Ten Things Wednesday, Yeah WEDNESDAY--I'm thankful & it doesn't matter what day it is that I get around to writing about it.
1. MY BABY WILL BE HOME IN TWO DAYS!!!!!! Sure other stuff can happen to prevent that, *cough/Satan/cough* BUT, I chose to think positive & have faith and BELIEVE God wants it & with our faith, it will be truth.
2. I'm so thankful for air conditioning. And that includes borrowed window units.
It makes me a nicer person too.
3. Some people don't have good bus situations for their school kids, but we've been really lucky to have not good, but GREAT bus people. Some have moved, some have passed on. But we still have good ones here & they always go above & beyond. This time they stepped up letting us borrow a seat belt lock for son#2 this weekend.
4. Thank you God for terrific friends, family & church family. Listening to me whine, stress & flip-out. Always there to talk me off the ledge & help problem solve. And without all of our friends, we would never have made it through this 9 months son#2's been away.
5.I'm thankful for my boys---without them I don't think I'd smile & laugh as much. Sure three kids is more of a handful than one. But I'd rather have more the laughs & memories. They are so hilarious & make me crazy all at the same time. Life's stressful and to have them distracting me & keeping me busy helps keep me up in the happy, rather than down in the dumps.
6. I had a friend who's young 3 yr old daughter was accidently hit in the head with a golf club last week. She had surgery & has recovered amazingly well! A true miracle. It was such a scary situation to hear about & see. I'm truly very thankful that God had His hand on her & the doctors.
7. This summer has been so different already from past summers for me. It is NOT my favorite time of year. I detest it. It depresses me. Seriously.
But this year, there's a little less stress, no summer school so we set our own schedule & we have an extra car so the kids & I aren't home bound all day.
8. I have reason to also give thanks that son#1 is STILL eating homemade grilled cheese & loving it! He is saving me some money & making some other small concessions on yogurt. Baby steps---but the first baby steps since he was about 6yrs old. I'll take it.
9. We've had two elders here in our home congregation that have health scares recently. I'm excited to see them doing better & better with time and prayers. The power of prayer & an earnest heart is so wonderful.
10. Mothers are a strong breed. Mine has great endurance & when we need her, she comes to the rescue.
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Jesus Take The Wheel
Best to just jump in and rip the band-aid off.
It wasn't good people. I'll just shoot straight with ya. I wasn't stressed about son#2 coming home for a visit again, I was stressed trying to get all of the end of the school year crapola done. (Yes mom, "crapola". It rhymes with crayola.)
In fact, I was SO very happy son#2 was coming. I had big plans. I cooked all day Thursday and made his favorite casserole, veges and cookies. I had dinner ready for when we'd get home Friday. I couldn't even stop smiling if I'd wanted to Thursday.
Friday, well, first God blessed us with clouds on the trip up because it was already humid and 80 degrees. Therapy was at 10am and son#2 was looking SO good. We were all packed up, checked out around 11am, had the big bag of his meds and were on our way. We thought we'd stop at the halfway point on the way back in Stroud at their McDonalds for lunch to eat & let son#2 stretch his legs. I had *just* taken a cute picture of all my chickies in the backseat and sent it to my friends saying that my heart was singing, when "it" happened.
We blew a tire just after getting on I-35 again. The one tire that was old and original.(The Sheriff said the tire nuts were rusted on.) We had heard a "POP" sound like something hit the back end of the car but cars & trucks were passing us so fast, we assumed it was a dirt clod or something. (Apparently it was a plug in the tire and it had popped out & the tire lost air pretty fast.) As soon as we pulled over, the clouds disappeared. Of course.
I called for the auto-club, and warned the police where we were on the highway and that we had two Autistic kids in the car--3 kids total. Does that seem unwarranted to you? The dispatcher thought so & let me know they did not have the man-power to have someone come & wait with us while we were changing a flat tire. I said okay, I was just giving you a warning, and politely hung up.
BRIGHT SIDE NOTE: I have been told, the Oklahoma Highway Patrol was not happy with the way they handled the last incident we were involved in bringing son#2 back last time. SO they will all be undergoing training in how to deal with Autistic persons. I cannot tell you how happy I am to think we went through all that horrible mess, to help someone else later down the road so maybe their experience, is bettered in some way.)
I think Hubby had joked with a friend just this week that we were going to try and get the police headcount down from 12 to 2 this time around. We are nothing if not truthful.
Two uniformed officers came. One was a Sheriff & stopped to check on us after stopping a teeny, tiny, old lady in a Cadillac just to make sure she wasn't a teenager stealing the vehicle. And the other came for back up, all before the auto club guy showed. The AAA guy was impressed that the police came (it seriously IS not a good highway to change a tire on yourself and they told us this AGAIN.) and not just one but TWO.
After I had made these initial phone calls, I called Camelot immediately to let Lolly the therapist know what was going on. Just in case someone had to come get son#2. Turns out we'd passed Toya, our son's staff member/miracle worker, in the parking lot without seeing her. She heard what was going & drove out to help keep son#2 cool & calm. It was SO nice of her on her day off. She loves my baby so I love her.
After we were on our doughnut, (Which son#3 was *dying* to see for himself--envisioning a real doughnut--he is indeed my child.)we followed Toya to a nearby Wal-Mart to get a real tire. We weren't taking three kids home with a back spare for 2 hrs.
Turns out that first (yes, FIRST) WM, didn't have a tire & lube bay. We headed to the next one (#2), again following Toya, and it was just a small Wal-Mart Neighborhood Market. Fail!
We did about 20 mins more of driving, with hungry, very tired, hot kids in the backseat, and found ANOTHER WM(#3). Toya and I go in, while Hubby took the car info down about the tire. I had promised the kids McDonalds, and it turns out this specific WM, only had Subway. Damn those healthy buggers! Son#1 had a meltdown, son#2 quickly took a lady in the next booth's bun off her sandwich and scared her half-to-death. Luckily she was good-natured about it all. And about the time Toya & I started to get it under control, Hubby comes back to say, that the automotive dept computer *says* there's a tire there to fit our car, but they can't find it.
So we packed up kiddos and took off to ANOTHER WM.
Toya again leading the parade. (And adults still having not eaten or drank much yet.) But at least we're keeping son#2's demon's at bay.
2pm-ish
It's 90 degrees by now. We get to our fourth WM, and yes they have the tire, and YES they have a McDonalds. We sent poor Toya back off into her own life to enjoy her weekend off. God bless her with something. She deserved it. Second lunch for kids! Yes, we're hobbits. While Hubby was off dealing with the car/tire issue, I got the kids eating and some very nice lady came & asked me if I needed help. She looked so concerned for me. God bless her but there was nothing she could do at this stage unless she had a bag full of money and big ol' chill pill for mama bear!
We walked around in that WM for 2 hrs. Son#2 was over-stimulated and finding strange things like ladders he'd take down that tickled his fancy and the other two with giant cases of the "Gimme's".
I think we spent the majority of our time on the fan aisle. It was the warmest WM I've been inside in awhile. Of course.
(Oh and a big fat thank you, to the goobers that left a used Big Gulp on a shelf near the fans complete with nasty dried out, opened package of Whoppers. You made son#2's day & that hunger I was starting to feel went bye-bye. And whatever idiot boy came up with putting all the S'more makings like Hershey bars back by automotive---THANK YOU TOO! I owe ya big time. I thought that'd be a safe part of the store since the other food half was definitely off limits. But NOoooooooo! Thanks for that.)
We also realized during these trips to different Wal-Marts that our battery cables needed replaced because it's not a great connection. We lost the clock and the cigarette lighter. Which means no charger for the dvd player or phones or Tom-Tom. Of course.
4pm
We made a decision & called Camelot. We were going to take son#2 back to camp. There was no way in our mind that he'd get in a hot car, in prime Memorial Day weekend traffic and drive 2 hrs back home with us--eat, shower & go to bed--turning around and leaving the house Saturday by 8am again. It was too much. We had wasted our day & never left the city. It was so, utterly disappointing. I wanted to cry, puke and slap somebody all at once. I would never have been as sane as I was through all of it (and I'm pretty sure Hubby questions that.) if I didn't have my Prayer Warrior Chicks. They were on it. We were texting & they were lifting me up in prayer when I just didn't have the energy myself. God is good. It was such a long, hot day. It probably sounds pretty tame in comparison to the other incident, but you've never spent a day chasing after my three sons in a Wal-Mart. And I bet if I let you, you wouldn't or couldn't do it again. It was safe & air-conditioned.
4:30pm
We took son#2 back to camp. He was fine with us leaving then. I know he was so tired. He kept yawning & he's the Energizer bunny. I told Lolly when I handed back all his meds I'd been tempted to take the whole bag myself to calm me down. She laughed. I didn't.
The traffic was not nearly as bad as I thought it'd be on the way back to Tulsa, but the wind was causing some trucks trouble with keeping on the road. I was so jumpy and stressed with any bump or noise the car made. I think I drove my husband batty. (**see below**)
7pm
I am happy to say we were SAFELY home. Son#3 kept yipping happily when he saw things he recognized,that we "were back in Oklahoma!" and how we needed to take the subway the next time we go to see Carson. Hubby and I agreed it'd be smart to dig a tunnel for a train. I might do that this summer.
I wish I could tell you our story ended her. It didn't.
We ordered a pizza when we got home & seriously I can't even explain the drama. They called me back immediately asking for the address to confirm it was for delivery. It would be a 35-45 min wait. Sigh! But when it'd been an hour and I could peel myself off the couch I called back...
Me: "Where is our pizza South Broken Arrow Papa Johns?????"
PJ: "Umm well no one put delivery on it, it's been sitting here."
ME: "What's your name?"
PJ: "Drew."
Me: "Well, listen Drew. The reason I know this mess up is your fault is because you called me back to ASK me what address for delivery. SO, I'd like a newly baked HOT pizza that's free. Do you think you can do that Drew?"
PJ: /pause "Umm yeah I think we can. We will. I'll do that."
Me: "Thank you. I'll tell ya Drew, I just spent a very bad day in a city I didn't want to be stuck in ever again, and it's still a pretty bad day. I haven't eaten a bite of food all day and it's now 8pm. I want you to know I know it's not YOUR fault Drew but I'm yelling at you just the same. Okay?"
PJ: "Yeah okay. I'm sorry."
Me: "Thank you Drew. Now go make me a pizza."
For those of you who can't picture ME saying that & actually standing up for myself---you can bet your sweet bippy I DID say all that--100% true! It was NOT the day to mess with me. And this location had done this SAME thing to us the LAST time we got back from the highway incident with son#2. Of course.
9pm
Camelot called. After we left & son#2 was at dinner he got upset and had to be put in a hold. He knew he was supposed to get to go. But WE knew he'd never have made it for 2 more hrs in the car. It may not make sense to you, but I beg you not to judge that. My big mama heart wanted him home. I wanted to squeeze him & love on him all night long. But the day would have gotten worse. And we had two kids in the car besides him that were exhausted & desperate to get home too. They were sad too. Son#3 broke my heart writing me a note last night that I should never leave son#2 at camp again.
Camelot called again today. Son#2 bit a nurse & they had to pry his teeth off her arm. He's mad. Not the usual staff--holiday weekend. And he's not at home. He knows. I know. My heart isn't singing anymore. It's sad. Very sad. I know I've written a lot & you wanna stop reading. I know I've said this before, but it warrants repeating.
Autism can warrant pity or garner sympathy or even support. But it's not pretty day in and day out. It's the screaming child at the supermarket/McDonalds, that didn't get their way or you didn't do it the same way for. It's the child no one understands or who people stare at or find uncomfortable to be around. And difficult to even like all the time. Some people feel uncomfortable with what they can't fix. They may like you, but they just don't understand. However, it is what it is. And knowledge is power which is why I let you in on all the ins/outs sometimes. It sure isn't because I like typing it all out to relive it. Knowledge can change behavior and that excites me. I don't feel I can change the world but I can help change mine. Sometimes.
**For you church people I kept thinking of the song about "The winds and the waves shall obey Thy will, peace be still, peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm tossed sea or demons or men or whatever it be, no water can swallow the ship where lies the Master of ocean and earth and sky. They all shall sweetly obey Thy will, peace be still, peace be still. They all shall sweetly obey Thy will, peace, peace be still."
It wasn't good people. I'll just shoot straight with ya. I wasn't stressed about son#2 coming home for a visit again, I was stressed trying to get all of the end of the school year crapola done. (Yes mom, "crapola". It rhymes with crayola.)
In fact, I was SO very happy son#2 was coming. I had big plans. I cooked all day Thursday and made his favorite casserole, veges and cookies. I had dinner ready for when we'd get home Friday. I couldn't even stop smiling if I'd wanted to Thursday.
Friday, well, first God blessed us with clouds on the trip up because it was already humid and 80 degrees. Therapy was at 10am and son#2 was looking SO good. We were all packed up, checked out around 11am, had the big bag of his meds and were on our way. We thought we'd stop at the halfway point on the way back in Stroud at their McDonalds for lunch to eat & let son#2 stretch his legs. I had *just* taken a cute picture of all my chickies in the backseat and sent it to my friends saying that my heart was singing, when "it" happened.
We blew a tire just after getting on I-35 again. The one tire that was old and original.(The Sheriff said the tire nuts were rusted on.) We had heard a "POP" sound like something hit the back end of the car but cars & trucks were passing us so fast, we assumed it was a dirt clod or something. (Apparently it was a plug in the tire and it had popped out & the tire lost air pretty fast.) As soon as we pulled over, the clouds disappeared. Of course.
I called for the auto-club, and warned the police where we were on the highway and that we had two Autistic kids in the car--3 kids total. Does that seem unwarranted to you? The dispatcher thought so & let me know they did not have the man-power to have someone come & wait with us while we were changing a flat tire. I said okay, I was just giving you a warning, and politely hung up.
BRIGHT SIDE NOTE: I have been told, the Oklahoma Highway Patrol was not happy with the way they handled the last incident we were involved in bringing son#2 back last time. SO they will all be undergoing training in how to deal with Autistic persons. I cannot tell you how happy I am to think we went through all that horrible mess, to help someone else later down the road so maybe their experience, is bettered in some way.)
I think Hubby had joked with a friend just this week that we were going to try and get the police headcount down from 12 to 2 this time around. We are nothing if not truthful.
Two uniformed officers came. One was a Sheriff & stopped to check on us after stopping a teeny, tiny, old lady in a Cadillac just to make sure she wasn't a teenager stealing the vehicle. And the other came for back up, all before the auto club guy showed. The AAA guy was impressed that the police came (it seriously IS not a good highway to change a tire on yourself and they told us this AGAIN.) and not just one but TWO.
After I had made these initial phone calls, I called Camelot immediately to let Lolly the therapist know what was going on. Just in case someone had to come get son#2. Turns out we'd passed Toya, our son's staff member/miracle worker, in the parking lot without seeing her. She heard what was going & drove out to help keep son#2 cool & calm. It was SO nice of her on her day off. She loves my baby so I love her.
After we were on our doughnut, (Which son#3 was *dying* to see for himself--envisioning a real doughnut--he is indeed my child.)we followed Toya to a nearby Wal-Mart to get a real tire. We weren't taking three kids home with a back spare for 2 hrs.
Turns out that first (yes, FIRST) WM, didn't have a tire & lube bay. We headed to the next one (#2), again following Toya, and it was just a small Wal-Mart Neighborhood Market. Fail!
We did about 20 mins more of driving, with hungry, very tired, hot kids in the backseat, and found ANOTHER WM(#3). Toya and I go in, while Hubby took the car info down about the tire. I had promised the kids McDonalds, and it turns out this specific WM, only had Subway. Damn those healthy buggers! Son#1 had a meltdown, son#2 quickly took a lady in the next booth's bun off her sandwich and scared her half-to-death. Luckily she was good-natured about it all. And about the time Toya & I started to get it under control, Hubby comes back to say, that the automotive dept computer *says* there's a tire there to fit our car, but they can't find it.
So we packed up kiddos and took off to ANOTHER WM.
