, cups for everyone, a Nintendo DS, a koosh ball and some Lego guys. Oh and did I mention son#2 won't stay in his seatbelt? Since we got the van he's discovered how to let himself out of his seatbelt. We acquired these bad boys.
Hopefully this will dissuade him, although on the way back, he unbuckled his brothers seatbelt to the carseat. Good thing these came in twos.

4:30pm
Playing outside, let's hope son#2 keeps his clothes on. All of them.

All in all, today wasn't that bad. No major meltdowns & mommy's still sane. Score one for the hometeam!

Ten Things Tuesday

1. The baby has been really ill with a high fever since Saturday evening. I'm thankful today he seems a little more like himself. Less glassy eyed. He's more like a colt trying to learn to walk but at least he has more pep today & NO fever.

2. I'm thankful that as of today, my husband has a job. I know that in this economy that's precious and hopefully even though his company is slow with business lately, he'll keep it.

3. Dr. Pepper has finally made a CHERRY DR. PEPPER! (and diet) without vanilla! They sure
took long enough but I'm just happy it's finally here!

4. Vicks nose inhalers. The weather here has been cold, then 80 degrees, then 17. The rest of this week it's picking back up to the 70's & such. My sinuses don't know whether to believe me that winters really over.

5. I'm very thankful I found the missing DVD-R remote yesterday!! It's been missing several months and I've missed recording things as easily. Oh who am I kidding, I make Hubbo do all that.

6. And I'm thankful that my sister-in-law and her family, can STILL try on our fifth weekend of trying, to come down & see us. Hopefully. Knock on wood.

7. Magazines. I love a good thumb-through. Has kept me sane with all the fever watching around here lately.

8. Federal tax returns on e-file.

9. A quick lunch out with a friend Saturday since I missed mine with the family.

10. Prayers that are answered.

Have You Ever Had One of THOSE Days?

Have you ever had one of those days, not even necessarily bad, where you're so busy that at the end of the day you want to burn your clothes? Where it feels like you lived a week in them all in one day? You never want to see them again. Not even the socks.

Ten Things Tuesday

It's been awhile since I've done this, but someone reminded me of that today. And when things are hectic or crazy stressful and I don't feel in the mood to write what I'm thankful for, I just want to complain, and that's the time to truly take count of one's blessings right? So here ya go Sarah!

1. I'll lead off with the obvious, this week has contained MANY less diapers containing bio hazards. For that, I am TRULY, TRULY thankful.

2. I had a wonderful time this weekend spending a great deal of Fri night & Saturday with friends. I hadn't had much of that this month & boy did I miss it. I think my soul has come to count on it. We laughed, ate and scrap booked. But we also really got to talk and get into each others issues that were weighing on our hearts. Somehow even when your husband is your best friend, it always feels so good to say the same things out loud to a girlfriend. Being of the same sex, you really believe them when they say they understand or have been there. It validates your feelings & somehow takes away that feeling that occasionally creeps in that you're living with an alien.

3. I'm thankful for finding www.verseoftheday.com where God guides me and my problems daily. It's like a horoscope for your soul.

4. I have much more "things" than I've ever had in a home. Today I'm going to choose to be thankful I have all these blessings instead of complain for the millionth time about where all this stuff came from.

5. Sonic's Raspberry Tea---my newest addiction. I believe God sent it to me to get me through the rough patches like he sent Elijah mana.

6. My "Mama Mia" soundtrack. It is such a pick-me up! It really gets me happy and I love each & every song. Even the song Pierce Broson sings is growing on me.

7. Green bean casserole. I made this tonight because son#2 loves it. We really only have it on holidays & this year I don't think we had it at all. We're trying to keep him on a non-dairy diet & non-spicy foods until his intestines pick back up to normal. Not only did he love it, I think it was a little comfort food for the soul for me too. Isn't it funny how sometimes tasting a certain food can almost bring you back to a different place in time? My Grandma Bible used to have THE best Thanksgiving spread.

8. I got a mani/pedi last week the day before Valentines day & the virus started. It felt great to sit there & zone out and let the massage chair just work it's magic. All by myself.

9. Sour Cream & Onion Lays--green chips as son#1 calls them. I have never really been excited by sour cream & onion chips. But now, I am truly wanting to suck the coating off these and could eat a family sized bag myself. Not that I WOULD mind you...

10. My roommate is pretty darn good at laundry & diapers, not to mention cleaning up the bio hazard materials. I was thankful he & I stayed well this past week and that he stayed home to help out three days. I wouldn't trade him for anything.

Well....unless you happen to have a Sonic raspberry tea and green Lays.;)

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

Things here have been rather crazy the past few weeks. The kids woke up sick on Valentines day and the baby & son#2 still are showing signs of it in the rear end area. Son#2 hasn't been to school since Feburary 13th. Luckily Hubbo was home 3 out of 5 days last week helping take care of kids & save my sanity. Also, son#1 keeps running a low-grade mystery fever at night. No symptoms, then it's gone by morning.

I called the doctor today after trying to send son#2 to school and then picking him up ill, nurse said there is something called Florastor Kids that you can get at the drug store for sprinkling on their foods. It is a pro-biotic & restores the good bacteria that this virus has caused the intestines to sweep away with the bad. Hopefully, the stench will find it's way to a different house soon too. I never knew we could run out of Wal-Mart sacks but last time I went to the store Hubbo told me to bag everything seperately.

In other news, son#3 shocked himself Saturday night. When we heard him scream and son#1 start screaming "Don't let me brother burn to death!" we came running. Always a dead give-away something is wrong I think. Son#3 had a black mark on his hand where his thumb meets his palm and some black marks on the ends of his fingers. I checked him over really good, and washed the black mark off--no burn luckily. After a call to Nana, we deemed him okay. I think he got over it faster than son#1 did. We assumed this is what happened: Son#2 likes to chew cords but we have NEVER caught him chewing the lamp in the living room before. Apparently he had, and when son#3 went to plug it in, it zapped him. Son#1 said he heard a loud pop & the baby started crying & holding his hand. The next day we found through an open window near the lamp, son#2 had thrown the plug part of the lamp outside. It had come off with the pop. I don't think son#3 will be plugging anything in for awhile.

