My Five Smooth Stones

The Executive Director of the board of my dream home for Carson, has agreed to a face to face meeting Wednesday January 13th at 1pm. She has reminded us she is NOT the YES or NO lady. She is the, "I might be persuaded to push this through to the admissions committee who does say YES or NO." (which with her name on it, probably will be a tiny bonus)
After much thought & prayer---I will be going to that meeting with Texas Lawyer.
I'm going to drive down Wednesday and spend a blissful night in a hotel enjoying the time alone after that meeting and come home Thursday.
I haven't had much of that in the last 100 days. Just in the car on the way to and from the hospital.

Friday and Saturday I spent the days and nights pretty scared. Should I go to the meeting or not?
I had talked myself into a corner. Be careful what you pray for---you just might get it!!
What if I went to Texas and I said all the wrong things?
What if I didn't go and I should have gone?
What if Executive Director of the Board says no? It will go no further.
What would I do if it ends here?
Do I have it in me to keep going if this is a no?
All this time I wanted an answer---who will I be with that answer being a no? Am I still able to fight?

But I reached out to some friends & spiritual touchstones for me. I laid it out for them and for God. All the insecurity, all the fear, all the doubt.
And those friends were quick to step in with reminding me no matter how much I mess up with my words, if I go or don't go, and no matter how much I want Carson's forever home to be the DATC----God has a plan. God is bigger than any mistakes I could make. And whether I am there or not, God will open whatever door he needs to.

David chose five stones, not out of doubt in God, but to be prepared. David knew the power wasn't in his sling, but in the Lord. Scripture says God works all things out for good, for those that love him--who have been called according to his purpose. BUT---you gotta stick it out through the problem phase. All of it. You can't quit. And God's plan isn't always going to be your plan in the end. Sometimes you take five stones and He only needs one.

I have to remind myself not to let the giants in Carson/my life, get bigger than God.
I need to give my will to God.
The Holy Spirit is The Strengthener.
Why would God send us the Holy Spirit if not to do more than just "get by"?
IF YOU STARE AT THE ENEMY TOO LONG--YOU'LL THINK YOURSELF RIGHT OUT OF A VICTORY!
So like young David who had to be scared to face Goliath---I will select my five smooth stones and I will take them to the giant state of Texas with me.