Toya again leading the parade. (And adults still having not eaten or drank much yet.) But at least we're keeping son#2's demon's at bay.
2pm-ish
It's 90 degrees by now. We get to our fourth WM, and yes they have the tire, and YES they have a McDonalds. We sent poor Toya back off into her own life to enjoy her weekend off. God bless her with something. She deserved it. Second lunch for kids! Yes, we're hobbits. While Hubby was off dealing with the car/tire issue, I got the kids eating and some very nice lady came & asked me if I needed help. She looked so concerned for me. God bless her but there was nothing she could do at this stage unless she had a bag full of money and big ol' chill pill for mama bear!
We walked around in that WM for 2 hrs. Son#2 was over-stimulated and finding strange things like ladders he'd take down that tickled his fancy and the other two with giant cases of the "Gimme's".
I think we spent the majority of our time on the fan aisle. It was the warmest WM I've been inside in awhile. Of course.
(Oh and a big fat thank you, to the goobers that left a used Big Gulp on a shelf near the fans complete with nasty dried out, opened package of Whoppers. You made son#2's day & that hunger I was starting to feel went bye-bye. And whatever idiot boy came up with putting all the S'more makings like Hershey bars back by automotive---THANK YOU TOO! I owe ya big time. I thought that'd be a safe part of the store since the other food half was definitely off limits. But NOoooooooo! Thanks for that.)
We also realized during these trips to different Wal-Marts that our battery cables needed replaced because it's not a great connection. We lost the clock and the cigarette lighter. Which means no charger for the dvd player or phones or Tom-Tom. Of course.
4pm
We made a decision & called Camelot. We were going to take son#2 back to camp. There was no way in our mind that he'd get in a hot car, in prime Memorial Day weekend traffic and drive 2 hrs back home with us--eat, shower & go to bed--turning around and leaving the house Saturday by 8am again. It was too much. We had wasted our day & never left the city. It was so, utterly disappointing. I wanted to cry, puke and slap somebody all at once. I would never have been as sane as I was through all of it (and I'm pretty sure Hubby questions that.) if I didn't have my Prayer Warrior Chicks. They were on it. We were texting & they were lifting me up in prayer when I just didn't have the energy myself. God is good. It was such a long, hot day. It probably sounds pretty tame in comparison to the other incident, but you've never spent a day chasing after my three sons in a Wal-Mart. And I bet if I let you, you wouldn't or couldn't do it again. It was safe & air-conditioned.
4:30pm
We took son#2 back to camp. He was fine with us leaving then. I know he was so tired. He kept yawning & he's the Energizer bunny. I told Lolly when I handed back all his meds I'd been tempted to take the whole bag myself to calm me down. She laughed. I didn't.
The traffic was not nearly as bad as I thought it'd be on the way back to Tulsa, but the wind was causing some trucks trouble with keeping on the road. I was so jumpy and stressed with any bump or noise the car made. I think I drove my husband batty. (**see below**)
7pm
I am happy to say we were SAFELY home. Son#3 kept yipping happily when he saw things he recognized,that we "were back in Oklahoma!" and how we needed to take the subway the next time we go to see Carson. Hubby and I agreed it'd be smart to dig a tunnel for a train. I might do that this summer.
I wish I could tell you our story ended her. It didn't.
We ordered a pizza when we got home & seriously I can't even explain the drama. They called me back immediately asking for the address to confirm it was for delivery. It would be a 35-45 min wait. Sigh! But when it'd been an hour and I could peel myself off the couch I called back...
Me: "Where is our pizza South Broken Arrow Papa Johns?????"
PJ: "Umm well no one put delivery on it, it's been sitting here."
ME: "What's your name?"
PJ: "Drew."
Me: "Well, listen Drew. The reason I know this mess up is your fault is because you called me back to ASK me what address for delivery. SO, I'd like a newly baked HOT pizza that's free. Do you think you can do that Drew?"
PJ: /pause "Umm yeah I think we can. We will. I'll do that."
Me: "Thank you. I'll tell ya Drew, I just spent a very bad day in a city I didn't want to be stuck in ever again, and it's still a pretty bad day. I haven't eaten a bite of food all day and it's now 8pm. I want you to know I know it's not YOUR fault Drew but I'm yelling at you just the same. Okay?"
PJ: "Yeah okay. I'm sorry."
Me: "Thank you Drew. Now go make me a pizza."
For those of you who can't picture ME saying that & actually standing up for myself---you can bet your sweet bippy I DID say all that--100% true! It was NOT the day to mess with me. And this location had done this SAME thing to us the LAST time we got back from the highway incident with son#2. Of course.
9pm
Camelot called. After we left & son#2 was at dinner he got upset and had to be put in a hold. He knew he was supposed to get to go. But WE knew he'd never have made it for 2 more hrs in the car. It may not make sense to you, but I beg you not to judge that. My big mama heart wanted him home. I wanted to squeeze him & love on him all night long. But the day would have gotten worse. And we had two kids in the car besides him that were exhausted & desperate to get home too. They were sad too. Son#3 broke my heart writing me a note last night that I should never leave son#2 at camp again.
Camelot called again today. Son#2 bit a nurse & they had to pry his teeth off her arm. He's mad. Not the usual staff--holiday weekend. And he's not at home. He knows. I know. My heart isn't singing anymore. It's sad. Very sad. I know I've written a lot & you wanna stop reading. I know I've said this before, but it warrants repeating.
Autism can warrant pity or garner sympathy or even support. But it's not pretty day in and day out. It's the screaming child at the supermarket/McDonalds, that didn't get their way or you didn't do it the same way for. It's the child no one understands or who people stare at or find uncomfortable to be around. And difficult to even like all the time. Some people feel uncomfortable with what they can't fix. They may like you, but they just don't understand. However, it is what it is. And knowledge is power which is why I let you in on all the ins/outs sometimes. It sure isn't because I like typing it all out to relive it. Knowledge can change behavior and that excites me. I don't feel I can change the world but I can help change mine. Sometimes.
**For you church people I kept thinking of the song about "The winds and the waves shall obey Thy will, peace be still, peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm tossed sea or demons or men or whatever it be, no water can swallow the ship where lies the Master of ocean and earth and sky. They all shall sweetly obey Thy will, peace be still, peace be still. They all shall sweetly obey Thy will, peace, peace be still."
Monday, April 30, 2012
New Med Trial
I wanted to give you all a little update on son#2's latest issues at "camp".
Since the incident on the highway with son#2, Hubby and I have discussed what we think we need to see in son#2 before he comes home to us.
He has to be able to control those impulses to harm himself & others when he gets upset, doesn't get his way or gets uncomfortable.(Too hot, hungry or diaper issues.)
He's been on his "good med" since 2006. Unfortunately the main side effect is it causes him to be thinking of food continually. Which leads to weight issues. With him having lost so much weight at camp, we felt that was a good sign it was controllable.
However, the inability to control his other impulses when he doesn't get his way, isn't healthy for him or anyone else around him. And the "good med" doesn't seem to be able to curb all of those. So Hubby & I decided to talk to his therapist about trying something new to take the place of the "good med" while he is in a controlled environment like camp. In the past we've been able to see within one day if a pill/med would work or not for him. But this time the doctor didn't wean him off the "good med", she just jumped in cold turkey off one, and onto the "bad med" starting little by little increasing it's dose.
There has been no change in his behavior for the good. It's all been steps backwards and if anything has caused more damage in progress. He is taking his clothes off again, the holds were more frequent & for longer periods of time. And the first three days he barely slept at all. I was ready to abandon ship last Sunday night when during a hold son#2 banged his head on the floor and split open his eyebrow area. Of course he wouldn't allow them to apply pressure to stop the bleeding. But once he calmed down & went to sleep, the nurses could see it didn't need stitches. That incident just set the tone of the entire week. It's been one phone call after another; every day bringing more phone calls & worse incidents involving his anger and aggression. One of the hardest weeks during his 8 months away for me. (That's right folks, it's been 8 months!)
We went to see him on this Saturday the 28th, and he was so happy to see us. He smiled, laughed and held tight to me. He walked us around the courtyard lap after lap, holding on to my hand or arm. And sometimes just smiling & jabbering up a storm. It was so great to see him happy. He even let us redirect him verbally when he veered off course or tried to duck into the cafeteria early. But because of his behavior that week he lost the privilege of going on a pass with us. As we left, the director stopped us for a brief chat. During that time, I guess son#2 got upset with us leaving after lunch & he was in another 20 min hold. Later that night they called to tell us he had shattered a window in his bedroom with his head. He was actually fine, but the window had to be repaired Sunday. We've had an average Fri/Sat/Sun of four phone calls a day/night.
This morning they called a little before 9am to tell me that he had been in a hold at 1am and again that morning after he woke up. BUT, the saving grace is this morning the doctor is taking him completely off of the "bad med" and putting him back on the "good med"!! Thank God!
What I believe has happened on this "bad med" is a placebo effect. It's as if he has had no medicine in his system at all. As the reserve of the "good med" has leeched out of his body, we're left with the behaviors we've seen when we've taken him off all meds once or twice in the past. Carson Raw. And it ain't pretty people. Autism can be an ugly beast when it's in the buff.
It's difficult as a mommy in those situations to be far away from your children. Especially when they can't speak for themselves. Part of the conversation we had with the director Saturday was about the continued bumps to the head in the same spot. Which in other kids with the same issues as son#2, has gone on to cause a seizure disorder. So it's important we get the aggression under control, especially since the obvious end result we want to see is him home with us. It's been a tough 10 days but I'm happy and so very relieved to think we're over this hill. I got another call this afternoon that son#2 was in a hold, but the "good med" should start building up in his system soon and hopefully with that will come less and less meltdowns. I thank God & hope that we are on our way down the other side of that hill. Prayers are welcome & appreciated.
Since the incident on the highway with son#2, Hubby and I have discussed what we think we need to see in son#2 before he comes home to us.
He has to be able to control those impulses to harm himself & others when he gets upset, doesn't get his way or gets uncomfortable.(Too hot, hungry or diaper issues.)
He's been on his "good med" since 2006. Unfortunately the main side effect is it causes him to be thinking of food continually. Which leads to weight issues. With him having lost so much weight at camp, we felt that was a good sign it was controllable.
However, the inability to control his other impulses when he doesn't get his way, isn't healthy for him or anyone else around him. And the "good med" doesn't seem to be able to curb all of those. So Hubby & I decided to talk to his therapist about trying something new to take the place of the "good med" while he is in a controlled environment like camp. In the past we've been able to see within one day if a pill/med would work or not for him. But this time the doctor didn't wean him off the "good med", she just jumped in cold turkey off one, and onto the "bad med" starting little by little increasing it's dose.
There has been no change in his behavior for the good. It's all been steps backwards and if anything has caused more damage in progress. He is taking his clothes off again, the holds were more frequent & for longer periods of time. And the first three days he barely slept at all. I was ready to abandon ship last Sunday night when during a hold son#2 banged his head on the floor and split open his eyebrow area. Of course he wouldn't allow them to apply pressure to stop the bleeding. But once he calmed down & went to sleep, the nurses could see it didn't need stitches. That incident just set the tone of the entire week. It's been one phone call after another; every day bringing more phone calls & worse incidents involving his anger and aggression. One of the hardest weeks during his 8 months away for me. (That's right folks, it's been 8 months!)
We went to see him on this Saturday the 28th, and he was so happy to see us. He smiled, laughed and held tight to me. He walked us around the courtyard lap after lap, holding on to my hand or arm. And sometimes just smiling & jabbering up a storm. It was so great to see him happy. He even let us redirect him verbally when he veered off course or tried to duck into the cafeteria early. But because of his behavior that week he lost the privilege of going on a pass with us. As we left, the director stopped us for a brief chat. During that time, I guess son#2 got upset with us leaving after lunch & he was in another 20 min hold. Later that night they called to tell us he had shattered a window in his bedroom with his head. He was actually fine, but the window had to be repaired Sunday. We've had an average Fri/Sat/Sun of four phone calls a day/night.
This morning they called a little before 9am to tell me that he had been in a hold at 1am and again that morning after he woke up. BUT, the saving grace is this morning the doctor is taking him completely off of the "bad med" and putting him back on the "good med"!! Thank God!
What I believe has happened on this "bad med" is a placebo effect. It's as if he has had no medicine in his system at all. As the reserve of the "good med" has leeched out of his body, we're left with the behaviors we've seen when we've taken him off all meds once or twice in the past. Carson Raw. And it ain't pretty people. Autism can be an ugly beast when it's in the buff.
It's difficult as a mommy in those situations to be far away from your children. Especially when they can't speak for themselves. Part of the conversation we had with the director Saturday was about the continued bumps to the head in the same spot. Which in other kids with the same issues as son#2, has gone on to cause a seizure disorder. So it's important we get the aggression under control, especially since the obvious end result we want to see is him home with us. It's been a tough 10 days but I'm happy and so very relieved to think we're over this hill. I got another call this afternoon that son#2 was in a hold, but the "good med" should start building up in his system soon and hopefully with that will come less and less meltdowns. I thank God & hope that we are on our way down the other side of that hill. Prayers are welcome & appreciated.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Happy Mother's Day...Early
I've wanted to write this post for a long time now. I've been sitting on it, mulling it over and trying to find just the write words to convey the picture I wanted to share.
Today seemed right because a very sweet family we know, is in San Diego today with their 5 yr old son, who is getting a pacemaker put in. Gavin is strong and his mama is even stronger.
Another child in our church got to come home from the hospital where he's been for months in Ohio. It was so sweet to see him with his whole family Easter Sunday. Gage is strong and Kris is even stronger.
When it was time for us to make the decision to let son#2 go away to "camp" and get help, everyone asked me how I could handle such a thing. All I know, is that God's good. Good enough to help me when I surely couldn't help myself.
When I went to the Bible to look for an example of my inner turmoil, I saw God's sacrifice of His son on the cross, I saw Job and his suffering of loosing his wife & children. Surely my own situation could not compare to the gravity of those specific examples. My child wasn't going to die, but it sure felt like I might. Then one day while talking to a family member, the realization hit me like a ton of bricks.
SARAH.
Have you ever noticed or thought about Genesis chapter 22 where God calls Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, how we don't hear one peep from Sarah, the mother? I feel relatively sure one of two things occurred in their little tent home that day. Either Abraham took Isaac with him and did not tell Sarah what God had asked him to do, OR Abraham and Sarah had some words.
I would think, that should the later be the case, there would be a few more chapters in Genesis if God felt that was helpful to us, but it's not in there. I double checked.
God asks the FATHER, to take Isaac and use him as a sacrifice. Kill him. And the next morning Abraham sets out with his son. So that means Abraham had to sleep on it. (And possibly talk to his wife about it.) Assuming he could sleep.
It took THREE days to reach the location to be used for sacrifice. That's a lot of thinking time. As most of us know, the story goes along that God stops Abraham from sacrificing his only son. Not ONCE is Sarah mentioned in the story or the 22nd chapter of Genesis.
What about this, what if Sarah knew what Abraham was doing? What God had asked him to do with Isaac. What if she had peace, faith and trust? That she just knew God would take care of her son. She was human. There had to still be tears and turmoil over all of that. Sarah waited SO long to have a baby--to give him up? Second guessing--"Did Abraham hear God right? He is getting older. They say the hearings the first thing to go..."
Mary the mother of Jesus had quite a job requirement--Mother to the Messiah, virgin mother, let him go to the temple and be with his Father, when I bet all she wanted was to hold him close and keep him with her. Fast forward, and she was at the foot of the cross, watching her son suffer a horrible death at the hands of others. Was this what God chose her for? To watch her child suffer? Why would God think she could do this?
Maybe He chose Mary & Sarah--and other countless strong moms like Elizabeth and Hannah and women I know today--because they had tremendous FAITH. He had a hard job that needed to be done, and he knew man usually likes to think they can do everything on their own, but these women, THESE WOMEN, would turn humbly to God. They'd seek him in prayer, thanksgiving, question AND doubt. And they would give Him, the glory and adoration.