Today I thought it was too quiet, went to check son#2 and son#3 today, nowhere to be found in the house. I finally saw the key in the backdoor. Son#2 has gotten tall enough & smart enough to find the key on the top shelf, get it down & put it in the back door. The little hoodlums were out there running around half naked! Son#3 was in a t-shirt & pull-up, barefoot and son#2 was just in a pull-up jumping in the trampoline. FORTY degrees outside!

We did get our van back & all the tags, titles and papers are in order. Now I'm waiting for the cleaning fairies to come to my garage in the middle of the night so we can move around the van in there better. Although, today while on the way to the bank, son#2 discovered how to unbuckle himself in the van. Little easier than the car I guess. He was out & out again. I kept pulling over & re-buckling him. Then at the bank I just let him up front so I could moniter the buckle situation. But that posed new issues. He could obviously reach the door handle, locks & windows if he wanted. While I was worrying about all that, he figured that gear shift sticking out was different than the car & looked like it'd make a good thing to yank on. I had to get pretty stern with him because obviously we don't want the NEW transmission just falling out down the road while we're driving along. Then he found it hilarious to reach over & play with the steering wheel, pick at me and slap at the gear shift some more. I barely got home. Front seat, NOT working, not even in an emergency. SO, we're about to order some seatbelt locks that are designed to guard the vehicle seat belt release button from the fingers of special needs children or adults with cognitive disabilities such as ADD, Angelman Syndrome, Alzheimers, Autism, etc. www.buckleboss.com

I really have to say I'm looking forward to the end of this month, shhh we must not even utter it's name. Bad juju. March is looking really good right now. Bring on the tornados & snow!!

Fun, Cool & Cute-Adjectives of a 10 year old

This is son#1's January Journal for school. They are fill in the blanks--his answers are in bold.


Before winter is over I want to play in the snow. I like to build a snow man. It was good.

If I saw a mouse in my house I would be it's friend. I will feed him food and drink. He is cool.

My favorite gift of all time is Lego Star Wars 3, the Complete Saga. Matt got that for me. It was fun.

An animal I'm afraid of is nothing. I like animals. They are cute.

If I had a magic wand I would make a bunny appear. I will also make Lego Darth Vader appear. The hat is cool.

I wish my school had a playground. I would swing. School is cool. (his school does have swings)

When someone is crying I say what is it? I would give her a toy. She likes it.

On my birthday I blow out candles. I open my presents. My birthday is fun.

Martin Luther King Jr is special because he had a dream. He had an idea. He made a new way.

If you could ask the new President to do something, what would it be? Keep the earth clean.

If I had a hundred dollars I would buy Lego guys. It will go with all Legos. I'd take them home.

Valentines Thoughts

For the boys I bought two types of valentines---3D dog/cats and then some from the movie Cars--those came with pencils. Of course I thought it was perfect that the Cars valentines came with pencils with RED erasers (son#1's fav color) and since son#2's class likes tactile, the 3D zippy ones for him. Son#1 hates addressing them so I always end up writing everything but his name. And what does he tell me, that he doesn't WANT the Cars valentines, he wants the dogs & cats. Sigh!

But here's my real beef---why do manufacturers make packets of Valentines in different numbered packs??

Does that make sense to you? My kids classes are a tad smaller than the norm & I realize that. But why do I end up with a pack of 24 and a pack of 16?? I ended up just using the dog/cat ones & had enough for BOTH boys classes and teachers with some leftover. Now I have 4 leftover valentines in that pack. What am I supposed to DO with them??? FOUR? Why not just make ALL valentine packs in the same number? If you need 25....you have to buy one whole other pack just to get enough and then you have a lot of leftovers you can't recycle next year. Talk about major faux pas! So you throw them away?

I propose we have grab bag type Valentines. Sort of like those little $.25 bags of chips? Shoot valentines are cheap already--35 for $2! They could be like cold medicine--put them behind the counter . That way you can get what you want. And then you can also get exactly the number you need. And you have to show your drivers license to get to the good ones. Maybe even someone to evaluate whether THAT'S the card your wife would like. Might save men some trouble.

All I know is by the time my kids are out of valentine giving age, I'll have enough hodge podge valentines to give one to everyone in their college classes!

Ten Things Tuesday

1. The ice came & although it stuck around for 4 days or so, and I'm thankful to say we kept power. Which is more than I can say for some of my friends in Arkansas. We even got some temps this weekend up in the 60's, however we still have ice in the shade that's still thick & not melting.

2. I'm thankful that the kids FINALLY went back to school this week. They only went last Monday & Friday. We were all getting cabin fever.

3. Saturday my mom slipped on the ice getting up on the curb, but thankfully she's alright. Nothing broken. She softened the fall with her face though.

4. January 2009 is OVER. I would ask for a do-over for such a crappy month, but I really don't wish to repeat much of anything that happened last month. Seriously, 90% of people I know had not so great January 2009's also. I think we should all be thankful the month is over & we're moving on. Onward & upward!

5. I've probably said this before, but I'm thankful for Facebook. This past week I've found several girls I went to church with growing up, and it's been a welcome surprise. Last night at bookclub the older ladies were discussing how as years go on, more people die that knew you when you were younger--knew your history. Remembered you as child. They tried to tell me and another "youngun" that we didn't understand. But I think because of Facebook, I do! It has been an uplifting thing for me to find not only my first Sunday school teacher, but also people who knew me growing up and in grade school, high school, and college. I think it comforts me, cheers me and makes me a tad happier. Maybe that's because as a mother or just someone that recently turned 34 years old, I myself, even forget who I was before this life I lead now. I used to take gymnastics, I sang in many choirs, and I loved playing dolls. I could swim forever, and I could climb a tree pretty well. Finding these people who knew me then, sort of makes me feel like that part of me ISN'T forgotten. It's a good feeling.

