Living Young

Sometimes life or it's lessons make us feel older than we are. Or sometimes, just as old as we really are. But I never seem to feel as old as I am. CLOSE, but I don't feel entirely "in my thirties" yet. Just having had a baby though, my body & I are feeling a tad more old than usual.

When you become a parent there is less time for young fun. It's soon replaced with kid fun. The moments of playing in the sprinkler with your kids, seeing their faces at Christmas time, the first time they say your name or "I love you". Your fun level is no longer about the new clothing store at the mall, what nice sporty car you drive, parties or talking with your friends on the phone until 3am.
Therefore, I choose to take one time a year to get away with NO kids for three days. My friend and I go down to Texas and attend a scrapbook convention. We go out to eat, picketing any place that serves happy meals, and take our time savoring every bite. (as parents you know how nice it is to eat without having to hurry every bite) We shop and stay in a hotel. We don't cook. We don't have to worry about anyone elses needs but our own for three whole days. It's heaven. But I also call it living young. We aren't worried about van payments, mortgages or packing lunches. We remember we're married, but forget we have someone else's needs to consider. We are enjoying life & having fun without worries. Freedom from our responsibilities IS living young.

Maybe I'm thinking about it more with death being so present in my life this year. And maybe it's making me think of all I still want to do. But I think it's mostly taught me not to take life too seriously because there are plenty of times we have to do that anyway. Don't get me wrong, I'm not having a mid-life crisis or wanting out from under my responsibilities as a parent & adult. I just realize you have to make time for fun, or you aren't a very sane adult.

I heard this song recently & it's my new anthem for having fun & being young at heart. Hopefully as the kids get older, I'll get more than three days a year to live young. But in the meantime, I plan to live it up & take my time enjoying being young.

MY NEXT THIRTY YEARS -Tim McGraw

I think I’ll take a moment, celebrate my age
The ending of an era and the turning of a page
Now it’s time to focus in on where I go from here
Lord have mercy on my next thirty years
Hey my next thirty years I’m gonna have some fun
Try to forget about all the crazy things I’ve done
Maybe now I’ve conquered all my adolescent fears
And I’ll do it better in my next thirty years
My next thirty years I’m gonna settle all the scores
Cry a little less, laugh a little more
Find a world of happiness without the hate and fear
Figure out just what I’m doing here In my next thirty years
Oh my next thirty years, I’m gonna watch my weight
Eat a few more salads and not stay up so late
Drink a little lemonade and not so many beers
Maybe I’ll remember my next thirty years
My next thirty years will be the best years of my life
Raise a little family and hang out with my wife
Spend precious moments with the ones that I hold dear
Make up for lost time here ,In my next thirty years

Our Tinga Baby

We had to put our Tinga dog to sleep yesterday. It was very sudden. She had stopped eating Thursday into Friday last week and then Saturday morning she came into our room & vomited. I took her outside & then when I went to clean it up I noticed lots of tiny blood clots. I was obviously concerned & called the vet who sort of blew it off as she probably swallowed something & to watch her.
Well then we saw her stools were black & tarry. Looking it up on the internet it could be her swallowing something or something more serious. All the clots & tarry stools were indicators of digested blood. She was still drinking at this point & really only acting tired, not sick or whinning or whimpering.
Then Sunday after we got back from my mom's house, she went had thrown up again & her stools were much worse. We took her into the vet & after they did some blood work said it was most likely Auto Immune Hemolyctic Anemia.
http://www.upei.ca/cidd/Diseases/immune%20disorders/autoimmune%20hemolytic%20anemia.htm

So basically her body is attacking red blood cells & killing them off. A dog's AIDS if you will. Her blood count was a 16! He sent us home to think about if we wanted to treat her or not. (lot of expense) That was super hard because you want to do what you can but how much can you spend? It was soooooooooooooo hard & terrible. We decided to bring her back in Monday (yesterday) morning for another blood count like they had suggested. Matt took her. It was a 10. It had digressed so rapidly they told us there was nothing to be done. They did say they would put her to sleep, but for $100. HA! (needless to say we won't be going back THERE anytime soon)

SO I called our old (GOOD) vet, Matt stayed home & we took her in the afternoon to be put down. After losing my dad so recently I didn't think this would be as hurtful. I was wrong. Matt & I both had THE hardest hardest time with it. After 4 1/2 yrs a pet becomes family. They are there day in & day out. I had to take her, Matt didn't think he could. I hated to think of her dying alone so I told them I wanted to stay. Once I got there, I couldn't even speak. I changed my mind. But they really seemed so genuine & loving, I believed her when she said they would take care of her. I had lost two dogs in my life before, but never been there when they were gone or put to sleep. One even died ON my 9th birthday. But this was seriously one of the hardest things I've EVER had to do in my LIFE.

Jackson hasn't asked yet. We told him yesterday daddy was home to help take Tinga to the dr she was sick. When he does ask, I'll probably tell him she went to be with Papa. It would have been way easier to have someone tells us it HAD to be done. (putting her to sleep) But I guess that's the sucky part of being a grown up.

I Found A Way To Relax!

I have never been good at relaxing & have been given many ideas from people just how to go about achieving this state of relaxation. This weekend I found the way.

I'll state for the record, I've never been a bath person. I know, I know...they are so luxurious & pampering. Okay so before I had children I did indulge in the occasional bubble bath & relax with a good book. However, I found I wasn't very good at not getting the book wet (a cardinal SIN to me) and the water gets cold quick. So, I do showers. I like showers. I don't miss baths.
Now I did TRY to enjoy a bath. Everyone on TV, in books & just in general makes us think women should enjoy & long for a nice bubble bath. I tried, I really did. I wanted to see what everyone was so excited over. I just never got it. I still don't. I have no problem missing out on water going cold, pruney skin, and wet books.