Amazing! As a Christian we strive to be as Christ-like as we can. Far, far from perfect, we just don't make him proud some days. I cannot get over what a privilege and a blessing for a woman's faith to be picked to handle such extraordinary things! I'm humbled by Faith, Kris, Kim and countless other moms I watch and know. That God saw to it, that your spirit was so specially made for this difficult job. A job that sometimes makes you feel alone, angry, confused, worried and thrilled beyond any measure--usually all in one day. Being a mom is certainly not the most important job in the world, and it is not everyone's cup of tea. It doesn't make us better than any other woman and it doesn't make us less. But even God felt Christ would need a mother for his stay here on earth.
Today seemed right because a very sweet family we know, is in San Diego today with their 5 yr old son, who is getting a pacemaker put in. Gavin is strong and his mama is even stronger.
Another child in our church got to come home from the hospital where he's been for months in Ohio. It was so sweet to see him with his whole family Easter Sunday. Gage is strong and Kris is even stronger.
When it was time for us to make the decision to let son#2 go away to "camp" and get help, everyone asked me how I could handle such a thing. All I know, is that God's good. Good enough to help me when I surely couldn't help myself.
When I went to the Bible to look for an example of my inner turmoil, I saw God's sacrifice of His son on the cross, I saw Job and his suffering of loosing his wife & children. Surely my own situation could not compare to the gravity of those specific examples. My child wasn't going to die, but it sure felt like I might. Then one day while talking to a family member, the realization hit me like a ton of bricks.
SARAH.
Have you ever noticed or thought about Genesis chapter 22 where God calls Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, how we don't hear one peep from Sarah, the mother? I feel relatively sure one of two things occurred in their little tent home that day. Either Abraham took Isaac with him and did not tell Sarah what God had asked him to do, OR Abraham and Sarah had some words.
I would think, that should the later be the case, there would be a few more chapters in Genesis if God felt that was helpful to us, but it's not in there. I double checked.
God asks the FATHER, to take Isaac and use him as a sacrifice. Kill him. And the next morning Abraham sets out with his son. So that means Abraham had to sleep on it. (And possibly talk to his wife about it.) Assuming he could sleep.
It took THREE days to reach the location to be used for sacrifice. That's a lot of thinking time. As most of us know, the story goes along that God stops Abraham from sacrificing his only son. Not ONCE is Sarah mentioned in the story or the 22nd chapter of Genesis.
What about this, what if Sarah knew what Abraham was doing? What God had asked him to do with Isaac. What if she had peace, faith and trust? That she just knew God would take care of her son. She was human. There had to still be tears and turmoil over all of that. Sarah waited SO long to have a baby--to give him up? Second guessing--"Did Abraham hear God right? He is getting older. They say the hearings the first thing to go..."
Mary the mother of Jesus had quite a job requirement--Mother to the Messiah, virgin mother, let him go to the temple and be with his Father, when I bet all she wanted was to hold him close and keep him with her. Fast forward, and she was at the foot of the cross, watching her son suffer a horrible death at the hands of others. Was this what God chose her for? To watch her child suffer? Why would God think she could do this?
Maybe He chose Mary & Sarah--and other countless strong moms like Elizabeth and Hannah and women I know today--because they had tremendous FAITH. He had a hard job that needed to be done, and he knew man usually likes to think they can do everything on their own, but these women, THESE WOMEN, would turn humbly to God. They'd seek him in prayer, thanksgiving, question AND doubt. And they would give Him, the glory and adoration.
Amazing! As a Christian we strive to be as Christ-like as we can. Far, far from perfect, we just don't make him proud some days. I cannot get over what a privilege and a blessing for a woman's faith to be picked to handle such extraordinary things! I'm humbled by Faith, Kris, Kim and countless other moms I watch and know. That God saw to it, that your spirit was so specially made for this difficult job. A job that sometimes makes you feel alone, angry, confused, worried and thrilled beyond any measure--usually all in one day. Being a mom is certainly not the most important job in the world, and it is not everyone's cup of tea. It doesn't make us better than any other woman and it doesn't make us less. But even God felt Christ would need a mother for his stay here on earth.
Monday, April 02, 2012
Weekend Visit
Well, our time with son#2 had many ups and downs. I don't regret it--I had my chickie in the nest for 23 hrs.
He was so happy to be going with us Friday. Unfortunately we could not find his seat belt lock, so he was a bit uncontainable in the backseat. But he smiled all the way home. Until about 15 minutes before our exit, when he proceeded to take off his wet diaper and disrobe entirely. Naked as a Jaybird as my mom would say.
Makes you wanna laugh I'm sure, thinking of us maneuvering through the traffic and backstreets of our town trying to keep people in SUV's and semi's from peering down into our mobile nudist colony. It was rather stressful though. And there was poo involved. Not too much, but even a little, is plenty.
My friend Joanie, who was at the house when the other two kids got off the bus, was very helpful in having a blanket ready to throw around son#2 and bring him inside. She had the shower going and wipes at the ready. I have loving and generous friends (Kim, Candice, & Elizabeth) who brought over tons of food for us for the weekend and were key in helping the weekend flow as smooth as it could. Thank you God I wasn't too proud to turn down their idea of meals to help out. Son#2 looooooves, I mean LOVES him some food, so this was an integral part of his enjoyment. And we had some pizza, salad ready for son#2 as soon as his shower was done. He was a happy camper until we tried to make him sit on the potty later & he ran me down the hallway just like a tackling dummy. Loosing 25lbs and 6 points on his BMI, just means he's a lean, mean, muscle machine.
The brothers enjoyed watching the movie "UP" with all of us and son#2 in our bed. He smiled, chattered and laughed all evening long. And we were so grateful he kept ALL his clothes on (except his socks/shoes) the whole weekend! And at bedtime he was a good little boy and stayed in bed laughing and chatting for an hour before falling asleep and sleeping in later than anyone else the next morning. A full nights sleep is never to be taken for granted at our house.
I had worked out I needed to go pick up some MORE shorts for son#2 to take back with him. He gone from XL shirts to M. And his shorts from XL to S! It's costing us an arm and a leg, but I sure can't complain--in fact I wish I had this problem myself! After rushing to two different Wal-Marts and labeling all the clothes, the other two boys went to spend the day (a much longer day than we originally thought) with our friend Melodie and her kiddos.
Son#2 did great on the ride back to camp. He watched some of his favorite videos of Veggie Tales and Elmo's World. And we had smartly packed a lunch of sandwiches & chips on the trip with some juice for him. He ate & was quite happy. Until we merged off of the turnpike onto I-35 heading south and we were 5 minutes from camp and a quarter of a mile from our exit. Our car felt like it hit a bump and we lost acceleration. Our car had power but we had to coast to the side of the interstate. And where we were, all that was available was a guardrail, not even a shoulder of the road. I immediately called for a tow truck, and then called Camelot to tell them we'd be late checking son#2 back in. I asked since we were 5 minutes away and it was about to get hot with no a/c, if they'd come get our son to keep him from being so uncomfortable. They refused, saying we had checked him out and needed to check him back in. I then called highway patrol for a trooper. I also called a cousin who lives in Norman thinking maybe he could come over & give me a ride with son#2 but he said it'd take him 40 mins but he'd head our way. Poor guy, I had to call him back (ever so slightly hysterical) and let him know the trooper was on his way. (Thanks for being a good sport Ryan & rolling with the punches--it'll make you a great dad.)
Son#2 was DONE. He had peed his diaper, he was hot and he immediately disrobed. Cars and semi's were coming so close there was no getting out of the car. This was gonna get ugly FAST. Son#2 had already started to scratch at Hubby who was sitting directly in front of him. When the trooper arrived he angled his car so we wouldn't get creamed getting out of our car & I filled him in on the situation. I asked him to please take son#2 and I down the road to camp--PRONTO. He suggested we forgo any other clothes and just try shorts. I agreed and squeezed out my side and hopped in the backseat to wrestle some clothes on our 11 year old nudist.
That didn't go so well. I stepped in gum, he kicked me into the guardrail or car door, I don't know which, but one of my butt cheeks feels like a donkey kicked me, so I landed somewhere pronounced. Then he went on the defense and started grabbing any flesh he could to pinch, scratch and fight. He grabbed my underarm flab and pinched a huge portion. And bit me on the same arm on the back of it just under my shoulder. He wasn't getting dressed without a fight and he HATES to be held down. All because he was hot. He almost pushed the trooper out into traffic and so he called for backup.
Unfortunately, that brought TEN state trooper cars, two OKC motorcycle cops, and a firetruck. Needless to say, one whole lane of traffic was blocked off on I-35 southbound. I was so worried they would hurt him & I had to keep making it known that he was 11 years old and couldn't talk! (People really never do take us seriously when we say how strong son#2 is.) They needed the TEN TROOPERS to take turns when one wore themselves out. After about 45 minutes they were able to literally hog-tie him with handcuffs on his hands and feet on his stomach in the back of a troopers car. They kept asking me if he'd been bitten by a dog, or if he was on any drugs. It was HORRIFIC to watch all this. There is no better word to describe it all. In the middle of all of this, the tow truck came for our car and their Lieutenant came in plain clothes to survey the situation and introduced himself.
I saw a news crew on the opposite side of the highway going slow & eventually making it's way across a huge grass median to us. I asked the troopers if they could please make them go away. I even told them it was fine with me if they used their guns. I saw the news crew leave and circle back around behind the long line of cop cars and then one of them got out & kept motioning me to come talk to him. I ignored him but after Hubby was done getting the car/tow truck taken care of, the reporter started on him. Poor Hubby, he thought it was a plain clothes policeman. In my husband's words, I FLEW over there after he had only 5 words out of his mouth. I yelled at him, "DON'T TALK TO HIM!" I stuck my finger in this 6'2 reporters chest & started screaming at the top of my lungs and he backed away & left. I remember saying something about did he have kids, this was none of his business, and if he knew what was good for him he better back it up. Hubby says I went from zero to 60. Mama Bear. I find it interesting the police never tried to help the guy.
After the ambulance came to bring a board to transport son#2 to the hospital, he had calmed down. The troopers mistakenly thought the ambulance could/would sedate him. They won't. I knew that from past experience. The ambulance then blocked off the other lane of the highway so our side was completely at a standstill. They got some information and then took son#2 to OU Children's ER. I called Camelot AGAIN, they again, refusing to come get him from there as well. I had by this point found a friend who would meet me at Camelot and Hubby could ride with the ambulance. Then I see another news crew that took up shop in the grassy median and started filming me getting into the trooper car. So if you saw me on the OKC news, I pray they blurred out my face.
Once son#2 got some water, and they uncuffed him at the hospital, he was fine. They still had him in the database from being there a few weeks before when he drank the rubbing alcohol. He ate two Popsicles, I showed up (A HUGE thank you to Hannah!!) with his clothes and off we went back to check him back into camp. Sweet as can be! I wasn't pleased with the treatment and unsympathetic answers I got from camp when I called.
And today I called and let Lolly the therapist know everything. She's gonna call me back later this week. I told her customer service was very unsatisfactory. I did not create the situation, and I thought they were there to be a support to son#2 and us. And to have them practically disavow any knowledge of us, was distressing and made the situation which was bad, ten times worse. I think she got my point.
A lovely, kind friend, who had already given her time the night before when we brought son#2 home, gave us more time & her gasoline, to come get us and bring Hubby & I back home Saturday night. What a very long, no good, very bad terrible day. But because God is good, it was saved from being a total loss. We had great, wonderful friends rescuing us, listening to me hysterically rant & rave and keeping the rest of our clan safe & none the wiser. Funny enough, the evening before on our drive home with son#2, we had discussed if we won the mega million lottery, what all we'd do with the money and who all we'd help in the name of God and Autism. God has such a sense of humor because we ended up not winning (I know you're shocked.) so instead of helping others, we humbly had to take, help from others. Many others. As my friend says, "It takes a village."
Hubby & I have a our battle scars. His neck looks like some cool, red tattoo of Chinese symbols. And my arms, well both sons #1/#3 keep asking if I got tattoos. Ironically, Doctor M at camp, had mentioned Friday, because son#2 didn't seem to show any progress at potty training, that maybe her work was at an end with him. Heads up lady, you can ride in the backseat the next two hour trip we take and see if maybe you find some issues you think you might be able to work on with him. Sound fair?
He was so happy to be going with us Friday. Unfortunately we could not find his seat belt lock, so he was a bit uncontainable in the backseat. But he smiled all the way home. Until about 15 minutes before our exit, when he proceeded to take off his wet diaper and disrobe entirely. Naked as a Jaybird as my mom would say.
Makes you wanna laugh I'm sure, thinking of us maneuvering through the traffic and backstreets of our town trying to keep people in SUV's and semi's from peering down into our mobile nudist colony. It was rather stressful though. And there was poo involved. Not too much, but even a little, is plenty.
My friend Joanie, who was at the house when the other two kids got off the bus, was very helpful in having a blanket ready to throw around son#2 and bring him inside. She had the shower going and wipes at the ready. I have loving and generous friends (Kim, Candice, & Elizabeth) who brought over tons of food for us for the weekend and were key in helping the weekend flow as smooth as it could. Thank you God I wasn't too proud to turn down their idea of meals to help out. Son#2 looooooves, I mean LOVES him some food, so this was an integral part of his enjoyment. And we had some pizza, salad ready for son#2 as soon as his shower was done. He was a happy camper until we tried to make him sit on the potty later & he ran me down the hallway just like a tackling dummy. Loosing 25lbs and 6 points on his BMI, just means he's a lean, mean, muscle machine.
The brothers enjoyed watching the movie "UP" with all of us and son#2 in our bed. He smiled, chattered and laughed all evening long. And we were so grateful he kept ALL his clothes on (except his socks/shoes) the whole weekend! And at bedtime he was a good little boy and stayed in bed laughing and chatting for an hour before falling asleep and sleeping in later than anyone else the next morning. A full nights sleep is never to be taken for granted at our house.
I had worked out I needed to go pick up some MORE shorts for son#2 to take back with him. He gone from XL shirts to M. And his shorts from XL to S! It's costing us an arm and a leg, but I sure can't complain--in fact I wish I had this problem myself! After rushing to two different Wal-Marts and labeling all the clothes, the other two boys went to spend the day (a much longer day than we originally thought) with our friend Melodie and her kiddos.
Son#2 did great on the ride back to camp. He watched some of his favorite videos of Veggie Tales and Elmo's World. And we had smartly packed a lunch of sandwiches & chips on the trip with some juice for him. He ate & was quite happy. Until we merged off of the turnpike onto I-35 heading south and we were 5 minutes from camp and a quarter of a mile from our exit. Our car felt like it hit a bump and we lost acceleration. Our car had power but we had to coast to the side of the interstate. And where we were, all that was available was a guardrail, not even a shoulder of the road. I immediately called for a tow truck, and then called Camelot to tell them we'd be late checking son#2 back in. I asked since we were 5 minutes away and it was about to get hot with no a/c, if they'd come get our son to keep him from being so uncomfortable. They refused, saying we had checked him out and needed to check him back in. I then called highway patrol for a trooper. I also called a cousin who lives in Norman thinking maybe he could come over & give me a ride with son#2 but he said it'd take him 40 mins but he'd head our way. Poor guy, I had to call him back (ever so slightly hysterical) and let him know the trooper was on his way. (Thanks for being a good sport Ryan & rolling with the punches--it'll make you a great dad.)
Son#2 was DONE. He had peed his diaper, he was hot and he immediately disrobed. Cars and semi's were coming so close there was no getting out of the car. This was gonna get ugly FAST. Son#2 had already started to scratch at Hubby who was sitting directly in front of him. When the trooper arrived he angled his car so we wouldn't get creamed getting out of our car & I filled him in on the situation. I asked him to please take son#2 and I down the road to camp--PRONTO. He suggested we forgo any other clothes and just try shorts. I agreed and squeezed out my side and hopped in the backseat to wrestle some clothes on our 11 year old nudist.