6. The van is getting a new transmission that we aren't paying for. And we'll hopefully have it this week. Thank you Lord!

7. I've had some friends (as I mentioned, January wasn't kind) with children that have had some issues lately. I'm thankful, so thankful that they are getting answers & healing. I hate seeing or hearing about children suffering. Not to mention the parental end of that worry. Boy can that stress out the ol' ticker.

8. I'm thankful for our trip to Wal-Mart Friday night as a whole family went well & was uneventful. Son#2 wanted to push the cart the whole time, son#3 rode in the cart & son#1 skipped through the whole store. Yep--good cure for cabin fever. They got to spend some Christmas gift cards and had new things to occupy them till Monday.

9. Son#1 has a school play tonight. They also peformed today for the whole school. I mistakenly told him this morning to break a leg. Sometimes even I forget how literal he is. Luckily he let me explain that I just meant good luck. Whew! Don't worry, I'm sure the dvd of tonights performance will provide lots of blog fodder.

10. Friday is Hubbo's birthday. We won't say which one, but it's about four years ahead of mine. So tonight since Nana is here to babysit, after the kids go to bed, we're heading out on our first movie alone together in, well.....years. I'm VERY thankful we get to go see the same movie at the same time. A date you could say! (Usually we go see a movie the same day, different times-- taking turns watching the kids.)

Martin Luther King Jr Day

The kids are out of school today to celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. #1 son has only been excited because it means he doesn't have to go to school. This morning he woke up & he was confirming there was indeed no school today. Here's the conversation:

son#1: "No school today. It's Martin Lubber King Jr day."

me: "That's right."

son#1: "We love Martin Lubber King Jr."

me: "Yes we do. You do know he's dead though right?"

son#1: "He is?"

me: " Yeah he lived quite awhile ago. What DO you know about Martin Luther King Jr?"

son#1: "He was a President?"

me: "Nope--a preacher."

son#1: "Well, Martin Lubber King Jr wasn't allowed to do things other people were. He wasn't allowed to eat Doritos like the other kids. He couldn't even eat any Classic Lays. He had to eat the black* and green* ones. They were very mean to him. And now, because of Martin Lubber King Jr, I can eat the yellow Lays or any other color if I want. But I don't like the sour cream and onion. And I'd be sad if I had to eat them and not the Classic Lays."

me: "Yeah he wasn't allowed to do a lot of the same things other people were because of the color of his skin. Martin Luther King Jr was someone who fought for civil rights."

son#1: "I know. I said I don't have to eat the sour cream & onion if I don't want to."

me: *sigh*

*black Lays--BBQ
*green Lays--Sour Cream & Onion

So Are the Days of Our Lives

I have plenty to be thankful for today, but instead I'll just give you the drama we had around here last week.
What you need to know beforehand is Hubbo was in a car accident March of 08. One rainy night turning into our subdivision, someone rear ended him. He was fine, we took pictures but unfortunately I had to spend a lot of time hounding Progressive (the lady that hit him's insurance) that we wanted to get our car fixed, not total it out. And we did accept a settlement from them, got our car fixed & moved on--after much hassle.

After Christmas we realized we never got our card in the mail saying we needed to get our car tag for 09 on the car. Hubbo comes home worried one night thinking it has to do with his car accident. I start to worry. I called tag agency in our town thenext morning and they said just bring in insurance card. Then I start to worry that maybe the non-English speaking lady didn't understand the issues. It IS complicated. So I wait & call back after lunch. SAME LADY. She runs my license plate # & says it's junked, can't drive it, can't sell it, can't get tags. "Park it, you no drive anymore."

I called our State Farm agent because I knew she spoke English & I could explain everything to her. She checks with someone, comes back & says get Progressive to give us a letter saying it's repaired/salvaged, take it to OK Tax Commision & get new tag.

I call Progressive girl Amber we worked with before, she says she doesn't know. Calls a tag agency they work with, says it IS junked. Can't get title, drive it, tag etc. Say I COULD call Tax Comm & explain & see what they say the options are. But offers if we have to get rid of it b/c we can't drive it, they'd pay us $479 for salvage & come get it. Said we can't even trade it in when we go get a new car/mini-van. Lovely. The car looks brand new. No dents, no cracked glass anywhere. We've BEEN driving it since March of 08!

So I just called Tax Commision they say IF, Progressive made a mistake on the percentage of totaled (60-79% is salvage, over 80% of the value of the car is junked--ours 81% ) car, then send a letter saying that to us. We could then take letter & car to tag agency, they inspect car, give new tag. Otherwise, if Progressive says it's STILL 81% then it's junked & we can't drive it when tag expires at end of Jan. Even though it runs, no duct tape, has heat/air and looks fine.

We've been waiting to get a second car until after we find a house. We've been searching for the house since May. We knew if we got a second car beforehand, it'd be on our credit and with our student loans (thanks Harding!) on there, we don't need ANY help weighing on our credit to get home loan. So now it looked like barring a miracle, we'll HAVE to get a new car before the end of January. Again, barring a miracle or $10-15,000 somewhere dropping out of the sky...I was thinking 2009 was off to a rocky start for us.

Okay---so the next day I spent the entire day on the phone AGAIN. This time I got some higher up people and made some progress.
I got ahold of The OK Insurance Comm. who sent me back to the OK Tax Comm. There I got ahold of a nice woman that told me that this all didn't sound right, and she asked to call in a higher up. I said BE MY GUEST! I'm not sure how high up she went.
I was on hold a good 5 minutes. Kent (the higher up) comes on the phone and already knows the story. Which I thought was nice of her not to make re-tell it for the millionth time in two days.