Maybe it's because I'm a GO GO GO person. I can't sit still long enough to ENJOY the experience of a bubble bath. I know from what I hear from other girls, it's an "experience". It's not JUST to cleanse your skin, it's to relax you mind, body & spirit.
Well not me pal! I don't relax. I think of the hundred things I SHOULD be doing. Even with the help of a good book, the cold water is deterrent. And that kids hand poking at me from under the door, could very well have something to do with it.

I am known for quick showers. I don't dilly dally in there. Not much to see or do in my opinion. Get in, get wet, lather up hair with shampoo, rinse, lather up conditioner on hair (this is my trick for getting time for it to work) and then lather the body. Rinse body, rinse hair, OUT. TIME!
Under 5 minutes. I'm good. I know you're asking what about shaving? Those are the 5 min showers.

This brings me around to my newest reason to love showers. I took a shower the other day in the middle of a Saturday. My husband was home, I had the opportunity with the kids distracted to take my time. It was a lazy day & my mood carried over into the shower. I took my time, I was in NO hurry. I let the water beat on my back where my muscles hurt. I usually like the water warm, NOT hot. I took the knob & cranked it to hot. Then when that got cool, I cranked it some more. It felt GOOOOOOOOOOD! And wouldn't you know the sound of the water totally drowns out the little cries of "Mommy!" seeping under the bathroom door.
I left there feeling like a whole new woman.
I wasn't feeling lazy anymore, I was RELAXED. I found a way to escape from the aches & pains of life! I discovered I LOVE showers. Maybe this is why my husband can take 15 minute showers until the hot water tank empties. I found his secret. I see now why he LOVED the hot water. It's hot to melt away the stress & worry from your muscles! Oh yeah, I am keeping my new habit of long showers & as soon as my kid is on the bus this afternoon, I'm off to the showers!
Who knew what I was missing!? I'm a happy, changed woman....pruney but relaxed.

Admiration

Something we as adults don't usually show outwardly is admiration. It's difficult to show without being ooey gooey or just juvenille about it. (Juvenille: what you would witness me doing if I ran into Brett Favre anywhere.)
As children I think it's easier to look up to someone or see qualities you admire and express it. Although you don't' know that's the right word for it then. You find things you want to imitate in others or things you don't.

As I get older I realize there are fewer people I care to imitate or look up to. I find as an adult there is more openess to our view of life. And let me define openess. I mean that you have the blinders off & the accessibility to see the things we couldn't as children. We see more of who people REALLY are. We know clothes and good looks aren't always all there is in life. We can see sometimes the people that act the happiest, aren't all that happy. We can identify the frauds more easily & just who is genuine & who's not.
Most of this comes not just with age but with life's lessons. By the time we've reached adulthood, we've experienced many things & been through a fair share of life lessons. Some of those we all go through on the road to adulthood, others are more unique to our own circumstances.

It's not often I experience moments of admiration as an adult. That's rather sad, but considering the state of our society today & what goes on in the world, it's not too suprising-just sad. And because they are few & far between, I think it's important to recognize them. To yourself and to
others. So I had one of these moments Friday night. I was out & about with my friend & her daughters (4th grade, 2nd grade, twin 1-1/2 yr olds) & my baby boy. (7 weeks old)
We were out eating Subway & then off to Hobby Lobby & the scrapbook store. Now think about what I just said. Two adult women, took 2 little girls & 3 babies out to ALLLLLL those places-on a Friday night in the RAIN. Brave huh?
The girls were excellent & well behaved as any teenager if not better. They helped take care of their babies & mine. They held doors to help us moms carrying stuff. They didn't complain about how long we were in a store or if they could have this or that. That was my moment of admiration. How often can that behavior happen you ask? Well, over the many years I've known my friend, her kids have 99% of the time, acted in this same well behaved way.

When I met my friend, her oldest daughter was in my 3's class at our church preschool & her youngest was in my son's class. I was in love with her daughter & her long blonde hair & big blue eyes. She had the best lunches with black olives & dill pickles, all my favorites. And I was pregnant & always teasing her about trying to eat her lunch. I really noticed how well behaved she was in class & afterwards. Most kids would go crazy when their parents showed up after school, but not hers. They knew better. Then later in the school year my friend's husband, a sheriff's deputy, started dropping her girls off early so they could both get to their college classes downtown. I would run across the street at lunch & pick up their son from kindergarten & bring him over for the afternoon to the preschool. I was in total admiration for this woman who went back to school, raised three children & was married to a police officer. Her children were ALWAYS polite & just incredibly well behaved. They just have good old fashioned manners! Something MOST children today are dearly lacking.

So over the years I've still kept my admiration for her. No bubble was burst getting to know her family & spending lots of time with them. If anything my reasons to admire her have grown over the years. The fact she has 5 children is just a small one. But mostly I marvel at her ability to raise these children. She had twin girls at the age of 35 & still has more energy than me most days. She'll deny it, but she does. She'll take her kids out & not even blink an eye about how many there are or how many places they'll be getting out at. (I wait until my husband is home so I don't have to take TWO out with me! I'm LAZY!)

Getting back to Friday night, after I got home I had that realization again of how much I love her family & kids. She manuevers them in a way that they aren't throwing fits to be in a stroller for 2 hrs. She has strangers approach her & comment on how well behaved the babies are! I mean WHO has kids like this!? Her older girls are always helpful & are holding doors for people, turn in lost items, say "excuse me". I mean how many kids do you know that DO those things? They are special people & I really truly am in awe at how she is doing such a good job, I might even want to be around them when they are teenagers. And that's saying A LOT since I'm not sure I'll want to be at my own house when my kids hit puberty.