That didn't go so well. I stepped in gum, he kicked me into the guardrail or car door, I don't know which, but one of my butt cheeks feels like a donkey kicked me, so I landed somewhere pronounced. Then he went on the defense and started grabbing any flesh he could to pinch, scratch and fight. He grabbed my underarm flab and pinched a huge portion. And bit me on the same arm on the back of it just under my shoulder. He wasn't getting dressed without a fight and he HATES to be held down. All because he was hot. He almost pushed the trooper out into traffic and so he called for backup.
Unfortunately, that brought TEN state trooper cars, two OKC motorcycle cops, and a firetruck. Needless to say, one whole lane of traffic was blocked off on I-35 southbound. I was so worried they would hurt him & I had to keep making it known that he was 11 years old and couldn't talk! (People really never do take us seriously when we say how strong son#2 is.) They needed the TEN TROOPERS to take turns when one wore themselves out. After about 45 minutes they were able to literally hog-tie him with handcuffs on his hands and feet on his stomach in the back of a troopers car. They kept asking me if he'd been bitten by a dog, or if he was on any drugs. It was HORRIFIC to watch all this. There is no better word to describe it all. In the middle of all of this, the tow truck came for our car and their Lieutenant came in plain clothes to survey the situation and introduced himself.
I saw a news crew on the opposite side of the highway going slow & eventually making it's way across a huge grass median to us. I asked the troopers if they could please make them go away. I even told them it was fine with me if they used their guns. I saw the news crew leave and circle back around behind the long line of cop cars and then one of them got out & kept motioning me to come talk to him. I ignored him but after Hubby was done getting the car/tow truck taken care of, the reporter started on him. Poor Hubby, he thought it was a plain clothes policeman. In my husband's words, I FLEW over there after he had only 5 words out of his mouth. I yelled at him, "DON'T TALK TO HIM!" I stuck my finger in this 6'2 reporters chest & started screaming at the top of my lungs and he backed away & left. I remember saying something about did he have kids, this was none of his business, and if he knew what was good for him he better back it up. Hubby says I went from zero to 60. Mama Bear. I find it interesting the police never tried to help the guy.
After the ambulance came to bring a board to transport son#2 to the hospital, he had calmed down. The troopers mistakenly thought the ambulance could/would sedate him. They won't. I knew that from past experience. The ambulance then blocked off the other lane of the highway so our side was completely at a standstill. They got some information and then took son#2 to OU Children's ER. I called Camelot AGAIN, they again, refusing to come get him from there as well. I had by this point found a friend who would meet me at Camelot and Hubby could ride with the ambulance. Then I see another news crew that took up shop in the grassy median and started filming me getting into the trooper car. So if you saw me on the OKC news, I pray they blurred out my face.
Once son#2 got some water, and they uncuffed him at the hospital, he was fine. They still had him in the database from being there a few weeks before when he drank the rubbing alcohol. He ate two Popsicles, I showed up (A HUGE thank you to Hannah!!) with his clothes and off we went back to check him back into camp. Sweet as can be! I wasn't pleased with the treatment and unsympathetic answers I got from camp when I called.
And today I called and let Lolly the therapist know everything. She's gonna call me back later this week. I told her customer service was very unsatisfactory. I did not create the situation, and I thought they were there to be a support to son#2 and us. And to have them practically disavow any knowledge of us, was distressing and made the situation which was bad, ten times worse. I think she got my point.
A lovely, kind friend, who had already given her time the night before when we brought son#2 home, gave us more time & her gasoline, to come get us and bring Hubby & I back home Saturday night. What a very long, no good, very bad terrible day. But because God is good, it was saved from being a total loss. We had great, wonderful friends rescuing us, listening to me hysterically rant & rave and keeping the rest of our clan safe & none the wiser. Funny enough, the evening before on our drive home with son#2, we had discussed if we won the mega million lottery, what all we'd do with the money and who all we'd help in the name of God and Autism. God has such a sense of humor because we ended up not winning (I know you're shocked.) so instead of helping others, we humbly had to take, help from others. Many others. As my friend says, "It takes a village."
Hubby & I have a our battle scars. His neck looks like some cool, red tattoo of Chinese symbols. And my arms, well both sons #1/#3 keep asking if I got tattoos. Ironically, Doctor M at camp, had mentioned Friday, because son#2 didn't seem to show any progress at potty training, that maybe her work was at an end with him. Heads up lady, you can ride in the backseat the next two hour trip we take and see if maybe you find some issues you think you might be able to work on with him. Sound fair?
Monday, March 26, 2012
Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig
January was my last blog? Wow, has it been that long really?
I've been so busy trying to make the most of my time during the days.
This type of day where I'm alone during most of the daytime hours, is something I'm just starting to feel comfortable with & see as my new normal.
This has been a better time for son#2 at Camelot since after Christmas. He's making some progress and other areas the progress didn't go as we planned so we cut some goals down to a more manageable size.
We have little update from the bruising investigation. It *is* over. But the day after the lady turned in her report, she resigned.
Lolly doesn't see that as anything too telling, just that it's such a difficult job. It's one thing to hear about things or know what happens or can happen to children. It's an entirely different matter to see it day in and day out.
I'm hoping that the report has now made it's way to the head of Camelot and that we can discuss that in our therapy session this Friday.
Our passes with son#2 have jumped from 2 hrs/4hrs and then 6 hrs one Saturday at the zoo with all the kiddos. Which other than a memorable trip to the women's restroom, went wonderfully! And now we have him for 23--TWENTY-THREE HOURS--this Friday. We have therapy from 1-2pm. Then once we get his meds & check him out, we will have a two hour drive back home. (4hrs total) Then to have him back the next day, it's another 4 hr trip. 8 hrs of driving in 23 hrs for us. With these gas prices, we may need some prayers and to pick up a money tree at Lowes on the way home!
I've known for a couple of weeks now that son#2 was coming for this visit. I'll be honest, I was SO stressed out thinking about it at first.
He's so used to his schedule at "camp". And he does, no lie, a minimum of 35 fit laps a day. What if I mess up his new meds? What if he needs to be put in a hold while he's here?
What if he slips back into his bad habits the minute he walks in the door?
We've adjusted to the house NOT being Fort Knox in the past six months, we can relax & not worry. To return to that...
Maybe this will explain it better, we have lived at a heightened state of alert with son#2 at all times over the past 6 yrs.
We called it Defcon 4. Anything bigger was pretty deep doo-doo. (No pun intended.)
So maybe you can understand, when son#2 was here one day, and gone the next, how strange it was. What an adaption to go from Defcon 4 to zero. Such a loss, like a death. What do you do with yourself when you don't have to focus so much energy on that one person 24/7?
It's rather like gaining weight as you age. You don't gain an extra 40 lbs in one day or one week. Gradually day by day, you add on to your base number, until one day you realize when you look in the mirror it's gotten to a not-so-great place.
The same goes with Autism. Our "normal" and our children, are all we know. I didn't raise anyone's kids but my own. (Thank the kind Lord!) So my life went gradually to a place where most of the time my house is locked down like Fort Knox. You may think that's a cute exaggeration but not two weeks ago, son#2 was having his nightly phone call with us, when someone had left out a bottle of rubbing alcohol in the office and he drank it.
After hours of worry & prayers from my Merry Band of PW's (Prayer Warriors) and a kind ER doctor/husband of a friend, we knew son#2 was okay even before he got home from the ER at 2am.
Now, I'm over the stress of son#2 coming home....we're literally get a chain/padlock for the fridge. Life will go on. It's 23 hrs---we're going to enjoy it, and be that exhausted happy at the end of it. I plan to drink in every second of it.
All the "what-if's" be damned. We'll go to this high, and then when he's gone back to "camp", we'll go to a low for awhile. Unfortunately, that's life. It ebbs and flows, peaks and dips. Ours is NOT the only one. I know parents who are doing heroic things like dealing with physical issues their children daily.
But he's my baby and this Friday by dinner time, all my chickies will be in the nest. I'll survive, he'll live and we'll enjoy as much as we can out of the entire thing. It won't be easy, but no great thing ever is right? Just think about planning a wedding...
I've been so busy trying to make the most of my time during the days.
This type of day where I'm alone during most of the daytime hours, is something I'm just starting to feel comfortable with & see as my new normal.
This has been a better time for son#2 at Camelot since after Christmas. He's making some progress and other areas the progress didn't go as we planned so we cut some goals down to a more manageable size.
We have little update from the bruising investigation. It *is* over. But the day after the lady turned in her report, she resigned.
Lolly doesn't see that as anything too telling, just that it's such a difficult job. It's one thing to hear about things or know what happens or can happen to children. It's an entirely different matter to see it day in and day out.
I'm hoping that the report has now made it's way to the head of Camelot and that we can discuss that in our therapy session this Friday.
Our passes with son#2 have jumped from 2 hrs/4hrs and then 6 hrs one Saturday at the zoo with all the kiddos. Which other than a memorable trip to the women's restroom, went wonderfully! And now we have him for 23--TWENTY-THREE HOURS--this Friday. We have therapy from 1-2pm. Then once we get his meds & check him out, we will have a two hour drive back home. (4hrs total) Then to have him back the next day, it's another 4 hr trip. 8 hrs of driving in 23 hrs for us. With these gas prices, we may need some prayers and to pick up a money tree at Lowes on the way home!
I've known for a couple of weeks now that son#2 was coming for this visit. I'll be honest, I was SO stressed out thinking about it at first.
He's so used to his schedule at "camp". And he does, no lie, a minimum of 35 fit laps a day. What if I mess up his new meds? What if he needs to be put in a hold while he's here?
What if he slips back into his bad habits the minute he walks in the door?
We've adjusted to the house NOT being Fort Knox in the past six months, we can relax & not worry. To return to that...
Maybe this will explain it better, we have lived at a heightened state of alert with son#2 at all times over the past 6 yrs.
We called it Defcon 4. Anything bigger was pretty deep doo-doo. (No pun intended.)
So maybe you can understand, when son#2 was here one day, and gone the next, how strange it was. What an adaption to go from Defcon 4 to zero. Such a loss, like a death. What do you do with yourself when you don't have to focus so much energy on that one person 24/7?
It's rather like gaining weight as you age. You don't gain an extra 40 lbs in one day or one week. Gradually day by day, you add on to your base number, until one day you realize when you look in the mirror it's gotten to a not-so-great place.
The same goes with Autism. Our "normal" and our children, are all we know. I didn't raise anyone's kids but my own. (Thank the kind Lord!) So my life went gradually to a place where most of the time my house is locked down like Fort Knox. You may think that's a cute exaggeration but not two weeks ago, son#2 was having his nightly phone call with us, when someone had left out a bottle of rubbing alcohol in the office and he drank it.
After hours of worry & prayers from my Merry Band of PW's (Prayer Warriors) and a kind ER doctor/husband of a friend, we knew son#2 was okay even before he got home from the ER at 2am.
Now, I'm over the stress of son#2 coming home....we're literally get a chain/padlock for the fridge. Life will go on. It's 23 hrs---we're going to enjoy it, and be that exhausted happy at the end of it. I plan to drink in every second of it.
All the "what-if's" be damned. We'll go to this high, and then when he's gone back to "camp", we'll go to a low for awhile. Unfortunately, that's life. It ebbs and flows, peaks and dips. Ours is NOT the only one. I know parents who are doing heroic things like dealing with physical issues their children daily.
But he's my baby and this Friday by dinner time, all my chickies will be in the nest. I'll survive, he'll live and we'll enjoy as much as we can out of the entire thing. It won't be easy, but no great thing ever is right? Just think about planning a wedding...
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Ten Things Wednesday
1. Son#2 is doing well lately. He hasn't had anymore incidents, knock on wood. And I've come to the conclusion that his bruises were more likely from a teeter totter or such thing that he probably did to himself. I think the negligence probably came from the newbie staff member not keeping an eye on him or reporting the accident that occurred. The investigation is still on-going, but I'm already assuming, most likely we will never know.what truly happened.
2. I'm thankful to feel 100% physically better now. You can handle things so much better mentally when you physically feel better & I'm sure not taking that for granted. Test results back, and I don't have rheumatoid arthritis or Lupus. I have some strange thyriditis. Hashimotos? Whatever it is, there's a medicine for all the spasms so I'm feeling quite good most days. I'll take it! So many people have much worse going on daily and I have bigger fish to fry. Onward & upward!
3. I am thankful that my weekly Bible study started back up last night & it was quite an interesting discussion about the book of Daniel, angels & the whole realm of heavenlies fighting around us, FOR us. I'm looking forward to the day I can read the book "This Present Darkness" to my boys out loud. I think I'm going to re-read it for myself now. That book was life changing in the way I looked at our lives here on earth & my spiritual connection to God. Thank you Luke Pyron for loaning me the book & introducing it to me many moons ago.
4. I am quite thankful to finally have talked to Dr. M. Son#2's doctor at Camelot. Although I have never met her in person, I can now say I've spoken to her. I do feel she is competent, however I did get the impression she's someone that isn't always listening to us "parental experts". (How could we not be? We lived with our kids 24/7 YEARS longer than they've known them!) But for now, she's listening enough. Last night they called to tell me she FINALLY got to look in his ears and one has some pink tinged drainage. So they wanted permission to start him on anti-biotic.
I'm glad they stopped thinking he was nicking his ear with a fingernail & listened to the Mama Bear that there was something really going on.
5. God keeps whispering to me that fear is from Satan. And if Satan tries to shake you with something new & it doesn't work, he'll go back to what he KNOWS works on you.
I wear two bracelets as reminders, every time I put on my watch. One says "EXPECT MIRACLES". And the other is Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD "plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
6. I have a cousin getting some help in a facility in Missouri for addiction & such issues. I'm SO pleased & very thankful for him to be accepting help & look forward to seeing his gentle, heart more present in his family's life.
7. We get to go do a therapy with son#2 this Saturday afternoon. It's because Lolly wants us to see son#2 working & behaving with Toya. It'll be a long afternoon/evening, but I'm looking forward to it. We've worked up to a 4 hour long pass now so we get to take him to eat dinner & we're going to try bowling. Wish us luck--first time to attempt that with the kiddos!
8. Ying & Yang. Sometimes I'm Ying & other days I'm Yang. What I appreciate without waver is that whatever kind of day I'm having, either Ying or Yang---my husband is having the other. As infuriating as our differences are to me at times, I do realize it's a "good thing" as Martha Stewart says. When I was so down about son#2---he picked me up. He was rational & all kinds of annoying logical male , while my heart was ruling my thoughts, he was able to be the strong one. I think it's kind of cool the way that works out.
9. Thank you God for entertainment like books, TV & movies/Netflix, games & puzzles. Without it, I'm not sure I would have been able to relax through the holidays as much as I was. It was a nice way to escape reality for a bit and try to take my mind off anything & everything.
10. And last but by far the very most important ---the thing I'm most thankful for, is all of my friends & family. Every single one from acquaintances, cyber buddies and lifers------THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. I would NEVER have made it through the holidays & the toughest times recently without all those prayers & kind thoughts from all of you. It's been a very touching thing when I get down in the dumps, to realize how many people have sent cards, emails, notes & in-person told me how much they care, wish us the best, spend their own time in prayer & just genuine love I've felt. I can't even begin to describe the kindness. I probably don't deserve it but I will take it as the gift from God it is and pray it continues!
2. I'm thankful to feel 100% physically better now. You can handle things so much better mentally when you physically feel better & I'm sure not taking that for granted. Test results back, and I don't have rheumatoid arthritis or Lupus. I have some strange thyriditis. Hashimotos? Whatever it is, there's a medicine for all the spasms so I'm feeling quite good most days. I'll take it! So many people have much worse going on daily and I have bigger fish to fry. Onward & upward!
3. I am thankful that my weekly Bible study started back up last night & it was quite an interesting discussion about the book of Daniel, angels & the whole realm of heavenlies fighting around us, FOR us. I'm looking forward to the day I can read the book "This Present Darkness" to my boys out loud. I think I'm going to re-read it for myself now. That book was life changing in the way I looked at our lives here on earth & my spiritual connection to God. Thank you Luke Pyron for loaning me the book & introducing it to me many moons ago.