He says he understands completely because in Nov of 2008 a law was passed being more specific about what "junked" means in our state. So NOW, he at the Tax Comm had big problems because in two months he had accumulated two huge stacks of cases from Progressive Insurance. He said they were cases like ours where the cars were not totaled & if repaired, were driveable but couldn't get tags because they were labeled junked. That those should be given a letter to get a "Salvage for Title". With that we can't sell the car, but we can get a tag & drive it. Which is all we wanted!

Kent hadn't been able to get ahold of this Rebecca from Progressive that signs off on them all in two months. No one at Progressive wanted to give out her extension number. Apparently she gives a 1-888 number but no extension which he says is the polite way of saying, "Just TRY & get ahold of me." Kent said if I could get ahold of Rebecca at Progressive, we could all talk & he thought he could make her see the error of the way they were doing things. He was anxious to work with me since it meant clearing off stacks of cases off his desk. And he'd been trying to catch her for two months.
Thanks to my sister-in-law, I got what I thought was Rebecca's number but turned out to be Amber's at Progressive--the agent we'd been working with for a year now. Amber DID however, call Rebecca & she and Kent did a three-way conference call.

Kent explained he had all these cases with Rebecca's name on it and he wasn't able to get ahold of her for two months now. She said, of course, I sign off on all claims from OK. (Did I mention she's in OHIO?) Kent said they were very defensive at first, not wanting to accept any blame. He explained the law, explained the piles of cases on his desk. How, if it was their teenagers car that was not TOTALED, but repairable and then driveable, then you can't label it junked. People need to get back on the roads!

Rebecca had a light-bulb moment and gasped, "I have to send out an emergency memo to ALL agents in OK correcting how we do things!" Then Kent nicely pointed out she could write US a letter of correction telling the tag agency to give us a Title for Salvage so we could get a tag, OR, he Kent, could send a memo out to HIS whole state of Oklahoma saying that Progressive won't cooperate with them, so we won't issue tags or titles to their customers.
*Someone pointed out to me they had already seen a sign like that at a tag agency in OK recently.*

Guess what? Rebecca decided that it was more benefical to start with our case to declare a correction. Amber called me shortly after apologizing & stating the letter will be mailed out directly to our house & confirmed our address. Kent mentioned to them he didn't need it sent to him, to save time, send it directly to us. And Amber said if I didn't get it by the 19th to let her know. Kent also said, he was giving me his personal number so when I got the letter, take it to a tag agency and show them the letter & have them call him directly. He would log on to the computer & make sure they issued me a tag and title for salvage NOT JUNKED. WHEW! God answered the prayers!

I feel vindicated, and validated that it was common sense that this wasn't right. And to be honest, I'm thrilled that that it worked out for us, but think about the other people who's cases have been sitting on Kent's desk for two months? I just had to worry for 2 days, I'm hoping it helps them out too. I'm just thrilled it's over since I think it took some years off my life & I'm pretty sure gave me some gray hairs.

Ten Things Tuesday

1. School has resumed. Do you hear that? It's called peace & quiet. What? Oh that? That sound is my blood pressure going down a few points.

2. My house is clean, dishes all done, dinner in the crockpot and laundry in the washer.

3. Three-fourths of the Christmas decorations are put away. The tree may not make it back to the garage. It's on it's last legs. Getting rid of it, sounds so much more appealing than restoring it at this point.

4. The weather is still cold. I know, I'm in the minority but I'm happy with winter as long as no power is lost & roads are safe.

5. Book club was wonderful last night. I needed that. Apparently Ms. Evelyn that I sat next to last night, let us in on the fact that the man who calls to tell you your books are in, has a sexy voice and great diction. (Evelyn is 84 years old and I think her memory is better than mine.)

6. I'm loving my birthday present. It's been a sanity saver the last couple of weeks. And to be honest, it's all mine, no one elses. Not many things fall into that category when you're a mommy.(Hubbo got me an iPod Touch)

7. I'm thankful for Facebook so I can keep up with family members & friends that don't live close by.

8. I finally got pretty close on a recipe that Hubbo wanted recreated from his youth. Tasted pretty good too. If you know Taco Time restuarants, I think I have a pretty good Crisp Meat burrito recipe. Although I'm still fooling around with which cheese is best.

9. Sounds weird but I'm so pleased son#1 isn't obessed with his Nintendo DS he got for Christmas. I was hoping he wouldn't turn into that kid that runs into you in the store because they aren't watching where they are going.

10. One of my resolutions this New Years is that my knitting projects this year, will be only be what I want to knit. and the majority will be for ME! I'm thankful for that--truly!:)

Ten Things Tuesday, er...Wednesday

1. My kids were all three thrilled with their presents. It's hard to please a non-verbal 8 yr old, but I think we did pretty good this year. Except the fish we got died already...we won't speak of this anymore.

2. I was indulged for my birthday & it lasted over several days off and on. Maybe there are good points to having a birthday on Monday after all.

3. There was no stress for food prep during Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. I planned and stuck to the plan. Who knew that actually worked? And an extra shout out to Ore Ida frozen russet potatos. Those things are worth their weight in gold to not have to peel and boil them. Steam in the bag ten minutes, then mash. Easiest real mashed potatos ever!

4. Much pie was consumed. Birthday, pumpkin and chocolate. I love pie.

5. My gifts to my neices and nephews were a huge hit! From real tiara's to a remote controlled monster Jeep.

6. My ears don't ache which is grand! Now if they'll just pop I'd be on cloud nine. Hmm Cloud Nine pie still in the fridge....

7. Two days of Christmas break the kids were able to get outside for a whole afternoon. They jumped, swung (is that right?) and son#2 even found some mud to befriend all over his body.

8. I got a Christmas card from one of the only people I haven't found from high school. She and I were so close, I can't wait now to really reconnect!

9. I got out to the mall this past weekend (yes on purpose) with a friend for girl time. We banded together since we each go maybe once a year. Sadly we spent a good deal of time in Sears because we're both old. But we had a blast and I enjoyed the time away from my kids.

