But Why?

First I need to start off with explaining that Son#1 distingiushes his food by shapes. He always has. Round crackers are Ritz crackers. Octagon crackers are oyster crackers. And then of course that leaves his favorite cracker, saltines, or square crackers. Son#1's array of food isn't a long list. Part of Autism a lot of times leads to sensory issues. As I've described before, haircuts, loud noises etc. Food has texture to it...all of it. That makes it a sensory issue. Since he was a baby Son#1 would take those Gerber jars of babyfood with tiny chunks of meat in it & eat the spoonful only to wallow the piece of meat around in his mouth & deposit it back on my spoon. He wasn't even walking yet when he did this. He's NEVER been a fan of meat or veges or fruit.



So most days he's eating crackers, yogurt, chips or peanutbutter pretzels. On rare occasions we can get him to eat a grilled cheese. When he first started going to Denny's we had to "BYOF"-Bring Your Own Fries. Then he tried grilled cheese & from then on proclaimed "GOLD CHEESE SANDWICHES" good fare. BUT, only the ones from Denny's. Just a note here, don't ever think they'll let you buy JUST the sandwich with no fries at Denny's. They won't. They'll still charge you $3 for one plain "gold cheese" sandwich. This got to be an expensive habit because he'll eat several at a time. We even had acquired some of the red plastic baskets they serve the sandwiches in to fool him at home. I would cut my wax paper just so, make sure the sandwich was browned but not too brown. Cut it on the diaganol. No go. He knew it wasn't Denny's. However, this year, we've discovered he'll eat Sonic gold cheese sandwiches. Hurray! Cheaper & closer to our house. We indulge him about once every two weeks. Before you think I'm a mean mommy, he's figured out how to put up a wall & hold out on eating. So if we did the Sonic grilled cheese all the time, he'd never eat anything else & he'd wait us out for it, trust me. Same with McD's fries. We've tried to show him Wendy's has fries, and so does Braums. No go. That child is too smart for his own good.



The shape of the food brings me around to this past Sunday morning. I got Son#1 to accompany me & the baby to church that morning. I had plenty of books, snacks, Star Wars guys & dropped the baby off at the nursery. I had prepped him in the car we had to whisper, sit still and at one point they'll dim the lights but it won't get dark. (during communion) I was looking forward to him going to children's Bible hour & getting to sit through a sermon. It's been awhile! Daddy has to stay at home with Son#2 because he's the strongest...and this time, Son#2 protested A LOT at being left out.



So as we come in to the auditorum, he sees the communion plates ready for later at the back of the auditorium. He was very curious. I pull him on & we sit and he does super throughout the first part of the service. Then communion time came, the lights dimmed, and he leans over & whispers to me, "What's going on?"



me: "Remember I told you the lights would dim but not go out. This is communion"



We were doing good till they brought "the bread". Sigh!



Son#1: (in loud whispered voice) "Hey! Those are square crackers! I LOVE square crackers! I want some!"



me: "Uh no. These ARE square crackers, but they are grown-up square crackers, see how big they are? And kids aren't supposed to eat them. See-No kids are eating them."



Son#1: "But why can't I have any? My tummy is telling me it's hungry & I love square crackers! Everyone else is eating but me!" (which was sort of true to a very literal minded child)



Luckily by this point the nice man had come & taken the tray away again. But then, it's time for the grape juice.



Son#1: "Oh yummm I LOVE cherry juice! Look at all the little cups Julie!"



me:"Yeah but those aren't for kids either. And it's grape juice, not cherry juice."


I try to hold the tray with one hand, take my tiny cup with the other, and guess who moved in for the kill? You got it! Now I realize that these things represent other things (Christ blood & body) and they won't HURT him to eat them. But I didn't really have it in me to deal with all those weird looks people throw you when people just let their kid do the buffet conga through the communion trays.



I managed to get the juice away from him without too much incident & back in the tray & pass it off. I gave him his snacks from my bag & distracted him with change for the contribution that was next. And don't worry, I was careful to explain to my VERY literal son, that you can't take it back out when you put it in the tray. Crisis avoided.



Although he went to children's Bible hour, he came back after a little bit, not liking their singing. Everyone's a critic. He sat looking at his Bible & books. I was so proud he do so well. Then as he started getting antsy I showed him on the front of the announcement the order things were progressing in. Song titles, prayers, and sermon. I showed him that we just had a little bit longer. Two songs a prayer & we could go. He wasn't thrilled but kept it together. For a bit.

Then someone went forward during our invitation song. Uh oh, we're deviating from the program. Mom said two songs and a prayer...this is taking even longer! He did start whispering quite loudly. I was on the end & he was trying to get past me. I finally pulled out the ol' "Be quiet & sit down, everyone is looking at you."



Son#1: (stands up, looks around) "No they're not!"



me: sigh! "Sit your hiney down or there's not computer when we get home!"



Then the closing prayer.



Son#1:"What's a prayer?"



me: "You know what a prayer is. It's when we talk to God."



Son#1: (looking all around) "But where is he, I don't see him?"



me:"He's in heaven, remember? With Papa & Nana2? We can't see him."



Son#1: "Then why are we talking to him?"


I was just SOOOO thankful Jimmy Allen wasn't there to lead us in 16 verses of "Just As I Am".