4. I am quite thankful to finally have talked to Dr. M. Son#2's doctor at Camelot. Although I have never met her in person, I can now say I've spoken to her. I do feel she is competent, however I did get the impression she's someone that isn't always listening to us "parental experts". (How could we not be? We lived with our kids 24/7 YEARS longer than they've known them!) But for now, she's listening enough. Last night they called to tell me she FINALLY got to look in his ears and one has some pink tinged drainage. So they wanted permission to start him on anti-biotic.
I'm glad they stopped thinking he was nicking his ear with a fingernail & listened to the Mama Bear that there was something really going on.
5. God keeps whispering to me that fear is from Satan. And if Satan tries to shake you with something new & it doesn't work, he'll go back to what he KNOWS works on you.
I wear two bracelets as reminders, every time I put on my watch. One says "EXPECT MIRACLES". And the other is Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD "plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
6. I have a cousin getting some help in a facility in Missouri for addiction & such issues. I'm SO pleased & very thankful for him to be accepting help & look forward to seeing his gentle, heart more present in his family's life.
7. We get to go do a therapy with son#2 this Saturday afternoon. It's because Lolly wants us to see son#2 working & behaving with Toya. It'll be a long afternoon/evening, but I'm looking forward to it. We've worked up to a 4 hour long pass now so we get to take him to eat dinner & we're going to try bowling. Wish us luck--first time to attempt that with the kiddos!
8. Ying & Yang. Sometimes I'm Ying & other days I'm Yang. What I appreciate without waver is that whatever kind of day I'm having, either Ying or Yang---my husband is having the other. As infuriating as our differences are to me at times, I do realize it's a "good thing" as Martha Stewart says. When I was so down about son#2---he picked me up. He was rational & all kinds of annoying logical male , while my heart was ruling my thoughts, he was able to be the strong one. I think it's kind of cool the way that works out.
9. Thank you God for entertainment like books, TV & movies/Netflix, games & puzzles. Without it, I'm not sure I would have been able to relax through the holidays as much as I was. It was a nice way to escape reality for a bit and try to take my mind off anything & everything.
10. And last but by far the very most important ---the thing I'm most thankful for, is all of my friends & family. Every single one from acquaintances, cyber buddies and lifers------THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. I would NEVER have made it through the holidays & the toughest times recently without all those prayers & kind thoughts from all of you. It's been a very touching thing when I get down in the dumps, to realize how many people have sent cards, emails, notes & in-person told me how much they care, wish us the best, spend their own time in prayer & just genuine love I've felt. I can't even begin to describe the kindness. I probably don't deserve it but I will take it as the gift from God it is and pray it continues!
Wednesday, January 04, 2012
Good-Bye and Good Riddance 2011!
What a turbulent month December was! The usual busy of Christmas was afoot as well as three trips to OKC to see our boy.
In those four weeks we had three "holds" and TWO self-inflicted goose eggs on the middle of his forehead. One golf ball sized, the other (done to himself this Monday) tennis ball sized. It was shocking to see the golf ball one on Christmas Eve & scratches he had on his face from another child there in his unit. But apparently when we left something happened. Weekend help is not as up on the procedures or follow-thru. But weekend HOLIDAY help....I think is much less trustworthy.
When we came to visit this past Friday (30th) we were taken to a new administrator office to meet with the director and Lolly. Apparently the bruises on the tops of son#2's thighs were WAY worse than they mentioned in a phone call.
And they were unexplained. Nothing had been reported that weekend of Christmas. So the bruises were most likely inflicted either by son#2 or a roommate/staff. They just failed to report it so they were not discovered until Monday. The bruises were in an area that is difficult to conclude how it could have been accidental. It's almost as if he was was standing up and someone hit him across the front of the thighs with a 4x6 board.
There is an investigation going on right now & it was reported to a state agency that records these things. They are doing an in-house investigation & are interviewing all involved as well as having written up the workers that weekend for not reporting the incident.
Reality set in late Friday night (30th) and I was barely able to sleep. The reality is, as a mother my worst nightmare could possibly have happened. That we sent him there for help, and someone hurt him & he can't tell us. It breaks your heart.
It's taken this long for me to be able to discuss it whether in writing, out loud or mentally processing it, without crying.
It's rough to think because son#2 can't speak, we may never know what exactly happened. Or if it's a possibility to happen again. We trust the staff that is there 99% of the time. But sadly, I'm still hoping for some blood disorder or such thing. Which we're still looking into.
We're in the middle of discussing if his meds are interacting with one another & causing some extra aggression. It cannot be good for him to have several goose eggs in the same place, aka trauma to his forehead, in the matter of 6 months time.
It just can't. They do neuro checks afterwards, but still. I'm beginning to think we need to buy him an NFL quarterback helmet.
During all this I've struggled physically as well. With an infection that's just now over. And now a bad reaction to the latest antibiotics I'm taking. So needless to say I don't feel a hundred percent mentally or physically to deal with all of this.
I keep reminding myself, trust that God has a plan. While I do not doubt this for one minute, it's difficult to keep one's spirits up when you close your eyes & face the thoughts of the what-if's.
I'm slowly digging out of all this, but it's very overwhelming.
I still don't want to talk about it--too fresh. But thanks so much to you ALL for the thoughts, prayers & well wishes. We appreciate them all. A friend of mine keeps praying for a "hedge of protection" around son#2. I love that. That's all I want. Thank you to our friends and we appreciate the patience & perseverance you've had enduring this with us. He *is* making some good progress so I hope & pray 2012 is much better to our son.
Wednesday, December 07, 2011
Good News & Bad
I realize it's been around Thanksgiving since the last update. 'Tis the season & all that jazz. Add in doctor & dentist appointments, holiday parties starting & regular things like church...well, not much time to sit down, much less blog.
Our time with son#2 the day before Thanksgiving was just wonderful. I couldn't have asked for anything other than another t-shirt. (He was wearing the same one he wore the last time we visited.) And he *did* have a new owie on his forehead.
He has made some progress with which we are so pleased with. We are stunned to see him work in therapy with a puzzle. Lolly asks him for each animal & varies it up in no particular order & son#2 can hand the piece to her. This may sound small but I assure you it isn't!
He can also put them back in the correct place as she calls them out.
The brothers truly enjoyed their time together.
Son#2 is also topped out on his ADHD meds. This is more good news because he is doing well on them. The school teacher he has emailed me that he can focus for much longer periods of time now & get things accomplished that are asked of him.Even Lolly can get him to sit through a one-on-one therapy session for 20 minutes before he tries to get up.
However, this means he is currently taking/on four meds counting Zyrtek. And they seem in no hurry to remove that one for some reason either.
Lolly called last Wednesday for our weekly phone therapy session and told me the staff is reporting some crying spells son#2 is having. They are finding nothing to be the cause so they believe him to be missing us & depressed. THAT is heartbreaking. My stomach & heart both sank. They want to put him on an anti-depressant. I was immeditely skeptical. All I've read & seen in the news about these type of drugs in kids, seems to lead to bad end results. Like suicide attempts.
I had to give verbal consent but Lolly assured me that was a different branch of anti-depressants & the one they would use would be mild and he would be observed 24 hrs a day.
Maybe that bring more comfort if I knew they were totally responsible & trustworthy with things...like say, clothing.
Double edge sword---I don't want my baby crying & sad. To think he's having (hormones too) feelings of confusion, loneliness or sadness & can't express them almost breaks me. Some people try to tell me he wouldn't know he's away from us. He does. Believe me when I say some of his thought processes are behind in development but he DOES miss his family.
It *is* a sad thing being away from family & with strangers. It's not the warmest environment. But to trust there won't be a bad reaction like I've seen from him with meds in the past....there's the rub.
It boils down to trust. In God above all & that Camelot will indeed keep an eye on him. He's already trying to run his head into things. And they've kept that from going further, so I guess it's worth trying. The poor baby's been in a "hold" several times in the past few weeks. One time lasted 19 minutes. That just kills me to think of him on the floor, with people on top of him holding his down on his stomach until he calms down.
So I said yes to the anti-depressant. We'll see. Lolly calls tomorrow for an update. Been a rough week. I've barely gotten to talk to him on the phone. They either aren't answering the several times I call or he won't "talk" back to me.
And the bad of the bad news is, son#2 won't be able to be home for Christmas. I can't talk much more about that. I'm trying to keep busy so I don't have to think about it. Sure he doesn't know what day it is, but he'll see a lot of other kids leaving with their families on a pass. We just haven't worked up to that amount of time yet.
So:
Good---progress with ADHD med and it's working & learning his puzzles.
Bad---needs fifth drug, an anti-depressant & can't come home for Christmas.
So hug those kiddos--grown & small tight this Christmas. I'd never have thought a year ago that my nest would be minus one this holiday season.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Ten Things Thursday--Gobble, Gobble!!
Ten Things Thursday
1. I am so very thankful I got to spend yesterday with ALL of my family.
2. We always have weather on Thanksgiving that doesn't require scarves & snow boots. (Usually it's shorts.) As much as I adore winter weather, it's much easier to transport food, when you're not worried about killing yourself on the sidewalk.
3. This is the first Thanksgiving since we had only TWO chitlins and they were in highchairs, that Hubbo and I can sit down--SIT DOWN--to eat. We won't have to rush. Hubbo won't have to stand outside and feed son#2 standing up or share his food with him. And I don't have to rush around refilling son#3's plates. I might even talk to people. I am seriously thankful for this.
4. I am a very thankful that my children all have tender hearts & care about other people's feelings. Most of the time.
5. What good food my family can fix!! You have no idea how good my Grandma Bible's dressing is. And everyone has something that's their thing. I'm thankful that we all get to eat as much as we want today where I know in some places, some people don't get that luxury. I better eat extra today.
6. What cool people have taught my children over the years! We ran into Ms. Ann, the paraprofessional from son#1's elementary school days. She was so excited to see us and catch up with our family. I know there's no way every teacher can be as close to each student but I appreciate & am thankful those that have worked with our family, are.
7. I'm thankful we got to ride in more comfortable space to OKC yesterday & to Pryor today. Thanks to a friend who GAVE us a put-put car. It's a very well kept church lady car. I'll take it! No car payments--another thanksgiving! Saving moo-la right now is important while son#2 is away. I am sort of waiting for the other shoe to drop with the cost of Camelot. We all know castles ain't cheap!!
8. Sounds silly but I'm so happy the major stores decided to start Black Friday shopping at 10pm-Midnight. I'd rather just stay awake then get up at 4am.
9. I'm thankful for toys. Let's be honest. It makes traveling easier or keeping them out of my hair while I bake. Yay toys!!
10. While son#2 is away, the brothers are getting to have their own rooms/space. With them being 13-1/2 yrs old and 5-1/2 yrs old--I am GRATEFUL they are out from under each other. I've convinced myself they argue less now.
1. I am so very thankful I got to spend yesterday with ALL of my family.
2. We always have weather on Thanksgiving that doesn't require scarves & snow boots. (Usually it's shorts.) As much as I adore winter weather, it's much easier to transport food, when you're not worried about killing yourself on the sidewalk.
3. This is the first Thanksgiving since we had only TWO chitlins and they were in highchairs, that Hubbo and I can sit down--SIT DOWN--to eat. We won't have to rush. Hubbo won't have to stand outside and feed son#2 standing up or share his food with him. And I don't have to rush around refilling son#3's plates. I might even talk to people. I am seriously thankful for this.
4. I am a very thankful that my children all have tender hearts & care about other people's feelings. Most of the time.
5. What good food my family can fix!! You have no idea how good my Grandma Bible's dressing is. And everyone has something that's their thing. I'm thankful that we all get to eat as much as we want today where I know in some places, some people don't get that luxury. I better eat extra today.
6. What cool people have taught my children over the years! We ran into Ms. Ann, the paraprofessional from son#1's elementary school days. She was so excited to see us and catch up with our family. I know there's no way every teacher can be as close to each student but I appreciate & am thankful those that have worked with our family, are.
7. I'm thankful we got to ride in more comfortable space to OKC yesterday & to Pryor today. Thanks to a friend who GAVE us a put-put car. It's a very well kept church lady car. I'll take it! No car payments--another thanksgiving! Saving moo-la right now is important while son#2 is away. I am sort of waiting for the other shoe to drop with the cost of Camelot. We all know castles ain't cheap!!
8. Sounds silly but I'm so happy the major stores decided to start Black Friday shopping at 10pm-Midnight. I'd rather just stay awake then get up at 4am.
9. I'm thankful for toys. Let's be honest. It makes traveling easier or keeping them out of my hair while I bake. Yay toys!!
10. While son#2 is away, the brothers are getting to have their own rooms/space. With them being 13-1/2 yrs old and 5-1/2 yrs old--I am GRATEFUL they are out from under each other. I've convinced myself they argue less now.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
New Things, Good Things
New Things,Good Things
Lolly called today since we won't be there in person this week for therapy.
Her updates on son#2 were encouraging and she had some funny stuff to tell me.
Seems son#2 is getting good at putting his shoes on by himself & keeping them on for longer periods of time. (20 mins) Those who know us, know this was a big, big deal. And we're on the third pair of shoes since he's been down there. These are velcro and easier for him to figure out.
When trying to work with son#2, LaToya had been letting him slap her hand as in "Give me five!". But after a bit she started yanking her hand back so he'd miss, and son#2 thought this was hilarious. Then he figured he'd use his other hand to hold her hand still so he could hit it. After she started moving her whole arm back & after he had a giggle fit, son#2 used his other hand to hold her whole arm still so he could slap her hand. GREAT problem solving skills!! Now if we could just channel that into motivation to learn other things...like potty training.
We did get the "mood med" moved down from 8pm to 5pm. That's still progress I guess.
They are finding it easier to give him all the meds together---ADHD, the "mood med" and the Zyrtek. They mostly all have to be in food so I suppose I understand.
I suggested putting it in his afternoon snack but those are usually 100 calorie packs of crackers, chips or cookies so they can't mix the liquid/powder meds in.
Son#2 has had a few scratching aggression issues this week but no episodes requiring holds. WHEW! That makes Mama Bird happy.
He also hitting a good stage with the toileting process. Son#2 doesn't want any Pull-Ups on that are wet or anything else. He takes them off immediately. Which at least it's a closed campus & not in public, right?
It's the small things.
I had concerns that son#2 might get bored over the weekends, but they went to see the Smurf movie last weekend and this Sunday they have an outing so there can be a deep clean on his unit. I also inquired about getting son#2's cottage a therapy ball or two ($12 a piece) or a mini-trampoline ($35). Lolly said they could have the balls & may wait until it's too cold to do their Fit Walks outside. At least with the ball I could put his name on one in big letters so they couldn't loos that right?
She did mention they might pop them but I know how much son#2 loved his ball at home, so I'd love to see him have something he enjoys to occupy him on weekends especially. Lolly has to see about permission for the trampoline. Here's hoping!!
It sounds like to me that the past parents haven't been very involved and Camelot isn't used to having donations or people who help too much.
I'm looking forward to shaking things up a bit & puttin' some sunshine up in there! WHO'S WITH ME??!?!?!
Lolly called today since we won't be there in person this week for therapy.
Her updates on son#2 were encouraging and she had some funny stuff to tell me.
Seems son#2 is getting good at putting his shoes on by himself & keeping them on for longer periods of time. (20 mins) Those who know us, know this was a big, big deal. And we're on the third pair of shoes since he's been down there. These are velcro and easier for him to figure out.
When trying to work with son#2, LaToya had been letting him slap her hand as in "Give me five!". But after a bit she started yanking her hand back so he'd miss, and son#2 thought this was hilarious. Then he figured he'd use his other hand to hold her hand still so he could hit it. After she started moving her whole arm back & after he had a giggle fit, son#2 used his other hand to hold her whole arm still so he could slap her hand. GREAT problem solving skills!! Now if we could just channel that into motivation to learn other things...like potty training.
We did get the "mood med" moved down from 8pm to 5pm. That's still progress I guess.