10. The baby still naps. It's my saving grace for 5 more days till school starts again.

From My Husband

For my birthday today, my husband hid presents around the house for me to liven up the day since I would be home with all the kids on a regular ol' Monday. This is the card he picked and I think it's my favorite present because it pretty sums us up.


For My Wife

You know the story.
Two people meet and fall in love,
they move all their belongings
into the same small place
and begin to make a life together.

They discover that they have three toasters,
two blenders, and not even one coffeemaker.
They don't fold their shirts the same way,
and they can't always agre on
whose turn it is to clean house.

But these are the little things,
and because these two people love each other
they find a way to work them out.
As time passes, there are other things--
money worries, illnesses, family crises.
These are the big things.
But because the two people love each other,
they find a way to work them out, too.

And on special days like birthdays,
they think about each other
and about all the fun stuff they share
and about how their love has
got them through the not-so-fun stuff.

And he says to her...
"Thanks for everything. I still love you very much."

Autism 101

When you have an Autistic person in your life it's a little hard for even the people closest to you, to understand fully what your life is like. And sometimes it's even more akward to ask how you manage certain things as a family. People feel shy about asking these things and it's understandable. Not many of us would say to someone that's lost their limb, "How did you loose your leg?" even though we may really be wanting to know so that we can better understand that person's life issues. Education, in my opinion, is power. Whether it's a friend or loved one, knowing the story behind an injury, loss or disease, gives you the compassion to understand that persons life struggles. Everyone has them, ours just may be a little different & new to you.

As a new idea for the blog, I thought I'd ask my friends random times throughout the months, to give me a few questions. Anything easy or difficult about our lives with the boys and how Autism affects us as a family. Then I will answer as honestly & plainly as possible. And if you don't know me, then I should tell you I'm pretty honest & don't do well at hiding things, so you WILL get an honest answer from me. I'm not a doctor, but I do have a degree in Child Development. But I consider myself to have my Masters in it now as well. After ten years parenting two Autistic children, I feel I deserve at least that right?;)

I also hope in months to come, that any of you that know us or even those that don't, will feel free to ask anything you would like to know. Don't worry if it's too personal, I'll let you know if it's something that I don't feel like sharing at this point in time. Now I will warn you, these questions are directed at ME, they will have answers about MY family. So please do not feel you need to compare my children & their progress to yours. If it's one thing we DO know about Autism, it's that all the children on the spectrum & their cases are very individual & different. And if you feel that what you're reading is "wrong" or I say something you don't agree with, stop reading & find yourself a new blog that you do agree with. It'll be a lot less bothersome to us both I promise.

This week my friend Lisa, who I've known since college, gave me some questions and I think they are great for starting this idea off right. Thank you Lisa for taking the time & having the interest to help me out.



1. When and how did you first find out your son's were autistic? Did anything "tip you off" as a parent?

This is a very common question actually. And I think it's the one people feel most comfortable asking. When son#1 was a baby there were things we noticed. Things that caught our attention but never alarmed us. We just waited until the next doctor appointment to ask about it. One was even by 6 months old, he never wanted to hold his own bottle. But you push that aside & say "What a lazy baby! Isn't that cute?" He also flapped his hands if excited and did walk on his tip toes. (those are sort of universal signs now) He hated anything new and would cry and place his hands over his ears if we went new places or loud places. Two examples of that are as follows.

Once when son#1 was about 9 months, we went to a high school football game outside. We made the mistake of sitting by the band. Bad idea. Son#1 flipped out crying & covering his ears and we had to leave.
Also, when he was older, about 4 yrs old, we moved to a new town & tried to attend a new church. He wasn't used to that building & cried, covered his ears and wailed. This to most people sounds like a temper tantrum, you spank them and make them do it. He put his hands on either side of the door & grabbed on and wouldn't let go. He never let go till we said we'd leave. He screamed at the top of his lungs, shaking all over and scared. You could see he wasn't just being a bratty kid. He was terrified of the new place. Too much stimulation, sensory overload. Too much for his brain to take in & process. Most of us use our brain, eyes, ears, nose etc to take in a new place & process it. Son#1 (and most Autistic kids) a visual learners, it was just too much. Like a circuit shorting out, he would have a meltdown.

Son#1 never babbled a lot or pointed at things. But I remember right before he was 18 months old, we went on a trip. He stayed with my parents and when we returned my mother mentioned he was saying baby. Son#1 had 5-6 words then. Soon after that trip, we did get the MMR shot. I just can look back & see he stopped using those few words & didn't speak again until he was 4 yrs old. The not talking, was a huge sign & that's when we sought out a doctor.
Talking to the doctor, she gave a diagnosis & we love her for being aware, it took us awhile to find her, and that she was informed about such things was a God-send. This was all so new in 1998-99. It wasn't the epidemic proportion it is now. It was just the beginning of all that.

Son#2 we were watching from day one. And the only different thing we noticed about him, was that he walked on his tip toes. (both walked early at 7-8 months) However, son#2 never spoke or babbled either. And now, he babbles, but still doesn't use words to communicate & he is 8 yrs old.


2. Sometimes friends don't know how to act or feel awkward when they discover a child is autistic. What do you recommend they do?

Umm, this is a bit more difficult to answer. Each person I encounter is so different in their personality. Some are blunt, some are so gentle & tactful, others are good at ignoring issues. I think everyone needs to do what they are comfortable with, but know that the person you're asking questions to, has their own personality also. Some only let you in so far, and other parents might be shy, upset, reserved or just relieved you cared enough to ask a question.

I'd go with how well you know the person. Get a feeling, a reading off the person. Are they relaxed? Then just be yourself. If they're uptight, look for ways to maybe help if you think that's what they need--maybe just pick up a toy that got dropped for the hundredth time. Or if they seem uptight and you see them focused & in their own world, sometimes it's better to just not add to any issues that may be going on at the time. But I think it's always good to reach out to parents whenever it looks to be a good, approachable situation. Let them know you're not scared off by their kids issues. And you can do that by just treating them like any other friend. Email them if you're worried about catching them at a bad time, or call & leave messages. Actions speak louder than words.