They are finding it easier to give him all the meds together---ADHD, the "mood med" and the Zyrtek. They mostly all have to be in food so I suppose I understand.
I suggested putting it in his afternoon snack but those are usually 100 calorie packs of crackers, chips or cookies so they can't mix the liquid/powder meds in.
Son#2 has had a few scratching aggression issues this week but no episodes requiring holds. WHEW! That makes Mama Bird happy.
He also hitting a good stage with the toileting process. Son#2 doesn't want any Pull-Ups on that are wet or anything else. He takes them off immediately. Which at least it's a closed campus & not in public, right?
It's the small things.
I had concerns that son#2 might get bored over the weekends, but they went to see the Smurf movie last weekend and this Sunday they have an outing so there can be a deep clean on his unit. I also inquired about getting son#2's cottage a therapy ball or two ($12 a piece) or a mini-trampoline ($35). Lolly said they could have the balls & may wait until it's too cold to do their Fit Walks outside. At least with the ball I could put his name on one in big letters so they couldn't loos that right?
She did mention they might pop them but I know how much son#2 loved his ball at home, so I'd love to see him have something he enjoys to occupy him on weekends especially. Lolly has to see about permission for the trampoline. Here's hoping!!
It sounds like to me that the past parents haven't been very involved and Camelot isn't used to having donations or people who help too much.
I'm looking forward to shaking things up a bit & puttin' some sunshine up in there! WHO'S WITH ME??!?!?!
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Frustration
It's been an interesting, sort of stressful few weeks since I last blogged. I truly hesitate to use the word stressful, because on the scale of stress we've experienced, it's not really anywhere near the end of unbearable. So it's difficult for me to come up with the right answer when people ask how things are.
DO NOT GET ME WRONG, I appreciate so much people asking how son#2 is, but it's not a black & white answer. And we all know how much we love to hear "Fine", and go on.
So please be patient with me, if I stutter, stammer or look like a deer in the headlights when you ask for an update.
** Nov. 2 we started a new med--an ADHD med. It appears to have NOT given a bad reaction yet so we're very hopeful. Usually we see a bad reaction to meds right off the bat. He could really use the ability to focus so he is able to learn more of what they can offer at Camelot. So far we have no real progress because they are unable to really get him to focus or give attention to task.
**In our weekly therapy phone call early last week, Lolly mentioned that son#2's "mood med" is given at 8am & 8pm. Now, here at home, when he was doing so well on this "mood med", he was taking it per doctor's orders at 7:30am when he got up & at 2-3pm in the afternoon. You could tell when it was sort of wearing off. And in the mornings he was great about taking it with his orange juice first thing after he got up. So by the time we were getting dressed for school. he was cooperative.
According to Lolly they ONLY give meds at 8am & 8pm. Now, son#2 gets up around 7 or earlier in the morning & goes to bed around 7:30pm.
So I'm thinking, a) Why can't you give it to him in the afternoon because by 8pm he's in bed?! Who needs to be in a good mood in bed? b)Wouldn't it be easier on HIM (and you) if he gets it before he has a chance to get grumpy? and c) He can NOT be the only kid there that needs meds besides at 8am & 8pm. Personally I think this is their way of being lazy about meds. Now if the Dr. says it doesn't matter WHEN the meds build up in his system, I'll go along with it. But this smells of laziness to me--on the part of the nurses. I mean come on, this IS their job description. There's one for every cottage--what ARE they doing between 8am-8pm???
**They clipped son#2's nails & got one too close that bled for a very long time. They acted shocked he wouldn't let them stop the bleeding. I wasn't.
A few years ago, he found a green bean can in the kitchen trash & cut his finger on it. THAT was something of an ordeal. Scary. It bled for over an hour & we chased him around trying to put pressure on it & see how deep of a cut it was. He finally ended up in our bed where he sat still in the bedding long enough for the bleeding to stop. When we had called the EMT's, they had nothing to offer & didn't even approach him to look at it. They blew us off saying it happens a lot with kids & pop cans. By the time we got to the doctor the next day, it was too late for stitches.
Son#2 reopened the fingernail owie the next day & it bled all over again. Even though there's nothing I could have done, it stinks to not be there when your child hurts. Or bleeds. That weighs on me & stays on my mind awhile. He's a tough, tough kid, but he still gets scared.
**Like they had to put him in a "hold" the other day because he came in from outside (on one of our hotter days) and he'd been on a "Fit Walk" in a t-shirt, sweats & hoodie. He got into his room & couldn't get his clothes off fast enough & stripped down. Which he isn't allowed to do. So he got mad, they ended up taking him down to the ground. For a hold--they put him on his belly & one person lays across his arms& one across the legs & if necessary (if they'll headbutt the floor) they have someone hold their head still. He understandably freaked out. (I freaked out hearing this.) and was scared. They realized quickly (Thank goodness!) that son#2 didn't understand what he was supposed to do or not do, so they released him. A worker figured out it was too hot in the cottage & to him and they took care of getting him cooled down.
I had told them in the five hour check-in process the day he came, HE DOES NOT LIKE TO GET TOO HOT. It turns him into the Hulk. I think he gets this from me. And his "Hunger Monster" as Hubbo calls it.
**The other night I called SIX times. The calls are supposed to be kept between 6:30pm to 8pm. Well I called at 6:30--he was in the shower would I call back in ten minutes. Sure--I called back in 15 minutes.
"Ms. S, he's getting dressed, will you call back in ten minutes?"
Sure---called back in 15 minutes---no answer.
Called right back in case they couldn't get to the phone...no answer. Called in ten minutes, no answer. Waited five minutes, called again--no answer.
I stopped by 8pm because I knew he was in bed. THIS is what is frustrating. I can no longer get as many verbal updates from the actual people that take care of him, but when I do call to hear his voice, they don't pick up.
** We did meet son#2's teacher---he seems like a good egg. And he again mentioned our son's lack of focus. Which I told him, has been in the last 3 yrs. He used to have much more attention to things. But he is able to make him work for M&M's sometimes. Which is pretty much the only motivational leverage they all have. But always nice to meet somebody & be on the same page.
**When we visited last Friday night with son#2, we didn't get to see much of him. The therapy session didn't include him. But we did get several things taken care of with Lolly that we needed straightened out. However, we had an hour/half to visit with him afterwards. It can only be done in the cafeteria though. Which was NOT clean. The floor was a mine field of food. And son#2 saw we were there for dinner#2.
With no focus he paces around & doesn't want to sit & play with us. Not that there's much place to play, just tables/chairs. What we noticed were other families coming in & bringing laptops, dvd players and toys/snacks to entertain the kids for the hour and a half. We ended up with son#2 bored & wanting to walk/pace outside in the cold & then going to his cottage early. He knew it was time for snack/movie. But he doesn't get that we can't come in there with him. Very difficult to give up extra time with him, but we are learning.
We go visit this Wednesday the 23rd---and the brothers are going with us. We'll have therapy & then take him out to lunch. He doesn't get to come home for Thanksgiving.
And Christmas is still up in the air. I'm just hoping he's not too bored over the Thanksgiving weekend. I worry the most on the weekends because the staff seems less attentive & like they just don't keep them entertained as well.
So if you're the praying sort, I'd ask you pray for his care givers/staff---that they have patience, love & kindness towards him.
Pray Carson isn't bored, lonely or scared. And that he cooperates & is patient with his workers.
Pray the new "focus med" works & soon. Pray for us here at home that will miss that part of our family over the holiday weekend.
Thank you for caring. Really.
DO NOT GET ME WRONG, I appreciate so much people asking how son#2 is, but it's not a black & white answer. And we all know how much we love to hear "Fine", and go on.
So please be patient with me, if I stutter, stammer or look like a deer in the headlights when you ask for an update.
** Nov. 2 we started a new med--an ADHD med. It appears to have NOT given a bad reaction yet so we're very hopeful. Usually we see a bad reaction to meds right off the bat. He could really use the ability to focus so he is able to learn more of what they can offer at Camelot. So far we have no real progress because they are unable to really get him to focus or give attention to task.
**In our weekly therapy phone call early last week, Lolly mentioned that son#2's "mood med" is given at 8am & 8pm. Now, here at home, when he was doing so well on this "mood med", he was taking it per doctor's orders at 7:30am when he got up & at 2-3pm in the afternoon. You could tell when it was sort of wearing off. And in the mornings he was great about taking it with his orange juice first thing after he got up. So by the time we were getting dressed for school. he was cooperative.
According to Lolly they ONLY give meds at 8am & 8pm. Now, son#2 gets up around 7 or earlier in the morning & goes to bed around 7:30pm.
So I'm thinking, a) Why can't you give it to him in the afternoon because by 8pm he's in bed?! Who needs to be in a good mood in bed? b)Wouldn't it be easier on HIM (and you) if he gets it before he has a chance to get grumpy? and c) He can NOT be the only kid there that needs meds besides at 8am & 8pm. Personally I think this is their way of being lazy about meds. Now if the Dr. says it doesn't matter WHEN the meds build up in his system, I'll go along with it. But this smells of laziness to me--on the part of the nurses. I mean come on, this IS their job description. There's one for every cottage--what ARE they doing between 8am-8pm???
**They clipped son#2's nails & got one too close that bled for a very long time. They acted shocked he wouldn't let them stop the bleeding. I wasn't.
A few years ago, he found a green bean can in the kitchen trash & cut his finger on it. THAT was something of an ordeal. Scary. It bled for over an hour & we chased him around trying to put pressure on it & see how deep of a cut it was. He finally ended up in our bed where he sat still in the bedding long enough for the bleeding to stop. When we had called the EMT's, they had nothing to offer & didn't even approach him to look at it. They blew us off saying it happens a lot with kids & pop cans. By the time we got to the doctor the next day, it was too late for stitches.
Son#2 reopened the fingernail owie the next day & it bled all over again. Even though there's nothing I could have done, it stinks to not be there when your child hurts. Or bleeds. That weighs on me & stays on my mind awhile. He's a tough, tough kid, but he still gets scared.
**Like they had to put him in a "hold" the other day because he came in from outside (on one of our hotter days) and he'd been on a "Fit Walk" in a t-shirt, sweats & hoodie. He got into his room & couldn't get his clothes off fast enough & stripped down. Which he isn't allowed to do. So he got mad, they ended up taking him down to the ground. For a hold--they put him on his belly & one person lays across his arms& one across the legs & if necessary (if they'll headbutt the floor) they have someone hold their head still. He understandably freaked out. (I freaked out hearing this.) and was scared. They realized quickly (Thank goodness!) that son#2 didn't understand what he was supposed to do or not do, so they released him. A worker figured out it was too hot in the cottage & to him and they took care of getting him cooled down.
I had told them in the five hour check-in process the day he came, HE DOES NOT LIKE TO GET TOO HOT. It turns him into the Hulk. I think he gets this from me. And his "Hunger Monster" as Hubbo calls it.
**The other night I called SIX times. The calls are supposed to be kept between 6:30pm to 8pm. Well I called at 6:30--he was in the shower would I call back in ten minutes. Sure--I called back in 15 minutes.
"Ms. S, he's getting dressed, will you call back in ten minutes?"
Sure---called back in 15 minutes---no answer.
Called right back in case they couldn't get to the phone...no answer. Called in ten minutes, no answer. Waited five minutes, called again--no answer.
I stopped by 8pm because I knew he was in bed. THIS is what is frustrating. I can no longer get as many verbal updates from the actual people that take care of him, but when I do call to hear his voice, they don't pick up.
** We did meet son#2's teacher---he seems like a good egg. And he again mentioned our son's lack of focus. Which I told him, has been in the last 3 yrs. He used to have much more attention to things. But he is able to make him work for M&M's sometimes. Which is pretty much the only motivational leverage they all have. But always nice to meet somebody & be on the same page.
**When we visited last Friday night with son#2, we didn't get to see much of him. The therapy session didn't include him. But we did get several things taken care of with Lolly that we needed straightened out. However, we had an hour/half to visit with him afterwards. It can only be done in the cafeteria though. Which was NOT clean. The floor was a mine field of food. And son#2 saw we were there for dinner#2.
With no focus he paces around & doesn't want to sit & play with us. Not that there's much place to play, just tables/chairs. What we noticed were other families coming in & bringing laptops, dvd players and toys/snacks to entertain the kids for the hour and a half. We ended up with son#2 bored & wanting to walk/pace outside in the cold & then going to his cottage early. He knew it was time for snack/movie. But he doesn't get that we can't come in there with him. Very difficult to give up extra time with him, but we are learning.
We go visit this Wednesday the 23rd---and the brothers are going with us. We'll have therapy & then take him out to lunch. He doesn't get to come home for Thanksgiving.
And Christmas is still up in the air. I'm just hoping he's not too bored over the Thanksgiving weekend. I worry the most on the weekends because the staff seems less attentive & like they just don't keep them entertained as well.
So if you're the praying sort, I'd ask you pray for his care givers/staff---that they have patience, love & kindness towards him.
Pray Carson isn't bored, lonely or scared. And that he cooperates & is patient with his workers.
Pray the new "focus med" works & soon. Pray for us here at home that will miss that part of our family over the holiday weekend.
Thank you for caring. Really.
Wednesday, November 02, 2011
Halloween
Halloween was entirely too long this year. It needs to just forever be on a weekend night & be done with it. I'm too old to chase kids & do party stuff for days on end! What is this, college?! Don't they know my metabolism is not in the 20 yr old category anymore? And right on the heels of Red Ribbon week where each kid is wearing different from the other, every day of the ding dong week.
That said, the Fall Festival at church was great. HUGE turnout this year and what a lot of energy from the church members. I was completely impressed. I think it was a great outreach because I saw as many strangers as people I recognized. Son#3 had a friend come and they played till they dropped. While son#1 has impressed me with his completely normal (yet still literal) teenagery behavior. I went over to him to see if he was having a good time & he said:
"Please don't talk to me. I don't want to stand with you." *Sigh!* Yep, he's 13.
Halloween night was a bit sad for me, I felt a piece of our family puzzle was missing & it just wasn't as fun for me. But son#1 went as Darth Vader while son#2 went as a Jedi from the Light side of the Force.
They really enjoyed all parts of Halloween and son#1 even brought his own theme music around with him. *sigh!* That was a nice surprise Hubbo discovered when the first door opened. He did get compliments & we all probably secretly want our own theme music to play as we walk down the street.
*Note to self, back off the pumping up of his self-esteem.
Hubbo took them around the neighborhood Trick-Or-Treating while I stayed in (I lost my voice & have a sinus infection.)and called son#2 at Camelot.
Son#2 got to do Trunk or Treat at one of the director's church down the road. I believe it was the Holiness Tabernacle Baptist church so there may have possibly been some extra "ghosts" around.
For his costume Lolly said that they made t-shirts for the kids according to their personality.
One boy who likes to rip his shirts off (watched wrestling too much I imagine) got a green t-shirt that said: HULK.
Son#2 LOVES to sniff things. Lotion, soap, cleaner, etc. And heaven forbid you're chewing gum, put on smelly chapstick, have a mint in your mouth or his fav--just drank some coffee.
He has no personal space issues with takin' a big ol' whiff of your breath.
So his t-shirt they made said "Scratch & Sniff".
I miss that kid.
Thank goodness we don't have to dress up or do anything but EAT for the next holiday.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Trip Update
We got to go visit son#2 at "camp" this Saturday. And a 2 hr pass to take him to
lunch after "therapy".
**As a side note for the reader, I will refer to our mandatory trips to Rose Rock from here on out as "therapy".**
So far I've not found anything that's helping us or Carson in these sessions
yet. Sure we get information on his week or weeks, but it's nothing they couldn't
convey over the phone. So I'm not sure this constitutes REAL therapy yet.
I personally, pictured these as sessions we would be learning techniques for how
to handle situations that arise in the care & changes of caring for son#2. Not so far.
This week's "therapy" was spent mostly discussing a big bite son#2 incurred on
his right forearm after we left LAST Friday evening. It seems his roomate got
angry & bit him. When I saw it, it was a large softball sized green faded bruise. Lolly mentioned it as black the day she saw it. Now, we know how quickly things can happen with kids. It goes by in front of your face in slow motion &
you just can't get there in time. But for us not to be informed about it until
TUESDAY, got the mother hen in me up & running.