Maybe ask them when you see them, when a good time to call and catch up with them is. That way if there is a routine they adhere to (which I bet there is in most Autistic homes) you can avoid disrupting that therefore ensuring you get to really talk to your friend.

Around the children, I'd be yourself, don't touch or come into their space unless they approach you first. Remember all those rules about a stray dog? Sort of the same thing. You don't know this child or their issues they struggle with. Don't touch them, don't do anything to taunt them like offering food in front of them or offering candy (again, you don't know their diet or what they like/dislike--but you should ask the parent, they'd be happy for you to engage their child & will most likely tell you the way to do so). And don't get in their space unless they make the first move, you don't want to scare them. My sons are very affectionate but son#1 will tell perfect strangers he loves them when they meet him for the first time. However, son#2 does not want you in his personal space unless he comes around to "sniff" you out. Oh, and they can smell fear. Just kidding. Sort of. I think son#2 really can sense when someone isn't comfortable and it puts him at ill ease and then problems can start.

And perhaps it's good to remember there is a fine line between pity & compassion.

3. What are your thoughts about the whole Jenny McCarthy my-child-was-cured-of-autism story?

Well, here is where I might offend some people, but you asked my opinion and this is MY blog, so here goes. I read her first book on her son when it came out. It's always very interesting to me to hear about other stories of how Autism touched their life. I knew Jenny McCarthy was divorced, I wanted to know if that was a result of the diagnosis. The divorce rate among parents of Autistic parents is 80%. I wanted to know as someone with unlimited (so I thought) resources, if there was something I was missing out on to help my children. And I'm nosy. I love biographies anyway so this was a chance to peek into a celebrity's life and one who may have some of the same issues we have at our house.

First, she is a great story teller. I laughed, I cried and I learned some things about Autism I didn't know. Some things my sons never had to deal with. It was interesting. Hubbo read it. There were answers to questions we have for someone parenting Autistic children. Yes, those of us living with the disease in our home have questions for other parents too, it's probably just easier for us to ask them.

I did not read her second book. The one with "cure" in the title. I did watch her on Oprah, I did see many other interviews with Jenny McCarthy. I just got the impression (after watching her on the Oprah show) that she felt the need to cure her child of Autism. I'm not judging her motives, I think they are genuine. She is a loving mother. I just don't know that I believe any child with Autism is cured yet. Functioning on a MUCH higher level than before due to something that worked for them, YES. Now, I realize some eyebrows just went up. YES, of course I want my children cured too. I hope there is a cure, so my children can have babies without the worry of passing on this disease. But I live every day to the fullest, knowing my children will not die from Autism. There are so many other worse physical problems my children could have. We don't have it easy, but it's not the hardest road we could be walking down in life & we're fully aware of that.

I personally don't believe there is a cure yet. I think I've seen a few kids (that I know personally) do so much better in their strive for normalcy, from things like diet or therapies. That's wonderful! Thank God for that. I have seen son#1 go from not speaking and utter frustration to a verbal, high-functioning ten year old that is pretty darn smart. Even his social skills are improving daily. He's acting more like a pre-teen every day in fact. That pleases me & gives me less worry than when he was smaller. But I don't believe that even if son#2 talks tomorrow, he's cured. There are things they live with daily that will probably always be there--even if to the average person they act "normal". Each child on this spectrum is so very, very different, that I do not believe there is one cure for everyone to drink & be well. I pray there's a cure in my children's lifetime, and I hope that includes isolating the gene so it's not passed on.

Eleven Things Tuesday

1. Hubbo doesn't have pneumonia, he has bronchitis. Lesser of two evils.

2. A hot rice bag & Midol

3. We have central heat.

4. Son#2 stayed at school all day Monday.

5. Bunco & the many gifts it gives. Friends, fun, food & real gifts.

6. Hubbo brought me a doughnut & Frappuccino this morning.

7. My new toaster

8. Salvation Army who is coming Wednesday to pick up a ton of stuff.

9. My tree is up, even if it is listing to the side.

10. Cable television--so there was something on to watch when I was up at 2am.

11. That son#1 didn't really have a girl in his room at age 10, when the other morning first thing I hear is:
"Where's that woman that was in my bed last night? She's missing."

Turned out to be the little mom figure from a playset. Whew!

Ten Things Tuesday

1. Thanksgiving went as well as we could have hoped. It went by in a flash and then there was son#2 running down the road flashING. I guess sometimes we just have to embrace the warm weather in November & do apparently what comes naturally.

2. I got to see my cousins & their kids/husbands & baby on the way. One cousin home from the Air Force & others in from Virginia/Pentagon. All safe & healthy.

3. I was one of the people that was at Wal-Mart at 4am the day after Thanksgiving. Some call us crazy, I say crazy like fox. I got HUGE deals & am 99% done with Christmas. And I was home & back in bed by 7:30am. Now who's crazy??

4. Hubbo cut son#2's hair. I was not a party to this of which I was totally thankful. It can be stressful & to be honest, I was glad I wasn't home when this went down. However, Hubbo seems to have discovered that son#2 will allow him to use scissors & remain unangered now but will NOT tolerate the clippers anymore. So with son#1 going to a salon now (and son#3 has a salon appointment Saturday too), and son#2 allowing us to use scissors, we have survived another stage of growing up!! Although, when it dried, there was just a touch of Friar Tuck there...

5. Both big boys retakes for school pictures turned out FANTASTIC! (for them) Now if they'll just let me pose them & get a shot for a Christmas photo.

6. Eureka! I think I've figured out how to start & possibly win the war on clutter in my house. I have a game plan people. Now if I can just get the energy to actually put it all into motion....

7. We got to watch a lot of movies this holiday on Hubbo's new tv/Christmas present. We have an old tv in the living room he had before we married & that son#2 pulled off the entertainment center once years ago. The sound is starting to go in it & the buttons on the front stick & won't work. You can't see dark things on it so we've finally entered the world of flat screens & digital tv. Whoo hoo! I had no idea it was so CLEAR! Now I don't have to stand next to the tv when something exciting happens.

8. I'm highly thankful that although Hubbo's company Christmas party was cancelled, he still got a Christmas bonus.

9. And I'm so thankful to my book club girls. We had such fun last night discussing our Christmas books and being giddy & silly while stuffing our faces. Then our crafts were fun & sooo cute! I needed that good, relaxing time & I'm so lucky to have met them.

10. I'm very thankful that Marilyn baked & brought her Rum Cake last night to book club. I really, really, really enjoyed it. And ask anybody, I don't even LIKE cake.:)

Ten Things Tuesday

1. The holidays are here starting THIS week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Break out the Christmas tree, turkey & my grandmother's recipe for stuffing, full tummies & holiday music!

2. I got to go to a craft fair. A really, really big one. Two actually. And I haven't done that in a long time, but I had a blast with my friends. We ate, walked & talked and laughed a lot. I was very. very tired afterwards but boy was it worth it!

3. Sunday I spent the afternoon reminiscing with two high school friends. One I hadn't seen for 15 years. We had a blast discussing all the roads God has taken us down.

4. Everyone here is well! I never got the crud the kids & Hubbo had, but my head cold is finally shipping out and I'm feeling a lot better. Hooray!

5. I got most of my teacher gifts purchased & done! That decision to not make everything, may have cost me more money, but is SO much less stressful & this year, that's a luxury I'll gladly pay for.

6. My computer was on the fritz & is working much better & faster now. Special thanks goes to Hubbo & the IT brother-in-law. Amazing how once you get going fast, you can't stand slow connections. It seems like such an injustice.

7. I'm at that time of year again where I challenge myself & the kids to remember to put money in every red bell ringing pot we see between now & Christmas.

8. Every year my husband's company hands out to them a free turkey from Arkansas/Tyson foods because they are one of their customers. I'm very thankful we have a 15.3 pounder in the freezer.

9. I'm thankful I got some organizing done this past week. Small, baby steps-- but I'm gonna get back to the organizational nut I was before the third kid if it kills me!

10. I had lunch with my mom & a friend yesterday. We went for Chinese and we had a very good time. "Egg Drop Soup For the Soul".

Ten Things Thursday

The fam has been rather ill here lately so Tuesday I couldn't post. Son#2 started with barfing Friday night. The baby began his round Saturday night, and by Tuesday morning, Hubbo was praying to the porcelin god as well. Son#1 started Tuesday night about the time we were set to go get his haircut. And yesterday I felt like I had a headcold. But thanks to Zicam, I'm feeling MUCH better today! (It tastes terrible, but it's worth it.)

1. Everyone is feeling much better here! Sick kids with both parents well is one thing, everyone sick with one parent down, you're outnumbered & even Lysol can't help you. It's been a long, long week.

2. I got good new color & haircut last Thursday from my friend Beth. Hubbo noticed & liked it so it has to be somewhat different for him to notice. Not to mention the body it's given my hair. I wake every morning looking like I have the Cowardly lion's mane. The word boufont comes to mind.

3. The kids retake pictures turned out GREAT! Son#1 didn't squinch his eyes up, and smiled normally & son#2 had his front teeth fixed & was considerably happier.

4. I bought my first Christmas presents last night! LET THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT BEGIN!!!!!!

5. I had a very fun time Saturday at my friend Carrie's house for her At Home party. I got to play with her son Mason and just enjoy good food & fun people.

6. Bare Escentuals make up had a TSV--Today's Special Value on QVC a couple of weeks ago & I missed it. Luckily I found it half priced through a friend!

7. I have a busy weekend ahead of me but I am mostly excited to see an old friend I went to high school with. He and I sang in choir, chorus & show choirs together from about 6th grade till we graduated. We spent a lot of time together & now he's a preacher in Florida. I can't wait to catch up on his life and where God has lead him.

8. A sweet friend that called to check on the sickies & me offering to stop by the store for us. She just had gall bladder surgery yet she's checking on us!

9. Being sick recently we've got to enjoy a lot of movies. Tropic Thunder, Get Smart, Zohan, The Happening, Hulk and Hellboy 2. As we were watching Get Smart last night, I remembered that as a kid I watched shows like Get Smart with my dad as my mom cooked & got dinner ready in the evenings. My dad worked from about 3-4am-4pm. So you can imagine he was in bed at 7pm most nights. I never felt cheated on time with him, but last night I realized, he & I watched a lot of tv shows in that dinner prep time. Rawhide, The Rifleman, Andy Griffin show, Get Smart, and of course, The Muppet Show. I remember rushing to set the table, my part of dinner and hurrying to go sit back in my dad's recliner with him to watch tv. I'm sure my mom could have used more help in the kitchen, but looking back, I sure am glad she didn't say so.

10. The holidays are here--I can feel it! Or at least I hope it's the holidays & not that virus....

Hidden Object Game

When I couldn't find my brush for days and my scissors had been missing a week or more, and I'd search the entire house multiple times, it finally hit me. We'd been having great weather & my window had been open from morning to afternoon. I put that clue together with the fact that son#2 has been in a phase of throwing things lately--behind the couch, tv cabinet, under the stove & beds, etc. And guess who'd been enjoying the breeze in my room lately???
When I looked outside I could NOT believe what I saw. I had to have Hubbo take pictures. Coupled with the leaves that had been falling off the trees it was like a Hidden Object puzzle from the Highlights magazine!!!


Here are the things to look for: (remember you can click the picture to enlarge)

* a hairbrush

* a toy cell phone

* a toy that is yellow & purple

* an army green hat (that apparently is going to work well for my cousin in the Army should he need to hide)

* a sippy cup

* a gray sheep

* a red tag (toy)

* six socks (2 blue, 4 white--which would explain why every morning I kept having to get another pair out)

* a blue handled pair of scissors

* a small black mag flashlight/keychain

Whimsical Wednesday...Again

I got up in a hurry this morning. I turned on the light in the bedroom for son#1 & son#2. As I hurry into the living room to the kitchen, I hear this from the dark.