Turns out he and the roommate are supposed to both have 1:1 ratio of staff. So there SHOULD have been SOMEONE there to see it.If I understand it correctly, one of the boys staff (or both?) went to dinner without telling anyone else. Which left the boys alone. And although they took him to the nurse right away, it wasn't really reported. So we didn't get a call until Tuesday night.
Lolly (as I'm gonna call her) the therapist, said that someone DID get written up & higher ups took care of addressing the situation so it won't happen again.
Son#2's stuffy nose is a tad better but it's sad that they aren't listening to me on antihistamines interacting with his regular meds and making him angry. Like Hulk angry. So angry in fact, that he ran his head at the window Thursday night. He had a green goose egg when we saw him Saturday. *sigh!*
I've told the nurse in person when we checked him in & went through everything about meds & behavior with her. She even took notes. Then when we were there last Friday I told the same nurse in person again. She even made grunts that she understood. Yet she called me Thursday night while we were at the pumpkin patch and wondered why son#2 would be so aggressive out of the blue.
I'm beginning to think she's a visual learner that may need the PECS (picture exchange system) to get the message.
My sister-in-law told me we ought to make her a shirt that has instructions on it but with that being considered laundry, they'd probably just loose it.
Oh, on that issue of him not wearing his clothes & them not finding them, they were able to find them all after I sent an email asking how I was supposed to trust them with the care of my offspring if they couldn't even keep track of his clothes. Will wonders never cease!
We took son#2 to IHOP for a nice lunch & then to Wal-Mart to get a couple more long-sleeved shirts. He was a tad hyper and kept taking his shoes off. He even tried to run off in the parking lot & store.
The interesting part was when we go to take him on pass we have to strip him down for the nurse to write any bruises & marks down so they can tell what happens on who's shift of caring for him. And then when we return it's the same scenario but in addition to filing out paperwork about what we did & his behavior during the outing.
I told Hubbo this felt like jail. He joked when we brought him back that it was time to go get patted down to see if he had a shiv. (With his roommate the biter he may just need it! lol)
After two weekends back to back down there, we're looking forward to time at home this coming weekend & not being in the car as much.
**Thanks to the Updike family for watching sons#1 & 3 for us Saturday. And for waking yourselves at the butt crack of dawn to do it happily.**
lunch after "therapy".
**As a side note for the reader, I will refer to our mandatory trips to Rose Rock from here on out as "therapy".**
So far I've not found anything that's helping us or Carson in these sessions
yet. Sure we get information on his week or weeks, but it's nothing they couldn't
convey over the phone. So I'm not sure this constitutes REAL therapy yet.
I personally, pictured these as sessions we would be learning techniques for how
to handle situations that arise in the care & changes of caring for son#2. Not so far.
This week's "therapy" was spent mostly discussing a big bite son#2 incurred on
his right forearm after we left LAST Friday evening. It seems his roomate got
angry & bit him. When I saw it, it was a large softball sized green faded bruise. Lolly mentioned it as black the day she saw it. Now, we know how quickly things can happen with kids. It goes by in front of your face in slow motion &
you just can't get there in time. But for us not to be informed about it until
TUESDAY, got the mother hen in me up & running.
Turns out he and the roommate are supposed to both have 1:1 ratio of staff. So there SHOULD have been SOMEONE there to see it.If I understand it correctly, one of the boys staff (or both?) went to dinner without telling anyone else. Which left the boys alone. And although they took him to the nurse right away, it wasn't really reported. So we didn't get a call until Tuesday night.
Lolly (as I'm gonna call her) the therapist, said that someone DID get written up & higher ups took care of addressing the situation so it won't happen again.
Son#2's stuffy nose is a tad better but it's sad that they aren't listening to me on antihistamines interacting with his regular meds and making him angry. Like Hulk angry. So angry in fact, that he ran his head at the window Thursday night. He had a green goose egg when we saw him Saturday. *sigh!*
I've told the nurse in person when we checked him in & went through everything about meds & behavior with her. She even took notes. Then when we were there last Friday I told the same nurse in person again. She even made grunts that she understood. Yet she called me Thursday night while we were at the pumpkin patch and wondered why son#2 would be so aggressive out of the blue.
I'm beginning to think she's a visual learner that may need the PECS (picture exchange system) to get the message.
My sister-in-law told me we ought to make her a shirt that has instructions on it but with that being considered laundry, they'd probably just loose it.
Oh, on that issue of him not wearing his clothes & them not finding them, they were able to find them all after I sent an email asking how I was supposed to trust them with the care of my offspring if they couldn't even keep track of his clothes. Will wonders never cease!
We took son#2 to IHOP for a nice lunch & then to Wal-Mart to get a couple more long-sleeved shirts. He was a tad hyper and kept taking his shoes off. He even tried to run off in the parking lot & store.
The interesting part was when we go to take him on pass we have to strip him down for the nurse to write any bruises & marks down so they can tell what happens on who's shift of caring for him. And then when we return it's the same scenario but in addition to filing out paperwork about what we did & his behavior during the outing.
I told Hubbo this felt like jail. He joked when we brought him back that it was time to go get patted down to see if he had a shiv. (With his roommate the biter he may just need it! lol)
After two weekends back to back down there, we're looking forward to time at home this coming weekend & not being in the car as much.
**Thanks to the Updike family for watching sons#1 & 3 for us Saturday. And for waking yourselves at the butt crack of dawn to do it happily.**
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Ten Things Tuesday
The visit & therapy with Carson went okay Friday evening. And we did enjoy our anniversary plans, but boy are we exhausted. Mentally & physically.
Some things about the visit & this past few days haven't been so great...usually I'm an upbeat person but today is about some dissatisfaction so please bear with me.
And since there is no Congressional committee (shocking since there's one for every other occasion) that cares about my grievances, you lucky few get to hear my complaints.
Ten Things I'm Currently Displeased About:
1. Son#2 was wearing someone else's pants when we got to visit him Friday night. A tad shocking considering there's only one kid as big as him.
2. Therapist was just as I had pictured her matching her voice. Young, unmarried, no kids & rather naive. I don't need Nancy Nice, I need Greta Go-Getter. And she tried to tell us son#2 only had two pairs of shorts! What?! When we checked him in, he had 7+ pairs. And every piece of clothing had a big white laundry tag ironed in with his first & last name on it. *sigh!*
3. We dropped off more pants, a hoodie and two hats I knitted for him---by Saturday night they couldn't find them. Or the bag they came in that I did not intend to leave.
4. Son#2 had the worst stuffed up nose I've ever heard when we were there Friday night. He even had some weird tic sniffing thing he was doing we've never seen. And with a deviated septum already, we're afraid that this summer's headbutting spree could have complicated that situation. It was sad at how little air he was getting. At one point we were afraid he would pass out. Seriously.
Give him a decongestant you say? I wish. They react with the meds he takes & make him angry.
He does seem to be better but it was bad there for awhile. He was so pitiful.
5. We aren't getting much information. Unless LaToya is there, we don't talk to anyone. They just leave the phone on speaker for son#2 to listen to us. Last night he was giggly which was nice but no one to ask what he had for dinner or how his day was. Boo!
It's like the left hand doesn't talk to the right hand. I'm not sure they are even attached to the same body at this point.
6. I got a call this afternoon from the nurse that son#2 had a big bruise on his right forearm. It apparently happened right after we left Friday night. His roomate got angry & bit him. No idea why. And no one caught it till yesterday--weekend staff--but they were too busy yesterday to call me & inform me about it.
7. The weekend staff that we met, although older than me, seems to be like having teenagers babysit. They don't want to get in trouble or do anything helpful, they just want to get their paycheck and go home. At least this is how "Upset Mommy" is viewing things today through angry eyes.
8. The therapist informed us Friday that we need one more in person meeting before the end of this month. That just leaves THIS weekend. Back to back is pretty hard. But since it was her boo-boo, she decided to offer to come in Saturday morning and let us do therapy then so Hubbo doesn't miss any work.
Then we *do* get our first pass with son#2 and get to take him to lunch for a couple of hours. THAT is going to be the highlight of my week!!
9. Okay, okay...I got all the negative out & I'm not a gonna leave on a sad note. I'm just not wired that way.
I'm SUPER thankful my awesome Moms could come & stay with the kids this whole weekend. She had fun but had to endure A LOT of games, puzzles & books with son#3. I think she was very glad to get home but enjoyed her time with us.
And I know both the kids did.
And a funny son#1 story...
10. When we took my Moms to lunch after church Sunday, we chose an authentic Mexican restaurant. We had to stop and get son#1 some fries from Carl's Jr. to take with him to eat. You can totally tell we didn't/don't get out often because this was his observation--thankfully whispered(albeit loudly) to me.
After seeing the waiters take our drink & food orders, he leans over to me & says, "Why is that guy acting Mexican?"
Some things about the visit & this past few days haven't been so great...usually I'm an upbeat person but today is about some dissatisfaction so please bear with me.
And since there is no Congressional committee (shocking since there's one for every other occasion) that cares about my grievances, you lucky few get to hear my complaints.
Ten Things I'm Currently Displeased About:
1. Son#2 was wearing someone else's pants when we got to visit him Friday night. A tad shocking considering there's only one kid as big as him.
2. Therapist was just as I had pictured her matching her voice. Young, unmarried, no kids & rather naive. I don't need Nancy Nice, I need Greta Go-Getter. And she tried to tell us son#2 only had two pairs of shorts! What?! When we checked him in, he had 7+ pairs. And every piece of clothing had a big white laundry tag ironed in with his first & last name on it. *sigh!*
3. We dropped off more pants, a hoodie and two hats I knitted for him---by Saturday night they couldn't find them. Or the bag they came in that I did not intend to leave.
4. Son#2 had the worst stuffed up nose I've ever heard when we were there Friday night. He even had some weird tic sniffing thing he was doing we've never seen. And with a deviated septum already, we're afraid that this summer's headbutting spree could have complicated that situation. It was sad at how little air he was getting. At one point we were afraid he would pass out. Seriously.
Give him a decongestant you say? I wish. They react with the meds he takes & make him angry.
He does seem to be better but it was bad there for awhile. He was so pitiful.
5. We aren't getting much information. Unless LaToya is there, we don't talk to anyone. They just leave the phone on speaker for son#2 to listen to us. Last night he was giggly which was nice but no one to ask what he had for dinner or how his day was. Boo!
It's like the left hand doesn't talk to the right hand. I'm not sure they are even attached to the same body at this point.
6. I got a call this afternoon from the nurse that son#2 had a big bruise on his right forearm. It apparently happened right after we left Friday night. His roomate got angry & bit him. No idea why. And no one caught it till yesterday--weekend staff--but they were too busy yesterday to call me & inform me about it.
7. The weekend staff that we met, although older than me, seems to be like having teenagers babysit. They don't want to get in trouble or do anything helpful, they just want to get their paycheck and go home. At least this is how "Upset Mommy" is viewing things today through angry eyes.
8. The therapist informed us Friday that we need one more in person meeting before the end of this month. That just leaves THIS weekend. Back to back is pretty hard. But since it was her boo-boo, she decided to offer to come in Saturday morning and let us do therapy then so Hubbo doesn't miss any work.
Then we *do* get our first pass with son#2 and get to take him to lunch for a couple of hours. THAT is going to be the highlight of my week!!
9. Okay, okay...I got all the negative out & I'm not a gonna leave on a sad note. I'm just not wired that way.
I'm SUPER thankful my awesome Moms could come & stay with the kids this whole weekend. She had fun but had to endure A LOT of games, puzzles & books with son#3. I think she was very glad to get home but enjoyed her time with us.
And I know both the kids did.
And a funny son#1 story...
10. When we took my Moms to lunch after church Sunday, we chose an authentic Mexican restaurant. We had to stop and get son#1 some fries from Carl's Jr. to take with him to eat. You can totally tell we didn't/don't get out often because this was his observation--thankfully whispered(albeit loudly) to me.
After seeing the waiters take our drink & food orders, he leans over to me & says, "Why is that guy acting Mexican?"
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Happy Anniversary!
Today is our 14th wedding anniversary!! We have beaten some serious odds. The divorce rate for parents of Autistic children is 85%!!
No marriage is perfect because none of us have that privileged title individually. We're flawed humans just trying to make it work together. To me it feels good to have someone by your side, helping you fight, love & laugh through the hills & valleys. So good that sometimes you wanna strangle them in their sleep. (Did I say that out loud?)
Life is never easy for any one person and when you combine two people the baggage can sometimes overwhelm the union. For us it's all about having God guiding your decisions, family and friends to fall back on when you're not able to hold yourselves up, and being able to be yourself.
I don't have some secret key to making marriage work, I don't have really good advice other than be yourself. Be genuine and like yourself. Don't loose yourself. I think of it as we had security & confidence in ourselves when we were young & met, so if we keep that going, it's most likely attractive to the other person wouldn't you say? You give your husband time...you give your kids time & attention...why wouldn't God want you to give yourself that?
Anyway, we get to truly go out & celebrate our anniversary for the first time in double digit years. This Friday we leave for the City to go do family therapy with son#2 and then spend the night somewhere. To me it doesn't matter where as long as there's no dogs in my bed and no kids waking me up.
Dinner out & tickets to a local playhouse will round out the weekend Saturday. I can't tell you how excited we are to just be alone together for more than an hour!! It's the little things I'm tellin ya! Enjoy them & everything else is gravy.
No marriage is perfect because none of us have that privileged title individually. We're flawed humans just trying to make it work together. To me it feels good to have someone by your side, helping you fight, love & laugh through the hills & valleys. So good that sometimes you wanna strangle them in their sleep. (Did I say that out loud?)
Life is never easy for any one person and when you combine two people the baggage can sometimes overwhelm the union. For us it's all about having God guiding your decisions, family and friends to fall back on when you're not able to hold yourselves up, and being able to be yourself.
I don't have some secret key to making marriage work, I don't have really good advice other than be yourself. Be genuine and like yourself. Don't loose yourself. I think of it as we had security & confidence in ourselves when we were young & met, so if we keep that going, it's most likely attractive to the other person wouldn't you say? You give your husband time...you give your kids time & attention...why wouldn't God want you to give yourself that?
Anyway, we get to truly go out & celebrate our anniversary for the first time in double digit years. This Friday we leave for the City to go do family therapy with son#2 and then spend the night somewhere. To me it doesn't matter where as long as there's no dogs in my bed and no kids waking me up.
Dinner out & tickets to a local playhouse will round out the weekend Saturday. I can't tell you how excited we are to just be alone together for more than an hour!! It's the little things I'm tellin ya! Enjoy them & everything else is gravy.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Ten Things Tuesday
What? I can pretend. Shut up.
Ten Things I'm Thankful For Since We Have A Little Less Autism in the House:
10. I can leave everything unlocked!!!!!! Food,the fridge,cabinets,trash,cleaning products--the list is endless!!!!
9. We can eat when we're hungry & not on a scheduled plan. Not to mention the bonus of getting to leave dishes out or on the stove if I want & no one will play in it.
8. We can eat OUT as a family!!
7. My water bill is considerably lower & there's A LOT less laundry-towels/sheets. I need new towels though--after so much washing they look like someone tried to gnaw their way out of 'em.
6. I can have decorations out around the house & candles lit--for the first time EVER!
5. I have time to myself in my own house!! My thoughts get finished (most of the time) and I don't feel like a Tasmanian devil.
4. One less school to keep up with. Papers, meetings, special days & occasions, backpacks & snacks.
3.I can soap out in my bathroom & kitchen without the fear of someone eating it.
2.I can have my front door open to watch for the bus in the mornings & afternoons or just to watch for the mail.
1. And the number one reason I am thankful to have a little less Autism in my house is--Hiney wiping. It has been almost a month since I've wiped someone else's hiney. It makes me wanna cry.