Son#1: "Hold it right there!
I knew it was you. I could smell ya getting off the elevator! You was here last night too, wasn't ya?"

me: "Jackson is that you?"

son#1: " You was here...and you was smoochin' with my brother."

me: "WHAT!? What are you talking about?" (I keep making lunches.)

son#1: " Don't give me that. You been smoochin' with everybody! Snuffy, Al, Leo, Little Moe with the gimpy leg, Cheeks, Bony Bob, Cliff..."

me: "Jackson Allen, I do not have time for this, we're in a hurry this morning."

son#1: "All right, I believe you, but my Tommy gun don't! Get down on your knees and tell me you love me."

me: "Whatever, just get dressed."

son#1: "You gotta do better than that!"

me: "Fine, I love you." (I start to leave kitchen, back through living room to go get son#2 dressed)

son#1: "Maybe I'm off my hinges, but I believe ya. That's why I'm gonna let ya go. I'm gonna give you 'til the count of three to get ya lousy, lyin', low-down, four-flushin' carcass out my door! One... two...
(He makes all kinds of shooting noises.)

son#1: Three. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal. (shoots) And a Happy New Year.

me from bedroom: "That's nice dear, now please get dressed."


***In case you don't remember that monologue is from the movie "Home Alone 2- Lost In New York" when Kevin (McCully Culkin) stays at the hotel & uses clips from the movie "Angels with Filthy Souls " to scare the hotel staff away. Obviously son#1 has been watching this a lot.***

Ten Things Tuesday

Things have been slow & quiet around here and that's the way we like it. The weather is slowly changing to real crisp Autumn temps. And it's hard to believe we're into the double digit days of November already. Hopefully we won't have any more a/c days.
This week I'm thankful for:

1. I'm thankful for my husband who stayed home with my yesterday. Even thought it was raining all day, blowing sideways and COLD, we managed a good bit of fun. We're not alone often & we know how to make the most of it, even if it's freezing!

2. I'm thrilled to hear a best friend I never see anymore is engaged & happily planning a wedding. She's been waiting for this for so long I hope & pray she is as happy as I am.;) YEA for you Wendall!

3. I have an appointment to get my hair cut & colored Thursday morning. I'm getting excited thinking up things to do with it. Suggestions welcome!:) I'm just in the mood for something different. Plus I love hair appointments, nice girly time with some gossip on the side.

4. I had a blast Friday night at our crop. We were all low-key, less of us around, but we talked, got a lot done and I felt very statisfied with what I accomplished. I don't get to feel like I mark a lot of stuff off my "To Do" list very often, so feeling accomplishment is a rewarding thing.

5. Saturday I spent the day with my mom & family in Pryor. Our lunch was great and we had a marvelous time catching up. The kids were a little spunky further along in the day so it felt good to get home too where they could run & be free.

6. Son#3 is saying new words every day. I feel he understands SO much & is making huge progress with his verbal development. We are working puzzles, he is memorizing so much & really is taking things in and retaining the knowledge. Good signs for us!

7. Son#2 is staying at school & doing much better with his meltdowns & doing his work. He's back to being himself now. Thank the Lord for that one!

8. I'm very thankful for being invited to a Veterans day sale shopping/luncheon today with girls coming up from Joplin, but sadly it didn't work out. Oh well, there's always next time right??:)

9. I'm thankful to be back in my reading groove. Books are now piling up cause I can't read them fast enough!! "Twilight" is next!!!

10. And last, but by no means least, a huge THANK YOU to all the veterans, in my family and yours, who have served & are serving our country. Fighting for our freedom so we don't have to. Thank you all.

Wednesday Whimsey

This was in my email today from son#1's teacher:


Fashion advice from a boy on the spectrum.


Last week I wore a striped blouse, and Jackson said, “Please don’t wear that shirt ever again.”

I said, "What do you mean?"

Jack told me,“It makes you look like a prisoner and that makes me sad.”

I almost popped a button I laughed so hard!

What a kid.
I guess it is his way of saying I like you.

Ten Things Tuesday

1. My right as a woman, to vote. 1920---that wasn't that long ago.

2. The historical significance of this election---either way.

3. Thank you to my book club gals for letting me not be the only one to NOT finish Little Women. I loved it as a child. I met some of best friends through that book & a discussion of which sister we were. But I think I must have had the abridged version. The minutiae was rich and the narrator (I was listening to an audio download) sounded as bored as I felt. I guess that can happen with the giant gap from the 1800's when it was written to todays 2008 media fed audience. How sad!

4. I used the treadmill yesterday! It made an awful racket though, and this morning I found a book one f the kids stuffed down inside the belt part. Sigh!

5. I'm thankful I get to meet with my girlfriends this Friday night & scrapbook. I love that time with them.

6. I also am thankful I get to have another family lunch this Saturday at a great hole-in-the-wall Mexican place. Can't wait for GOOD salsa!!

7. My arm is feeling good enough to knit again. I'm working on some hats for my cousin who graduated Julliard this year, and decided to go into the Army so he can play with the famous Army band. He plays trombone. He finished basic training last week & is now in VA so he needs something to keep that noggin warm.

8. I'm very pleased my son's pumpkin won first place in the 5th grade division of the decorating contest. I'm happy to report, our clone tropper pumpkin was a hit.

9. Halloween was a first for our family this year. We were ALL able to go out trick-or-treating together as a family. It was very fun, very warm & the only real drama was that son#1 lost his Indiana Jones whip. The nice couple who's house we were at offered to get a flashlight & help look. But I assured them, in the dead grass & leaves, we'd probably never find the brown piece of yarn.:)

10. And last, I am VERY thankful, to be a SAHM--stay-at-home-mom.