Ten Things I'm Thankful For Since We Have A Little Less Autism in the House:
10. I can leave everything unlocked!!!!!! Food,the fridge,cabinets,trash,cleaning products--the list is endless!!!!
9. We can eat when we're hungry & not on a scheduled plan. Not to mention the bonus of getting to leave dishes out or on the stove if I want & no one will play in it.
8. We can eat OUT as a family!!
7. My water bill is considerably lower & there's A LOT less laundry-towels/sheets. I need new towels though--after so much washing they look like someone tried to gnaw their way out of 'em.
6. I can have decorations out around the house & candles lit--for the first time EVER!
5. I have time to myself in my own house!! My thoughts get finished (most of the time) and I don't feel like a Tasmanian devil.
4. One less school to keep up with. Papers, meetings, special days & occasions, backpacks & snacks.
3.I can soap out in my bathroom & kitchen without the fear of someone eating it.
2.I can have my front door open to watch for the bus in the mornings & afternoons or just to watch for the mail.
1. And the number one reason I am thankful to have a little less Autism in my house is--Hiney wiping. It has been almost a month since I've wiped someone else's hiney. It makes me wanna cry.
Sunday, October 09, 2011
Visiting Hours Are Over
We got to go up to the City & see son#2 last night!! I was like a kid waiting for Santa. The brothers were excited but they were at opposite ends of the spectrum on it. #3 was excited to see his brother & play with his toys. #1 was NOT excited about having to travel & leave the house (a.k.a computer) at all. I packed stuff for the kids since 2 hrs in the car each way is very new to them. Charged all our electronic devices & the portable dvd player and through in their favorite movies. I got some snacks, to go visit we leave so early, yet it falls right in the middle of dinnertime & to wait until after visitation is too late for the kids. And me.
Son#3 and I also worked on making cards for #2
to hang up on his wall of family pictures & such.
We need rain here so badly, and about half way there it started pouring. And it didn't stop until about the same point on the way home. Dry as a bone here at the house. Go figure.
We met son#2 in the cafeteria--we got there right at 6pm when visitation starts. We waited awhile because he was finishing up a shower after dinner.
But as soon as I saw him outside, I ran to him & the first thing he did was kiss me right on the mouth!!! My baby missed me!!!!!
He smiled and we went in to see everyone, who was already staring out the window because I'd been squealing like a school girl.
He was a little confused meeting in the cafeteria. Their days are so scheduled, he knew he'd already been there, eaten dinner & was supposed to be in his room. So like the son we know and love, he started his hunt for food.
But once he settled down & started chasing his little brother around & ignoring son#1, he was fine. He watched one of his favorite videos with son#3 and I could tell he had missed his Sesame Street peeps. He stared at that screen forever. I couldn't stop touching him. Hugging & leaning, loving & just snuggling him.
Son#2's personal assistant--"PA" (24/7 staff person that rotates out in shifts/days) is the same girl we met the first day-LaToya. So it was nice we could chat with her again & really get an idea of what's been going on. We've had phone calls of bruises & scratches--some explained, some not. As a mom, that's difficult being so far away. He's a boy,I get that bruises & scratches will happen--especially with this kid. But getting a call that your kid has a bruise on his cheek and you're so far away & no one can tell you HOW it happened...sucks rotten eggs. You feel helpless & a tiny bit like you failed because you didn't keep him safe. I'm still trying to understand with a personal assistant with you 24/7, how you have an unexplainable bruise. But when I saw him, saw it was all okay, he looked great, I could move on. The nightly phone calls are nice--when they remember.But, nothing beats seeing him in person!!
Leaving wasn't as difficult as I thought it'd be. For me or him. He was ready for meds & bed and I was just content to see him & know he's okay. There's something heart warming about knowing that he had fish nuggets, green beans,and macaroni & cheese for dinner and that he might get to go to the park today. Son#3 was the crier. He bawled & bawled that he didn't want to leave his brother. And he didn't get to go to see his room & play with his toys. It was cute.
It was a little bit of a stressful drive home with all the rain and the kids being tired & cranky in the backseat. However, to this mama, it was ALLLLLLLLLLLLL worth it. Totally.
Thursday, October 06, 2011
Seasons Change
Hello again.
So much has changed since my last blog that I hardly know where to start.
After a very long & challenging summer with son#2, we were able to have prayers answered recently for his care.
He has struggled with some manic issues this summer and after trying FIVE different medicines, we ended up pretty bad violent outbursts for the whole month of August. It took the bad med two weeks to leave his system, but once we found the med that was "just right", it was smooth sailing.
However, it became glaringly obvious that son#2 needed some help with new habits. And his medicines dealt with in a controlled environment where we weren't left with six holes in the walls to repair & he didn't end up with two big black eyes. It was much more than we were sadly able to provide him with.
After much frustration at turning to people with supposed expert advise & resources, we met a brick wall. (When the local Autism Resource Center doesn't know where to point you, someone's not doing their job (RESOURCE center?)OR we have a truly unique individual that God has entrusted us with.
We believe God opens doors. And ours came in the form of a place ironically called Camelot.
At Camelot they didn't blink when I mentioned son#2's meds, his violent outbursts, his non-toileting issues, naked time or sensory affinity for poo. That's right, I said it. If that rankles your tail feathers you might as well stop reading now.
Camelot welcomed us, knew what to do with son#2, and had a plan of attack on all the above mentioned issues & more. Camelot even had an opening September 8th. That could only be God people!!!
So many questions. Camelot is a live in, residential treatment facility & so son#2 will have to live there 24/7 for anywhere from a few months, to a year or more.
I don't know that I could have been more scared & relieved all at the same time.
We went for an interview and then they got to know about son#2 and his issues.
They finally approved him and to boot, he gets one on one staff. That means wherever he goes he has one person that is his personal staff attendant.
Which it IS a full-time job keeping son#2's hands out of his pants. I'm sure he's not the only male with that problem...
I didn't have warm fuzzies about the place, but after checking around they seem to know their stuff & to be honest, the next closest place that takes non-verbal Autistic kids is Kansas.
Two hours to Oklahoma City doesn't look too bad.
Checking in took hours & hours. And we even had to inventory his stuff & put his name on all his clothes. Sounds like checking your parent into a nursing home doesn't it? You know they need the service & care they can provide. You know you've done all you can do, but still, to leave them there in someone else's care...
it's the hardest thing you've ever done. It is for me.
Son#2 is easily adjusting. He does love the Build-A-Bear bunny we got & recorded my voice on. He's sleeping with it & loves to push the mommy button over & over. His brothers helped "build" it. When it came to making a special wish for son#2, and kissing the heart, I found it so endearing son#1 was over to the side really talking to the little red heart. I hugged him & asked what he wished for his brother.
"To never come home so I can have my own room." *sigh!* That's a teenager for ya!
The brothers know he's away for a long time. To not let them think he was being sent away for bad behavior, we told them it was camp. And so they wouldn't want to go themselves, we said it was to learn potty training & how to keep his clothes on. The first day after he was gone, son#3 asked me as soon as he got off the bus, "Did you go get him yet?"
His workers & staff are literally arguing over who gets to be his one on one.
That's comforting. I pray daily no one abuses him, hurts him or looses their patience. That they keep him safe & healthy. And that he shows him on smart he is & learns some new habits.
He's taking lots of walks and keeps a tight schedule. The good news is they call almost every night. We get to be on speaker phone & hear him laugh and he looks intently at the phone when we talk. And sometimes hangs up on us or puts us on hold.
It's quite an adjustment. There's relief of the tension with which we're used to carrying in ourselves and there's also grief for me. Hubbo has a better time with the big picture. While MY head knows that & I'm a smart girl, my heart feels much differently about the situation.
I'm amazed by the workmanship God created in the human form! We can feel so many emotions that usually cancel one another out, yet all at the same time---andd my heart doesn't explode. At least not yet. Check back in with me next week.
In the meantime, if you pray, please say a little prayer for son#2 when you think of us. This is a challenge & while it is going to be a good thing for him & our family, they WILL be asking things of him he won't want to do---otherwise we would be doing them here.
So much has changed since my last blog that I hardly know where to start.
After a very long & challenging summer with son#2, we were able to have prayers answered recently for his care.
He has struggled with some manic issues this summer and after trying FIVE different medicines, we ended up pretty bad violent outbursts for the whole month of August. It took the bad med two weeks to leave his system, but once we found the med that was "just right", it was smooth sailing.
However, it became glaringly obvious that son#2 needed some help with new habits. And his medicines dealt with in a controlled environment where we weren't left with six holes in the walls to repair & he didn't end up with two big black eyes. It was much more than we were sadly able to provide him with.
After much frustration at turning to people with supposed expert advise & resources, we met a brick wall. (When the local Autism Resource Center doesn't know where to point you, someone's not doing their job (RESOURCE center?)OR we have a truly unique individual that God has entrusted us with.
We believe God opens doors. And ours came in the form of a place ironically called Camelot.
At Camelot they didn't blink when I mentioned son#2's meds, his violent outbursts, his non-toileting issues, naked time or sensory affinity for poo. That's right, I said it. If that rankles your tail feathers you might as well stop reading now.
Camelot welcomed us, knew what to do with son#2, and had a plan of attack on all the above mentioned issues & more. Camelot even had an opening September 8th. That could only be God people!!!
So many questions. Camelot is a live in, residential treatment facility & so son#2 will have to live there 24/7 for anywhere from a few months, to a year or more.
I don't know that I could have been more scared & relieved all at the same time.
We went for an interview and then they got to know about son#2 and his issues.
They finally approved him and to boot, he gets one on one staff. That means wherever he goes he has one person that is his personal staff attendant.
Which it IS a full-time job keeping son#2's hands out of his pants. I'm sure he's not the only male with that problem...
I didn't have warm fuzzies about the place, but after checking around they seem to know their stuff & to be honest, the next closest place that takes non-verbal Autistic kids is Kansas.
Two hours to Oklahoma City doesn't look too bad.
Checking in took hours & hours. And we even had to inventory his stuff & put his name on all his clothes. Sounds like checking your parent into a nursing home doesn't it? You know they need the service & care they can provide. You know you've done all you can do, but still, to leave them there in someone else's care...
it's the hardest thing you've ever done. It is for me.
Son#2 is easily adjusting. He does love the Build-A-Bear bunny we got & recorded my voice on. He's sleeping with it & loves to push the mommy button over & over. His brothers helped "build" it. When it came to making a special wish for son#2, and kissing the heart, I found it so endearing son#1 was over to the side really talking to the little red heart. I hugged him & asked what he wished for his brother.
"To never come home so I can have my own room." *sigh!* That's a teenager for ya!
The brothers know he's away for a long time. To not let them think he was being sent away for bad behavior, we told them it was camp. And so they wouldn't want to go themselves, we said it was to learn potty training & how to keep his clothes on. The first day after he was gone, son#3 asked me as soon as he got off the bus, "Did you go get him yet?"
His workers & staff are literally arguing over who gets to be his one on one.
That's comforting. I pray daily no one abuses him, hurts him or looses their patience. That they keep him safe & healthy. And that he shows him on smart he is & learns some new habits.
He's taking lots of walks and keeps a tight schedule. The good news is they call almost every night. We get to be on speaker phone & hear him laugh and he looks intently at the phone when we talk. And sometimes hangs up on us or puts us on hold.
It's quite an adjustment. There's relief of the tension with which we're used to carrying in ourselves and there's also grief for me. Hubbo has a better time with the big picture. While MY head knows that & I'm a smart girl, my heart feels much differently about the situation.
I'm amazed by the workmanship God created in the human form! We can feel so many emotions that usually cancel one another out, yet all at the same time---andd my heart doesn't explode. At least not yet. Check back in with me next week.
In the meantime, if you pray, please say a little prayer for son#2 when you think of us. This is a challenge & while it is going to be a good thing for him & our family, they WILL be asking things of him he won't want to do---otherwise we would be doing them here.
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Ten Things Tuesday
Ten Things Tuesday
1. Sugar-Free Vanilla Carmel coffee creamer. To me it tastes like maple flavored oatmeal. Yum!! And more importantly it gets me up & around in the mornings.
2. I'm thankful that even though I overslept this morning, I STILL got my son's lunch made & breakfast in time to catch the bus. All that in ten minutes.
3. Son#3 is soooo excited this year about presents & Christmas, so it's fun to see his eyes light up at every thing he sees a commercial for. When you have son#2 that has never been able to tell us or Santa a Christmas list...you'd be thankful too.
4. I'm very appreciative to get to know a new fellow mother in the trenches battling Autism. She has other things on her plate as we all do, but she's a strong mom and that makes her an ally. I am always thankful for another one of those.
5. Our Christmas party at book club was last night and I was in charge of the craft. I was very pleased it went well. But I'm praying for one of our regulars who missed for the first time in I can't remember how long. Ms. Evelyn is 90 years old. I know the holidays will be a little less joyous for her family with her in a nursing facility, but she's a strong woman and I know she can get better. It wouldn't be the first Christmas miracle.
6. My house is getting more organized--closets & rooms--feels GOOD. Clutter BE GONE!!!!!!
7. Even with teacher gifts, I only have a couple more gifts to get. Hallelujah!!
8. I'm thankful for Dr F that sees my kids and that she listens to ME. She is available to us. I can email, call her office or home. And I even have her cell number. She and nurse Gina are our biggest blessings with our kids Autism. They've been with us since 2000.
9. By some wild miracle, my husband made it into his Fantasy Football playoffs. He had a great season, but by some weird rules that don't make sense to girls, he almost didn't make it in. But he did. I'm thankful that I don't have to hear about that anymore. Don't tell him I said that. He thinks I'm just happy for him.
10. Pot roast is in the crockpot. Roasted potatoes on a cold winters night...I'm thankful my family has the choice of the food they want & a warm house to enjoy it in. And that we aren't too busy to eat dinner together tonight.
And a bonus 11. I am SO thankful that a dear, dear friend of mine was proposed to by a man that sees her for the wonderful, giving person she is. And will honor her all the days of their lives!! YAY!!!!
1. Sugar-Free Vanilla Carmel coffee creamer. To me it tastes like maple flavored oatmeal. Yum!! And more importantly it gets me up & around in the mornings.
2. I'm thankful that even though I overslept this morning, I STILL got my son's lunch made & breakfast in time to catch the bus. All that in ten minutes.
3. Son#3 is soooo excited this year about presents & Christmas, so it's fun to see his eyes light up at every thing he sees a commercial for. When you have son#2 that has never been able to tell us or Santa a Christmas list...you'd be thankful too.
4. I'm very appreciative to get to know a new fellow mother in the trenches battling Autism. She has other things on her plate as we all do, but she's a strong mom and that makes her an ally. I am always thankful for another one of those.
5. Our Christmas party at book club was last night and I was in charge of the craft. I was very pleased it went well. But I'm praying for one of our regulars who missed for the first time in I can't remember how long. Ms. Evelyn is 90 years old. I know the holidays will be a little less joyous for her family with her in a nursing facility, but she's a strong woman and I know she can get better. It wouldn't be the first Christmas miracle.
6. My house is getting more organized--closets & rooms--feels GOOD. Clutter BE GONE!!!!!!
7. Even with teacher gifts, I only have a couple more gifts to get. Hallelujah!!
8. I'm thankful for Dr F that sees my kids and that she listens to ME. She is available to us. I can email, call her office or home. And I even have her cell number. She and nurse Gina are our biggest blessings with our kids Autism. They've been with us since 2000.
9. By some wild miracle, my husband made it into his Fantasy Football playoffs. He had a great season, but by some weird rules that don't make sense to girls, he almost didn't make it in. But he did. I'm thankful that I don't have to hear about that anymore. Don't tell him I said that. He thinks I'm just happy for him.
10. Pot roast is in the crockpot. Roasted potatoes on a cold winters night...I'm thankful my family has the choice of the food they want & a warm house to enjoy it in. And that we aren't too busy to eat dinner together tonight.
And a bonus 11. I am SO thankful that a dear, dear friend of mine was proposed to by a man that sees her for the wonderful, giving person she is. And will honor her all the days of their lives!! YAY!!!!
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